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Viper #2647947 07/19/12 09:53 PM
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Originally Posted by TigerWes
Dammit t2c, just do it! Quit wallowing in fear, and just do it. I would also include in your exposure the fact that he is an ex-con. As long as you have waited to do this, I can't see how it could do more damage than you have already done to yourself by your refusal to do this however many months ago.

Hate to say this, but you are your own worst enemy.
Drop the hammer t2c.

Or like Dr. Harley says "fish or cut bait".


FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.



BrainHurts #2648936 07/23/12 03:00 AM
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Hammer has been dropped. Still deciding on whether to expose to her fellow teachers that she works with. I am about 80% sure that the new number from Georgia is a teacher that works with her now. The texts are following the same pattern as the first time including a text a 3 am in the morning. Let me know what cha think BH.


Me (H): 34
Wife (W): 29
Two kids ages 5 and 3
Married 6 years been together for 14 years
totally2confused #2648938 07/23/12 03:23 AM
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Originally Posted by totally2confused
Hammer has been dropped. Still deciding on whether to expose to her fellow teachers that she works with. I am about 80% sure that the new number from Georgia is a teacher that works with her now. The texts are following the same pattern as the first time including a text a 3 am in the morning. Let me know what cha think BH.
Good.

Can you find out info on this new OM? Is he M? If they are having an affair do a workplace exposure.


FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.



BrainHurts #2649103 07/23/12 03:19 PM
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This is the message I got from her this morning...


"I don't know why you think I'm having an affair, but you emailing everyone only makes you look crazy. Dragging my name through the mud is not helping me want you back. It's actually having the exact opposite effect. This is harassment. If it continues, I will call the police."

This is the message I got from one of her friends....

"This is private and personal information that I have no desire to hear about, but I will keep your family in my prayers. I will keep YOUR children first and foremost in my prayers because they will have their innocence ripped away totally by publicized accusations. There are people who can help you, but this isn't the format to reaching that help. I am not sure what you truly hoped to accomplish by your actions earlier this morning when your message was sent, but I would be surprised if it helps your situation. Publically attempting to embarass and humilate a love one tends to seal their anger and destroy any hope of working out a problem."

What should I say to my WW now?


Me (H): 34
Wife (W): 29
Two kids ages 5 and 3
Married 6 years been together for 14 years
totally2confused #2649670 07/25/12 12:43 AM
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I wouldn't expose to the workplace unless it's an affair with a coworker.

Who is this OM2?

What happened with OM1? Didn't you catch him in your house?

If you truly made a dent in the exposure expect your WW to say those things.

Is she still in an affair?


FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.



BrainHurts #2651164 07/29/12 06:45 PM
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OM2 I believe is a co-worker. WW is a teacher and they teach on teams and her team was switched up this year so I not sure if this guy is Texting her to try and get the new school year worked out.

OM1 is out of the picture. I haven't seen any text from him for a couple months.

At this point I don't have any solid proof of another affair... Yet.


Me (H): 34
Wife (W): 29
Two kids ages 5 and 3
Married 6 years been together for 14 years
totally2confused #2651195 07/29/12 08:14 PM
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Originally Posted by totally2confused
OM2 I believe is a co-worker. WW is a teacher and they teach on teams and her team was switched up this year so I not sure if this guy is Texting her to try and get the new school year worked out.

OM1 is out of the picture. I haven't seen any text from him for a couple months.

At this point I don't have any solid proof of another affair... Yet.
Then do not do a workplace exposure without solid proof.

Are you still trying to Plan A from afar? Are you proceeding with a D?

Are you splitting the kids time? Where is she living at this time?


FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.



BrainHurts #2651618 07/30/12 11:23 PM
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I have not filed for a D and she has not filed for a legal seperation yet either.

Right now I get the kids on my days off because of my work schedule. She is still living with her parents.

I am not doing plan a at the moment but would love to start again but not sure how to start back up. I thought about sending her a letter asking what I could do to be a better husband.


Me (H): 34
Wife (W): 29
Two kids ages 5 and 3
Married 6 years been together for 14 years
totally2confused #2651620 07/30/12 11:34 PM
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Did you ever write Dr. Harley? Did you hear back from him?


FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.



BrainHurts #2652384 08/01/12 11:43 PM
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I did write him but have never heard back.

Maybe I need to send again.


Me (H): 34
Wife (W): 29
Two kids ages 5 and 3
Married 6 years been together for 14 years
totally2confused #2652387 08/02/12 12:30 AM
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Originally Posted by totally2confused
I did write him but have never heard back.

Maybe I need to send again.
Yes and notify the MODS and make sure you have a something in your subject line.


FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.



totally2confused #2652388 08/02/12 12:31 AM
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I have notified.

If you get no response, please let me know,,,,,


JustUss

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JustUss #2652390 08/02/12 12:33 AM
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Originally Posted by JustUss
I have notified.

If you get no response, please let me know,,,,,
Thanks JustUss.


FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.



BrainHurts #2652395 08/02/12 02:02 AM
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Thanks JustUss.

BH us there anything I can be doing while I wait for a response.


Me (H): 34
Wife (W): 29
Two kids ages 5 and 3
Married 6 years been together for 14 years
totally2confused #2652404 08/02/12 03:32 AM
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Did you ever send her the letter? Have you asked her out on a date? How is your Plan A going?

I know you struggled with IC. Have you tried writing to her daily? Love you and thinking of you notes?

Wasn't IC one of her top EN?


FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.



totally2confused #2652487 08/02/12 09:33 AM
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Have you checked your email?

Dr Harley & Joyce notified you via email on July 19th that your email was read on the air on the radio show on the 19th and answered.

Check your mail please.


JustUss

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JustUss #2652555 08/02/12 12:45 PM
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I just checked my email and can't find it. Might have deleted it by accident.

I will listen to July 19th radio show.

Thanks for all the help JustUss and BH. I also would like to thank the Harley's.


Me (H): 34
Wife (W): 29
Two kids ages 5 and 3
Married 6 years been together for 14 years
totally2confused #2652559 08/02/12 12:48 PM
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If you are serious about saving your marriage, you can't get it all on this forum. You've got to listen to the Marriage Builders Radio show, every day. Install the app!

Married to my radiant trophy wife, Prisca, 19 years. Father of 8.
Attended Marriage Builders weekend in May 2010

If your wife is not on board with MB, some of my posts to other men might help you.
markos #2652560 08/02/12 12:50 PM
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Thanks Markos.


Me (H): 34
Wife (W): 29
Two kids ages 5 and 3
Married 6 years been together for 14 years
totally2confused #2652709 08/02/12 07:21 PM
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Originally Posted by totally2confused
Thanks Markos.
Which was your question? Are you Jacob in segment 03983?


FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.



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