Weren't you trying to get a job near the kids?

Why have you stopped trying to get a job near your kids.

I am trying to get a job in New York, but it is very difficult in my field.

Had a great four-day Father's Day weekend with the boys. I have them again this Friday for about 10 days!

It's kind of weird when they suggest that their mom and I should get back together. They say it all the time.

What do you tell them?

Today is the 10th anniversary of my wedding.

We had an amazing wedding. It was in the Hamptons on Long Island. The reception overlooked the ocean. The weather was perfect. That night we stayed at the Four Seasons in Manhattan, then flew to Paris the next morning.

For our honeymoon, we spent a week in Paris and a week in Provence eating the best French cheeses and quaffing wine. It was idyllic to say the least.

Cut to 10 years later...

Her affair took our marriage, our house, our savings, our retirement, and has hurt all of us beyond imagination.

OM is gone. After WXW moved back with her parents, the adulterous relationship dissolved within 6 months.

I live in alone in an apartment. WXW and the kids live a thousand miles away in her parents' house.

For the past week I've had the kids with me at my apartment. I have them next week too. It's great having them here.

They fly as unaccompanied minors all the time nowadays. When I picked them up at the airport last week, my eldest (8) said: "It's good to be home, Dad."

It's on days like today that I wonder how WXW is dealing with it. It's hard enough for me, but for her the guilt must be overwhelming.

Happy anniversary, WXW.

Don't assume the guilt is overwhelming.
From my experience and reading others, waywards JUSTIFY their actions.
I'm sorry; I know it's probably a rough day for you.
Have some ice cream with your kids and be thankful for what you do have.

Sorry for your pain today. Special days are tough.

Build new memories. Do things with your kids. Make it your "kid anniversary ".

Stay busy, my friend. What self care are you doing for yourself?

Yes, before the affair ended, I would agree. But now, I doubt it. For a mother to see her sons in pain and know she's the cause must be devastating.


We did exactly that. Got the boys for another whole week too!




I exercise. Eat right. Listen to a lot of self-improvement cds. Have some good friends I hang out with. I'm fine really.

It's been a while since I posted on my own thread. I had a good summer. Had the kids for several weeks. It was fun.

I'm posting today because this morning WXW sent me a pic of the boys dressed for their first day of school. Nice gesture, right?

Unfortunately, my older boy was wearing a t-shirt from Whistler, Canada. This is where she spent a week last summer with OM. Yes, my son is wearing a commemorative adultery t-shirt on his first day of school.

She just doesn't get it, and she probably never will.

Too bad you can't Plan B her.

Sorry for the trigger.

Did you ever get to move close to the kids?

No, BrainHurts, I still live 1000 miles away. I'm spending a fortune on visitation.

TE,

Unfortunately, my older boy was wearing a t-shirt from Whistler, Canada. This is where she spent a week last summer with OM. Yes, my son is wearing a commemorative adultery t-shirt on his first day of school.

Sorry to hear that, but it's not uncommon for wayward spouses to attempt to legitimize their affairs in that and similar ways.

Do your sons know enough about the affair to detect when your WxW is dragging them into it?

God Bless
Gamma

Tell your son to bring it on his next visit and burn it

Good idea.

Trying, remind me, you told your kids, correct?

No, I did not tell my kids.

So what is the reason they THINK their mother and father D?

TE,

If your Sons do not know what happened they will blame themselves, they do not need dirty details but they do need to understand what OM did to their family.

Is OM around your Sons?

God Bless
Gamma

I know the position of Marriage Builders on telling the children, and I often struggle with the idea of telling them about the affair. My decision as of now is to not tell them until they are adults.

We often remind them that it is not their fault, to not to blame themselves, and that sometimes adults fall out of love, but that does not mean we don't love them.

OM is supposedly no longer in the picture. He lives in London and is nowhere near my sons.

..and don't forget to take a picture of the burning and share it too