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Joined: Aug 2012
Posts: 3
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I found out about 2 1/2 weeks ago that my husband has had an affair. I asked some questions and you have answered them. I have been on some projects and asking a lot of questions and getting some answers. I did write a long letter you my husband and the questions that I have asked him, he has only answered 3 of the questions and I feel that he is not honest with me and yes he is still blaming everything on me. His last email he stated that he's not sure if he wants the marriage or not and that is after I had asked him again if he is still in contact with the other woman. He is also really upset at me that I have had some counseling with my pastor and his wife and that I have also told our 2 adult sons everything.
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Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 20,481 Likes: 6
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Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 20,481 Likes: 6 |
I found out about 2 1/2 weeks ago that my husband has had an affair. I asked some questions and you have answered them. I have been on some projects and asking a lot of questions and getting some answers. I did write a long letter you my husband and the questions that I have asked him, he has only answered 3 of the questions and I feel that he is not honest with me and yes he is still blaming everything on me. His last email he stated that he's not sure if he wants the marriage or not and that is after I had asked him again if he is still in contact with the other woman. He is also really upset at me that I have had some counseling with my pastor and his wife and that I have also told our 2 adult sons everything. Welcome and sorry for what has brought you here. Who is this OW? Is she married?
FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.
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Joined: Aug 2012
Posts: 3
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I did get some answers from a military source of things that I can and can't do since he is in the Army. One thing that can't be done is order of no contact. My husband in returing home soon after 1 year of deployment. My sons and I have talked about who we want to be with us for support when we see my husband/their father for the first time. He may not like who we want there because a lot of them are our pastors and their wives.
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Joined: Aug 2012
Posts: 3
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her divorce was final on July 13, 2012 and she did it. Her husband tried everything to keep the marriage and their family together.
Last edited by Feel_Betrayed; 08/15/12 08:23 AM.
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Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 20,481 Likes: 6
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Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 20,481 Likes: 6 |
FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.
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Joined: Mar 2011
Posts: 1,709
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Joined: Mar 2011
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her divorce was final on July 13, 2012 and she did it. Her husband tried everything to keep the marriage and their family together. Did OW BH expose the affair?
ME: BW
HIM: FWH
Married 18 yrs
DDay 09/2008 and 12/2008
Recovered
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Joined: Jul 2008
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Joined: Jul 2008
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Feel_Betrayed,
Her husband tried everything to keep the marriage and their family together.
Can you please direct her husband here? There is still a chance her husband can reunite his family if he follows the MB program. Does the OW have younger children?
God Bless
Gamma
Last edited by Gamma; 08/15/12 09:05 AM.
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Joined: Jun 2008
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Have you exposed to the Army, his family, friends, your family, or just your two sons and pastor?
He is the cheater, it's not up to him to dictate to you what the circumstances will be, it's up to you to decide what you require in order to stay with him and up to him to agree to it and comply. Otherwise there isn't much that can be done other than getting out of the M. You do NOT have to stand for more of the same. Has he written a "no contact" letter to the OW and have you sent it?
What do you mean you can't enter "no contact"? Sure you can! Yes he can still see his kids, but you get an intermediary for that.
How old are your kids?
Have you read the materials on this site? Please get "Surviving an Affair" book asap!
Enacting life's lessons into positive change... .
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Joined: Jan 2012
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I did get some answers from a military source of things that I can and can't do since he is in the Army. One thing that can't be done is order of no contact. hi FB, and welcome to MB. i am sorry for what brings you here. in regard to your comment above; i am not sure what "no contact" you mean. do you mean between your WH and the OW? is she in the army too? you absolutely can get a NC order on them! or did you mean between you and your WH? please clarify on that, and whether OW is in the army as well. you are lucky (in an unlucky way) that your WH is in the army. you will have access to the kind of resources a civilian doesn't when it comes to affairs. i look forward to seeing your next post so we can help you. please include length of your M, how many children & ages, and whether or not your WH has had a previous a. and as much info on the OW as you know.
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