Hi IG. I know it is not ideal and I certainly didn't direct her to this thread. Well before I had posted here, I gave her the book HNHN to read. She read a chapter or two but really had no interest. I took the book back and told her about this site if ever she wanted to learn how to save our marriage.

At some point she has read this thread, but again I don't think her interest is very great and she certainly doesn't like reading about her faults and the attacks on WS's.

I did encourage her to write something here herself once she found out but she won't do that in fear of her actions being criticized and she HATES being criticized for anything.

While not ideal, I think I could do worse than to have my wife poking around this site.

I'm not clear what you mean,how could she possibly know about your thread if you didn't direct her to it?

The only possible way I can think of is she has a keylogger on you

Or does she merely know about the site and 'might' have read this thread while 'poking around'

If the latter, there's no problem. Your thread is not very different from the usual BH thread. All our stories are very alike and the 'unknown AP' 'she moved out' sitch is SO common. I can't see her figuring it out at all.

However if you have real concerns or any real signs that she knows, (her paranoia about a break in is just usual wayward paranoia) you must tell the mods to take down your thread.

If she knows about your plans, in fine detail as opposed to knowing about MB in general, they won't work. Shell anticipate and block you. She doesn't want you to win her over in spite of herself.


Don't try to educate a drunk. If she's interested in getting sober, this will be a great resource for her then but its useless to her until that time. You can Plan A and Plan B someone without ever mentioning MB and in fact it is preferable that you do.

IG, she knows I frequent this site. I have not pointed her to this thread but she did mention about me possibly putting a GPS on her car and she didn't like being called wayward. To be honest though, I think she would avoid reading this site too much as there is too much criticism of her behavior for her to feel comfortable here.

I highly doubt she has a key logger or any sort of spying on me. While she has always been a snooper, I don't think she has gone that far. I don't believe she's ever felt the need as she has always had free access to everything. No secrets ever from my side of the marriage.

I don't feel like my wife is deliberately blocking me. In fact I think she is slowly letting her guard down and allowing more and more time together. I have the odd setback where I get frustrated with a lack of affection not to mention zero SF but hey, I'm still going.

Today, she actually said she believes deep down that we will be together and things will be good again. Don't know if this is just her dangling a carrot when she sees me starting to show frustration or not. We have been talking on the phone lots and will again later tonight. Certainly starting to fill her need for IC.

Today, she actually said she believes deep down that we will be together and things will be good again. Don't know if this is just her dangling a carrot

It's much closer to playing the fish she's got on her line, my friend. Waywards traditionally are much "craftier" than betrayeds. Our task here is to educate the betrayeds that want to improve their situation.

That is, of course, virtually impossible if she's reading what we tell you!

How can you fight for your marriage and the battle if they know your moves ahead of time?

I would request your thread to be taken down. Still get help from the board though.

nak, Is this your thread?
If so, then man up and post on here instead of being vague.