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Reading link you put on here.I can't read very fast.My kids watch porn no way.I see your point.I know that I made her do thing she did not want to do.but I have not watch it in over 8 months.I can over come this.I would even prove it over time.homefor5 is a good women.She is honest witch I have not been to her.I would like to find away to win her heart back.Can you help me recover my marriage what's my steps. 1. Take a polygraph AND PASS IT. 2. Write a letter to the husband or boyfriend of every woman you screwed or otherwise affaired-with while your dear wife was at home making you a hot dinner, bathing your children, reading bed-time stories, etc. Apologize to them for the grievous and callous disregard you had for their relationship. Give all of the letters to your wife to read and mail. 3. Shut down your computer. You're done being online, hombre. 4. Change your cell phone number. Give your new number out to no one. If they need to reach you, they can call homefor5. She can pass the message on. 5. Sit your children down and explain to them in age-appropriate language that you have been unfaithful to their mother and to them - that your life has been built on lies. Tell them that you intend to change this and make yourself the father they deserve. 6. Total accountability to homefor5. If you have to sneeze on your way to work, call and let her know that. 7. If you have FaceBook, shut it down. 8. Go to the doctor and get tested for STDs. 9. And in case you missed it the first time: Take a polygraph. And buster, you'd BETTER PASS.
D-Day 2-10-2009
Fully Recovered and Better Than Ever!
Thank you Marriage Builders!
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Taking poly on Tuseday.Changed my phone number an only a select people have it.I need to do step 5 still.She will not want me to do 6.Do I do it any way?I need to do 7.Will the poly help to restore trust?I need to stop lineing rigth.
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Going to a take poly so she can get the true.Hope this is not for nothing.I pray to God this can be repaired.I am so sorry to God for what I have done. I am very sorry for the ones who I have hurt because of my fleshly sins.
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You have to decide that your wife, her feelings and your marriage are more important than anything you want. That is a pretty heavy committment. It is one that you have not been able to make all these years. You put yourself and own selfish wants and desires first. It is almost impossible to change as much as you are going to need to change to be able to put her first.
BS Me 47,WH 49
DS's x3 17, 10, 7
Multiple D-Days
No disclosure by WH. No EP's, no transparency, no guilt or remorse either.
Plan C DOES NOT WORK!
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TJ what happened with that poly?
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Faild you guys real cooked my goose way do I do now
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Faild you guys real cooked my goose way do I do now What happened? CAn you be more explicit?
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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Don't worry about failing us right now. Worry about failing your wife. Worry about failing yourself. Everyone here wants to help you overcome these obstacles and help your marrige if that is possible. If you had not come completely clean with homefor5 before the poly, you probably were not serious enough or sorry enough for what you had done. The absolute complete truth has to happen first. Why? Why weren't you honest?
BS Me 47,WH 49
DS's x3 17, 10, 7
Multiple D-Days
No disclosure by WH. No EP's, no transparency, no guilt or remorse either.
Plan C DOES NOT WORK!
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Faild you guys real cooked my goose way do I do now Tell us the results of the test. What were they?
D-Day 2-10-2009
Fully Recovered and Better Than Ever!
Thank you Marriage Builders!
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I real was he said my beathing I was trying to cheat.I was coming clean.One ? That gets me have I ever touch my kids inaporital.I have a 14 and 12 year old they know dad would never touch them like that.I could of walk away at any time why would I have taken it if I knew I would not pass.
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I could of walk away at any time why would I have taken it if I knew I would not pass. Because you know it would look worse if you walked away.
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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Faild you guys real cooked my goose way do I do now For starters, HOW ABOUT TELLING THE TRUTH???
If you are serious about saving your marriage, you can't get it all on this forum. You've got to listen to the Marriage Builders Radio show, every day. Install the app! Married to my radiant trophy wife, Prisca, 19 years. Father of 8. Attended Marriage Builders weekend in May 2010 If your wife is not on board with MB, some of my posts to other men might help you.
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Yeah, turns out those polygraph tests really work, huh? you guys real cooked my goose No, sir, you did that. The way you lived has come back to bite you. And you have no interest in changing, so there's no way out of this. I'm pretty sure you've already been told what to do and you haven't done it yet, so what's the point in a bunch of marriage builders posters repeating themselves and repeating information you could easily read if you were serious?
If you are serious about saving your marriage, you can't get it all on this forum. You've got to listen to the Marriage Builders Radio show, every day. Install the app! Married to my radiant trophy wife, Prisca, 19 years. Father of 8. Attended Marriage Builders weekend in May 2010 If your wife is not on board with MB, some of my posts to other men might help you.
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I could of walk away at any time Saying this does not make you noble or attractive to your wife. You should be begging for the chance to stay, not suggesting that you might be thinking about leaving.
If you are serious about saving your marriage, you can't get it all on this forum. You've got to listen to the Marriage Builders Radio show, every day. Install the app! Married to my radiant trophy wife, Prisca, 19 years. Father of 8. Attended Marriage Builders weekend in May 2010 If your wife is not on board with MB, some of my posts to other men might help you.
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So TJ, lets have a little talk about polygraphs here.
I know your wife has asked you for a polygraph. I highly, highly recommended this to her.
I understand you have vetoed that idea, siting finances as your reason.
I would put money on the fact that you have secrets you are still hiding from your wife, either about the A's she now knows about or others that she doesn't. I would put money on the fact that this is the REAL reason you have vetoed a polygraph.
IF this is true, and you are still hiding things from your wife, you have this golden opportunity to finally come clean and turn your life and your marriage around. She came here as a BS who was WILLING TO WORK THROUGH THIS. But to work through this you need to TOTALLY COME CLEAN. You need to tell her EVERYTHING you have done to destroy your marriage.
If you are planning to go to her and trickle truth her, and tell her a little bit more, but not all of it, save it. For one, she is wising up to your ways and she will KNOW just as I did that you are still being dishonest. Second, trickle truthing her is worse than just not telling her anything at all. And finally, I will STILL be advising her to get that polygraph to confirm what you told her, so if you didn't tell her everything you will be back to square one. I see that you completely ignored this post. You have made one big giant mess of your life, and now, instead of trying to do whatever you could to clean it up WHICH IS WHAT YOU HAVE BEEN SAYING YOU WANT TO DO, you instead pour gasoline on it and light it on fire. You not only continue to lie to your beloved wife and children, but you are on here lying to all of us too. You have no intention of revealing your SSL, and no intention to change it. Until you do, I'm out. We will know you are serious when you come back here and actually take enough time to post that you write legibly, good grief I thought you were from another country or something. To find out you are just too lazy to hit the capital or period button on your phone. Silly me.
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I real was he said my beathing I was trying to cheat.I was coming clean.One ? That gets me have I ever touch my kids inaporital.I have a 14 and 12 year old they know dad would never touch them like that.I could of walk away at any time why would I have taken it if I knew I would not pass. Then, do another one. And if you don't like the results of that one, do another one. Somehow I think they're all going to say the same thing. SO. What did the poly find you lying about? Be explicit, please. You're saying you failed the poly, and that your children are involved. If you don't trust the (very solid) results of the poly, TAKE ANOTHER ONE. Pick your polygrapher. Let us know the results. Until then I am very wary of you and very protective of your wife and children.
D-Day 2-10-2009
Fully Recovered and Better Than Ever!
Thank you Marriage Builders!
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This guy is a waste of time....
He won't even take the time to check his sentences or his spelling. A few errors are one thing, but he doesn't care. He skips most of the posts because he's trying to use his phone to reply. I'll bet he hasn't even read most of the posts on his thread nor any of the introduction posts for newbies.
He gives a knee-jerk reaction to most questions and lacks the desire to post any of his own thoughts..... typical wayward....
He wants a mommy to come along side of him and tell him what to do, as long as this new mommy will do it for him too.
Very sad! I feel so sorry for his wife.
Recovery began 10/07;
Meeting my wife's EN's is my "thank you" that refuses to be silenced.
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I would like to talk to my wife about taking it again but have to get the cash.I will do anything to make her feel rigth and safe.Next time I get to pick him out.
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Last edited by markos; 07/27/12 01:59 PM.
If you are serious about saving your marriage, you can't get it all on this forum. You've got to listen to the Marriage Builders Radio show, every day. Install the app! Married to my radiant trophy wife, Prisca, 19 years. Father of 8. Attended Marriage Builders weekend in May 2010 If your wife is not on board with MB, some of my posts to other men might help you.
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Posts: 15,818 Likes: 7
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He won't even take the time to check his sentences or his spelling. A few errors are one thing, but he doesn't care. He skips most of the posts because he's trying to use his phone to reply. Yes. If he really cared, he would go to the library and use the internet there and read every post, and he would answer the questions asked of him, and do the things recommended. He is so lazy he doesn't even want to hide the fact that he is lazy. Recovery is not for the lazy.  I'll bet he hasn't even read most of the posts on his thread nor any of the introduction posts for newbies. Yes. If it were really true, as he says, that he will do anything to make her feel right, then he would start reading. But he is too lazy to do that. He wants her to just think he went through the motions, and accept that.
If you are serious about saving your marriage, you can't get it all on this forum. You've got to listen to the Marriage Builders Radio show, every day. Install the app! Married to my radiant trophy wife, Prisca, 19 years. Father of 8. Attended Marriage Builders weekend in May 2010 If your wife is not on board with MB, some of my posts to other men might help you.
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