SadandMad I am sorry that you're here, but you are in the right place. If you haven't checked out some of the other threads in the Surviving an Affair section I would recommend you doing so, as it seems there are things that apply to you. Exposing this affair, which will hold your WH accountable, and get you some support. Also I think it would be wise to request a polygraph from your WH. Since you have been 'in recovery' it seems he is still feeding you trickle truths, and the only source of 'truth' you are getting is from the OW and the one thing we know about her is that she is willing to cheat with a married man and be the source of lies and deceit, in other words, she is NOT a very good source for information. You are not truly in recovery if you don't know the truth. I had over a year of trickle truth and I do not want to see you waste your time in what could be recovery just getting more trickle truth. Also, order and read Surviving an Affair, and get as much info off this website as you can in the meantime, this website has a lot of info for you to start using in your path to recovery. As well as knowledgeable vets to guide you.

My DDay was in 2010, I still have days where I cry a lot (yesterday) and ask questions about the A. I think there will be people on here who have been recovered for a decade who say that, although sparingly, they still shed tears over their WS's A. You are just a couple months into this and everything is fresh in your mind. You are and will be on an emotional rollercoaster for awhile. Just as you would with any traumatic event, which is exactly what this is. It took me a year to just get to the point where I could get enough control of my emotions to get on this forum and try and move forward. I too obsessed with OW and how I could destroy her life as she has mine. I still have fake FB accounts that I monitor OW on and am just about ready to let that go. (PS I wouldn't suggest these things as HEALTHY just saying I've been there) My point is, this is a traumatic experience in your life. You will be on an emotional rollercoaster and it will take TIME as well as a lot of hard work on your M to heal from this. That is normal, expected.

Oh sorry SAM! I didn't see the DATES of this post, from 2011. I am about a year off on my advice it seems, lol. Still learning how to navigate. Just ran into your other thread and will catch up on your story there.

hi UW

THanks for the lengthy post...lol.

My dd was in 2010 like yours and it's nice to know I am not the only one who cries alot still and ask questions about the A. I am sorry you have to be in the same boat though
I stopped stalking her on FB because it only mad me worse and didn't let me any time to recover. Someone said to me on here that NC is NC for both of us so by me snooping I was breaking that. One of the other reasons I was snooping though was to see if she was writing anything that alluded to her and wh being in contact even thoguht i am pretty sure it's well and truely dead.

thanks for telling me I am normal. Bad day today!