I told fww about the site yesterday.

It's not good!

I thought she would be proud, I was wrong.

OC is apparently not a good term for a child.

Even My nieces have berated me.

WTF?

I thought this crap was over.

So your wife didn't know about MB all this time?

It's not like you're going to refer to your daughter as OC to her face. My H and I never use that term when we're talking to each other. In fact, the only time I use it is when I come here. It's just an abbreviation used for the sake of clarification on an internet forum. Did you explain it like that?

Maybe once she becomes more familiar with MB and what it has to offer she'll warm up to it.

Right...just like we don't refer to our husbands as 'dh' IRL conversations.

Sounds like she was looking for an excuse to be angry.

I never call my daughter OC either--just to clarify the context for forum purposes only.

Perhaps she needs to understand that this forum helps guide us toward enhancing our marriages, learning how to love better, and even gives helpful advice on making good choices. It's a wonderful tool that saves lives. Not meant to degrade.

No good deed goes unpunished.

Your good deed?
Raising OC as your own beloved child.

We use such terms OM, OW, BW, BH, WW, WH, COM, OC ..... simply as a shorthand to distinguish the persons involved from each other.

Your wife cares NOT for the term OC?
Does she have an opinion of the term BH?

(((( hugs ))))

And THANK YOU for being MAN ENOUGH to raise the OC in a warm loving home.

Your child(ren) are blessed to have YOU.

I

This is kinda what I was thinking, I also agree with the other words of folks here regarding the site. I think this site can be very intimidating to someone without some prior knowledge of MB, Dr. Harley's writing, and generally a slow orientation to the concepts. For instance: I had (obviously) been trying to encourage my exww to come here for a long time. Even when the divorce was eminent I suggested she come here for support. She evidently finally logged on one day and then reported to me that she got discouraged because there were "kids" posting -- the best I can figure is she saw a post from someone who had fewer than 20 posts and was listed as a "junior member." Oh well, I tried.

With this particular forum, even though it's not about marriage per se, I think it's essential to understand the concepts prior to coming here. I was a member for a year before I ventured to open up that link - too scared.

The language, acronyms, set-up, and flow of the site are very logical. However they are unlike others I've seen. If you're family are familiar with others, or none at all, I can see why they might have been intimidated.

I would encourage you to go around the site with her for a period of time, pointing out things like # of posts. To me a sign that it's a serious tool - people just don't hang around long enough to post 30 and 40 thousand times unless there is validity.

I also think things like this site, and MB, and lots of other good things are just simply not for everyone. If that's the case for your fww, I only hope she will not discourage you from coming here if it is helpful. It may be something to POJA because you don't want it to become IB.

opt