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Ok, could use some help from FB pro's here. I set up an account and can find a person, but do not know how to add all of their contacts into a Word doc. Do I have to be friends with them first? I don't see how I am going to friend OM.
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Ok, could use some help from FB pro's here. I set up an account and can find a person, but do not know how to add all of their contacts into a Word doc. Do I have to be friends with them first? I don't see how I am going to friend OM. Can you see his friends? If so, click on his "friends" link until all his friends come up. Once his friends come up, right click, scroll over the page until selected and then copy. Paste the contacts into a WORD doc. You will get lots of pictures, but you can go through the page, click "contrl" on the person's name and it will take you right to that persons page. When you get to the persons page, click on "message" and send them the message. Space your messages out 60 seconds apart so they do not shut you down for flooding.
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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[It is the POSOM that is telling his wife nothing is going on, she has no proof, and she only has me to provide her with information that I have. Can you link to some piece of evidence so that the OM cannot deny the affair? Otherwise, he will just deny it. One thing you could do is upload a key damning piece of evidence to your facebook page and leave it open so all your exposure targets can see it. For example, if there is some kind of email, card, etc, scan it and upload it to your page. It is very easy to do and will instantly remove any deniability. Thank you for the letter comments, I'm nervous but have to go through with it. When this explodes, do I just smile and say I'm sorry you feel that way? I know the after affects of this are going to be nasty. I agree it is nerve wracking! you are right on in your response. Just smile and expect some fallout!
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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Sorry to be an idiot on the FB stuff, I am tech saavy but resisted FB for years and am the last person to sign up.
I'm practicing on someone to see what I'm looking for. On the left I can see all of the friends. I see where I can message each one of them but am confused about copy/pasting all of the contacts, do I need to address my letter to each person? It doesn't give their email address so assuming I can just message them directly from this page; waiting 1 minute in between sending them my message, right?
Sorry, just want to make sure I do this right.
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Sorry to be an idiot on the FB stuff, I am tech saavy but resisted FB for years and am the last person to sign up.
I'm practicing on someone to see what I'm looking for. On the left I can see all of the friends. I see where I can message each one of them but am confused about copy/pasting all of the contacts, do I need to address my letter to each person? It doesn't give their email address so assuming I can just message them directly from this page; waiting 1 minute in between sending them my message, right? correct! And the reason you need to paste all the contacts into a word doc is because when the OM gets wind what you are doing, he will shut down his facebook page. I would prioritize his contacts in this order: close family, family, married friends, all other. With some you won't be able to tell, so just guess.
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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Ah, got it so I still have their names at least. Thank you!
One problem, I can't find the POSOM by just doing a search. My buddy said he might not be "open to the public" in his settings so now I'm not sure how to track him down. Suggestions?
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Just spoke to OMW, she's sending my WW an email to stay the ___ away from her family. I'm not telling her what I'm doing since she will resist (she did back in April when I asked for OM parents phone number).
I really want to get this done tonight so this bomb impacts everyone by tomorrow. I just need to get my family picture on my new FB page and then find the POSOM.
If anyone can throw advice my way on searching for him or why I can't locate him, please help!
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FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.
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FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.
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You are awesome BrainHurts! Got it. Now I'm scared ____ to do this and I don't know why. I'm worried OMW is going to be pissed at me for exposing as they've been very quiet and not telling anyone about the A. Should I wait and ask her? He's only got about 80 contacts so should only be a few hours to do this.
Hate that I'm having second thoughts, just fear this is going to blow up in my face. I can deal with my WW contacts, but feel off going after OM contacts.
Need some help/encouragement!
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Melo,
I, too, felt like you do now -- what a schmuck I was! I dragged my feet about 3 months longer than I shouldve to expose...we could be 3 months further along in recovery.
I look back now and think: what the hell was I so wooried about???
You know what happened? My W and her OM got PISSED, my W had to decide our marriage or the OM, and the affair DIED. I saved my marriage, I was a hero to my kids for saving their mother, saving our family.
That's it. That's all. Exposure killed the affair. Wonderful consequences.
DO IT, my friend....take it from a former 'doubting Thomas' -- IT WORKS!!!
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I'm worried OMW is going to be pissed at me for exposing as they've been very quiet and not telling anyone about the A. Should I wait and ask her? Would a general telegraph his war plan to the enemy? I kind of doubt it. You didn't start this war, but since you're in it, fight it. All's fair in love and war. What do you care about what the OMW thinks anyway? You're not fighting for her marriage. You're fighting for yours. But, incidentally, she may not appreciate it at first, but you WILL be helping her as well. She'll realize that one day, and probably thank you for it.
Every man I meet is in some way my superior; and in that I can learn of him.
-Ralph Waldo Emerson
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FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.
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Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 12,357
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Just spoke to OMW, she's sending my WW an email to stay the ___ away from her family. I'm not telling her what I'm doing since she will resist (she did back in April when I asked for OM parents phone number).
I really want to get this done tonight so this bomb impacts everyone by tomorrow. I just need to get my family picture on my new FB page and then find the POSOM.
If anyone can throw advice my way on searching for him or why I can't locate him, please help! Good for OMW!  Don't lose sleep if you can't connect with OM - get his friends' list. Expose to them. He already knows he's having an affair with your wife. Can you get his cell phone number? Call him directly and let him know that Hell has just arrived on his doorstep.
D-Day 2-10-2009
Fully Recovered and Better Than Ever!
Thank you Marriage Builders!
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I'm worried OMW is going to be pissed at me for exposing as they've been very quiet and not telling anyone about the A. Should I wait and ask her? He's only got about 80 contacts so should only be a few hours to do this. You need to stop operating on fear and do what is best for your own marriage. Exposing is best for the OMW too but she just doesn't know it. You aren't going to win if you operate on fear. You need to kill this affair and move forward, Sir.
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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You are awesome BrainHurts! Got it. Now I'm scared ____ to do this and I don't know why. I'm worried OMW is going to be pissed at me for exposing as they've been very quiet and not telling anyone about the A. Should I wait and ask her? He's only got about 80 contacts so should only be a few hours to do this.
Hate that I'm having second thoughts, just fear this is going to blow up in my face. I can deal with my WW contacts, but feel off going after OM contacts.
Need some help/encouragement! Melo, if she gets pissed, consider it a casualty of war. That's what you're in right now - a war for your marriage. Don't worry about collateral damage. BANISH all second thoughts. GET THIS DONE - I think you have a good chance to save your marriage, but you must act NOW!
D-Day 2-10-2009
Fully Recovered and Better Than Ever!
Thank you Marriage Builders!
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I got no sleep last night but was ready to do this first thing this morning. I found OM last night and was going to work on this today but he pulled the plug on his FB page over night! I told no one of what I was going to do and copied/pasted all of OM contacts in a Word doc. Since I couldn't message them from his page, I searched for them and messaged the first one and it gives me a general message below....help!!!
"Some of your messages have been reported as spam. To avoid getting blocked, make sure your messages are in line with the Facebook Community Standards."
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Just keep trying to send it. Has your wife been reading here?
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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I am, no luck - am not sure if I'm blocked for the next 24 hours as I keep getting that same message.
She is not, but am concerned OM might be as he knows I'm here (my WW told him I am here).
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He knows I am here and I hope he reads and follows my posts. I am not going away without a fight.
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