Mr A. Wow. You are doing great. Don't worry about WW anger. It will pass.

Women LOVE a strong man with the balls to fight for his wife and family. When she gets home with that anger ... you be the the calm and strong ROCK that is fighting for his family.

Hold your head high. WW will respect you after the shock of exposure has died down.

Deep breaths.

Listen, without going into a point by point comparison, there are many similarities between my story and yours. WW's have similar backgrounds and attitudes.

You have done a bang-up job finally with exposure. Most of us are very hesitant and incredulous at first, but you came around quickly. I am glad you snooped when you did and finally got the cold water in your face you needed. Just don't let up now, you need to ruthlessly and unemotionally destroy this affair, burn it to the roots and then kill the roots, because it could come back.

I know some of the measures you are being advised to do may give you pause. You need to separate the personal from the legal. Make sure you take legal control.

I waited around, never really considered taking control. My wife eventually filed and then things were on her timetable and under her direction.

The things you have done so far, I wish I had done sooner, wish I'd found MB sooner. The things I am suggesting you do, I didn't and wish I had.

I'm divorced, get it?

My husband went bat [censored] crazy when I exposed. He is still furious, embarrassed etc. But he is home. It didn't kill the affair, but it certainly hastened its death. They never were able to be seen in public, it was an affair in the night because of exposure and it ruined any FUTURE they were dreaming up. She may be mad, crazy, hate you for months but long term it is the right thing to do. Hang in there!

I think that MrA is dealing with his WW right now. I am hoping he's listened. He's done so well so far.

Following the story, I hope he has listened, and trusts others in the trenchs also.

Yep, WW and MrA evening is likely right now.

Prayers for Mr.A to stand strong and lead.

stay strong Mr A, and listen to the vets they will get you through this

Stay strong, my brother.

Wishing you solid direction, my friend. Do not waver.

MrA -- well done!

Please remember -- when she tries to make "exposure" the crime of the century that she will "never forgive you for" just how hypocritical and ridiulous that is.
You're willing to forgive ADULTERY -- I think that ADULTERY is a much bigger deal than TELLING ABOUT ADULTERY.
Just remember who really has the right to be upset right now.
Don't buy into her victimhood.
She brought this on herself.

Let her know she is free to leave, but the rest of the family members will remain at home where they belong.

Her flame should burn out pretty quick.
After she's spewed out all her anger, she'll probably be weepy and sulky. Or sullen and silent.

She'll get over it.

Tell your kids. I know you don't want to. But they need to know whats going on. And they deserve the truth.

Thinking of you today Mr A, sending you wishes for the strength required to get through this.

Ditto !

And .....


Give OM's GF your wife's email addy and her cell number.
..... should be interesting.

Every word is exactly spot on.
FOLLOW Lexxxy advice.

OMG not good at all. wedding ring and necklace from this yrs anniv are out on the highway. she has repeated with great anger how done we are. she has no love left and there is never a chance for us. sounds many of her friends are very appalled that I brought this public and i am the biggest [censored] on earth.

She said she is filing Monday a.m. and will be seeing her lawyer. I need to do 1st from what i see posted here.

Threatened lawsuit of defamation of character cause now everyone thinks she is a "whore" .

She is extremely volatile and at times been violent to me in front of DD4 and 6 last nite. Kids are freakin out. I'm trying to remain calm and tell her not in front of kids but she just continues to say they need to know mommy does not love daddy anymore and won't ever be together. I need a voice recorder.

My personal phone was dumped into toilet as she & I struggled over it. she took it and started to read sent msgs and found where i had sent OM txts to my phone which I emailed to myself and secret account. Told her I did that to rub it in her face when she lied about contact.

My pastor friend I revealed that I was getting council about going NUCLEAR. They were friends prior to us getting married but I was very close to him and called him from beginning of whole affair. She actually called me prior as his wife called WW and warned her what i might be doing. GRRRR at me. I was just trying to get advise. She said the judge will think me nuts to expose affair cause you never hear anyone do this and how the hell is that supposed to help save the marriage and the family.

How should I handle the fact I have no legal rites to DD11 and DD15. says she should stay at house with all kids because of those dynamics. help needed here. quickly ... I am at my parents house eating after we went to church. she had no plans to go but i did. then she said she was going and taking DD4 and DD6 not me so I couldn't tell the judge she was keeping them from going to church.

How is it defamation of character for telling the TRUTH. Let her make her threats just remain calm and wait for the vets to talk you through this. You definately need a VAR that way your WW doesn't go making up lies about you hitting her or something outrageous like that.

She goes from crying eyes out and puking to extreme anger. Both of us were at the alter praying this morning...not together obviously...

btw I have our laptop at parents and my phone is non functional as a hotspot since it went in toilet last nite. Not easy to check back here today. I wanna go home and see kids but I need some answers...coaching...I feel lost and without compass right now. Hard to think strait.

MrAmazed,
Your wife is going through her own hell right now, she has to come to terms of who she is now, she knows everyone else now sees what she has decided to become as well........she can't hide behind that fantasy world right now. her Om is probably ignoring her trying to deal with his own problems.......so she is mad at you for destroying her fantasy and she is sad at the thought of f'ing up her world, her kids world and yours believe it or not.......
This stage usually only lasts for a week or so and then they calm down and see the reality of the situation, the key for you is to not lose your temper, just keep saying I love you and will do what I have to do to save our marriage and life together, do not move out.......tell her is this new life is what she wants she can go........
Let her go to her lawyer that to should give her a good look at reality, anything can be undone.......she is beside herself right now......
Think about it if it were you in her shoes, let her feel it all and don't save her right now....
Make sure the kids are protected as much as you can.....and sit tight........
Patience and letting her live through this right now is all you can do.......
Just don't leave the house, if she goes tell her you are sad that this is what she is chosing for herself.............Let her know you will be there for her when she decides to come to her senses.......

Why is she angry?
Because her adultery is no longer her dirty little secret.

CALL the cops next time she does something violent in front of the kids.