I'm pretty simple. All I need is to be loved and not deceived.

Oh, and a boat...lol.

Now we need to negotiate dry stack and wet storage. H is stuck on dry stack. I'm planning to use respectful persuasion to convince him to switch to wet storage by next spring. H has never been part of a 'dock culture', and I think he would LOVE it. He thinks it's bad for the boat, better to keep it dry when not in use. I've been part of dock culture and I think it would add to our boating experience (and H's potential client base<<see what I did there?).

But for now, we're dry stack, it's not important enough for me to press, I'd rather encourage by exposure. I just wish the flipping thing would get here already!!! It's being shipped in from another location.

I'm glad that you didn't perceive my comment about DH being able to "relax" as my way of insinuating that it will help you relax, so your DH can relax and connect.

Things don't have to be perfect to be good and things that "look" good can also be bad.

YOU could start by being honest with me instead of trying to bait me into your creations of chaos where you think I would win?

That would be helpful.

Him threatening punishment doesn't mean you are incapable of it as well.

I figured you griped about the situation to someone and the grapevine did it's work.

The more and more I think about it Plan B is in order for you CWMI. I don't think you are capable (not from lack of ability, but from just trying for so long) of reigning in your Taker anymore.

Your Love Bank is deeply in the red.

Could you have done better? Probably.

Is there stuff on your side of the street you need to work on? I think so and I think you would agree with me.

You commit LBs, you could probably do better at meeting ENs. You're not getting a free pass on that, but I think it likely that you have done all you can do and suffered all you can suffer.

But you don't have to be PERFECT in order to be loved, you have to be trying. I don't think you can try anymore. I think you're tapped out.

Do you think it POSSIBLE you could muster up the energy for one last go - round? To take your family on this trip that has landed in your lap and try to make the best of it. Try to be loving and pleasant. Drop the attitude and eliminate the DJs for a couple of days? One last try to reconnect with your husband. Give him one last chance to meet your needs?

Nobody on my @#!+ list ever wonders if they are on there, I tell them.

Nobody on my @#!+ list ever wonders if they are on there, I tell them.

This boat thing is AWESOME. Lots of FC over the weekend, and a boating date night of UA. It really challenges us on working together when anchoring and docking, and we've sailed though those challenges (punny!). A funny communication gaffe: we were pulling anchor, he at the bow and I at the helm, and I was following his direction on pulling forward or back when he said, "Kill the power!" I immediately shut off the engine. He looked at me like I was crazy, said, "What the &^$# are you doing?" I said, "You told me to kill the power, so I shut it off." He said he *meant* to put it in neutral (where it was, btw). I said, "Well just say that then!"

Euphemisms. This may be a place to practice direct language.

GO PLAY WITH YOUR SPOUSE.

In 2008, psychologist James Graham at the University of North Carolina conducted a study to see what sort of activities kept partners bonded. He had 20 couples who lived together carry around digital devices while conducting their normal daily activities. Whenever the device went off, they had to use it to text back to the researchers and tell them what they were up to. They then answered a few questions about their mood and how they felt toward their partners. After over a thousand of these buzz-report-introspect-text moments, he looked over the data and found couples who routinely performed difficult tasks together as partners were also more likely to like each other. Over the course of his experiments, he found partners tended to feel closer, more attracted to and more in love with each other when their skills were routinely challenged. He reasoned the buzz you get when you break through a frustrating trial and succeed, what Graham called flow, was directly tied to bonding. Just spending time together is not enough, he said. The sort of activities you engage in are vital. Graham concluded you are driven to grow, to expand, to add to your abilities and knowledge. When you satisfy this motivation for self-expansion by incorporating aspects of your romantic partner or friend into your own skills, philosophies and self, it does more to strengthen your bond than any other act of love. This opens the door to one of the best things about misattribution of emotion. If, like those in the study, you persevere through a challenge � be it remodeling a kitchen yourself or learning how to Dougie � that glowing feeling of becoming more wise, that buoyant sense of self-expansion will be partially misattributed to the presence of the other person. You become conditioned over time to see the relationship itself as a source for those sorts of emotions, and you will become less likely to want to sever your bond with the other party. In the beginning, just learning how to relate to the other person and interpret their non-verbal cues, emotional swings and strange food aversions is an exercise in self-expansion. The frequency of novelty can diminish as the relationship ages and you settle into routines. The bond can seem to weaken. To build it up again you need adversity, even if simulated. Taking ballroom dancing lessons or teaming up against friends in Trivial Pursuit are more likely to keep the flame flickering than wine and Marvin Gaye.