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Jedi_Knight #2665685 09/15/12 11:23 PM
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That's stupid anyways I'll keep you guys posted tomorrow will be a sucky day I have to be in the house with her will do my best to ignore her. However if she starts to talk about the state of the marriage should I talk or ignore her?

Darkguy #2665686 09/15/12 11:32 PM
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If she starts her babbling about how the marriage is over or she's not in love etc ask her If she would like a cup of coffee then walk away

Jedi_Knight #2665691 09/16/12 12:01 AM
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DSC

Do you know if you live in a fault or no fault D state?

Darkguy #2665693 09/16/12 12:11 AM
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Originally Posted by DSC
That's stupid anyways I'll keep you guys posted tomorrow will be a sucky day I have to be in the house with her will do my best to ignore her.




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Not apologizing for exposure or speaking the truth in a kind yet direct way.

Exposure makes the infidel furious

stay calm
breathe

no one can stay furious forever ... being furious is exhausting ... consumes a lot of energy ... let the furious infidel fume and exhaust his/her self

YOU stay cool

You will hear:

"That's it. We are never going to stay married after what YOU did."
"I am moving out now, thanks to you."
"You are getting OP in trouble at home."
"Now our kids will have a broken home thanks to you."

blah blah blah

You respond to all the raging comments: I am still holding out hope for our marriage.

You stay calm

You don't argue

You don't explain

You do not preach

You do not educate

~and~ you do NOT apologize for standing up for truth and marriage and keeping your family intact

YOU calmly re-state your belief that there is hope for the marriage ....

if things get out of hand ... excuse yourself and go for a walk or a drive ...

remember ... exposure makes the already foggy spouse act insane ... but it is temporary





However if she starts to talk about the state of the marriage should I talk or ignore her?

nesre #2665698 09/16/12 03:51 AM
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I don't know what d fault is? New to this stuff. Thanks for the tips nes

Darkguy #2665703 09/16/12 05:36 AM
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Here is a link listing fault and no fault divorce states.
http://www.nvo.com/beaulier/faultvsnofaultdivorce/


"Get busy living, or get busy dying"...... The Shawshank Redemption.
Jedi_Knight #2665718 09/16/12 07:48 AM
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Originally Posted by HDW
Courts do not care about adultery in custody
They only care about the best interest of the child

Adultery does matter in custody and alimony issues.


BH: 46
FWW: 44
3 DD: 20,17,11
Married 24 years
PA/EA: 5/08
DDay: 6/08
NC: 8/08
Previous EA 1998 confessed 8/08
In Recovery
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Anyone know of a good cheap gps tracker to put into a car?

Darkguy #2665722 09/16/12 08:54 AM
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Originally Posted by DSC
Anyone know of a good cheap gps tracker to put into a car?
There is valuable info on this thread in the Operation Investigate forum: GPS Trackers


D-Day 2-10-2009
Fully Recovered and Better Than Ever!
Thank you Marriage Builders!

maritalbliss #2665727 09/16/12 09:27 AM
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Well sent a Facebook message to the ex wife I was able to track her down. Sent one to her sister as well hopefully I get some replies!

Darkguy #2665731 09/16/12 09:42 AM
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Originally Posted by DSC
Well sent a Facebook message to the ex wife I was able to track her down. Sent one to her sister as well hopefully I get some replies!

DSC Thought you were all done with exposure. If there is anyone left get it done ASAP.
You want the exposure out all at once and hopefully people calling WW.

No fault and fault D. Evidence you gather could make a difference in a fault state mostly with alimony and does have an influence with child custody.

nESRE

nesre #2665733 09/16/12 09:58 AM
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(When folks here ask about your plan, this is the kind of thing they want you to do. This would be my suggestion to you.)

DSC, go with your friend to the hotel. Have the friend drive.

FIRST, find your WW's car. Move it to a location she won't know about, even off the hotel lot if necessary.

THEN find them. What is your plan for determining their room?

THIRD, have your friend knock on the door. Have your camera ready. Snap, snap, snap! It does not matter if they're dressed or not, having them in a hotel room together should be of help later.

THEN, have your chat with OM. Calmly explain that he's about to reamed by military justice, with his career in the shi++er. Inform your WW of the same.

DO NOT get angry, do not get physical, do not let them provoke you into those states - if they do, they win HUGE points.

If nothing more looks promising, leave. Go to your WW's car and drive it home.

NeverGuessed #2665874 09/16/12 11:23 PM
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Well heard from OM ex wife and it's was horrid. This guy raped his daughter gave her chalymida, he is abusive, and extremely possessive. I really want to tell my wife this but she is in a fog. Also I believe they still contact each other. She refuses to send the NC and reveal the details surrounding her EA about this guy. She only told me bits and pieces. I know that she still plans on seeing him. I wanted to follow your advice NG but I can't leave my wife with a monster like that. He knocks the woman up and gets them addicted to drugs to control them according to the ex wife and her sister. My plan is to confront and tell my wife about this then maybe just maybe she will listen. Sleeping in the marital bed and asked her to as well she refused and is down on the futon. She thinks I put a recorder in the bedroom and a gps on her car. She is still doin dirt.

Darkguy #2665879 09/16/12 11:43 PM
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Originally Posted by DSC
Well heard from OM ex wife and it's was horrid. This guy raped his daughter gave her chalymida, he is abusive, and extremely possessive. I really want to tell my wife this but she is in a fog. Also I believe they still contact each other. She refuses to send the NC and reveal the details surrounding her EA about this guy. She only told me bits and pieces. I know that she still plans on seeing him. I wanted to follow your advice NG but I can't leave my wife with a monster like that. He knocks the woman up and gets them addicted to drugs to control them according to the ex wife and her sister. My plan is to confront and tell my wife about this then maybe just maybe she will listen. Sleeping in the marital bed and asked her to as well she refused and is down on the futon. She thinks I put a recorder in the bedroom and a gps on her car. She is still doin dirt.

DSC

Try to have the Ex wife call your W. Maybe hearing it from her will have some weight to it.

Can you change this?

Quote
Hoping to Using a plan to GET MY WIFE BACK

Last edited by nesre; 09/16/12 11:47 PM.
nesre #2665880 09/16/12 11:49 PM
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Yes. Have the ex wife or the sister call her

Jedi_Knight #2665892 09/17/12 05:55 AM
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I thought about doing that but she has stated constantly that just because she won't be with him means she won't be with me. I was planning on having the OM ex wife talk to WS mother and we both tag team her with the horrifying truth.

Darkguy #2665899 09/17/12 06:44 AM
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That's a good idea.
Try to get That done today.

Also has this man been around the kids? If she won't stop seeing him you may need to file for divorce and custody and Subpeanae the ex wife and sister.

Jedi_Knight #2665900 09/17/12 06:46 AM
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Also write a No Trespass letter and have the Sheriff serve him with it. (I can provide further instructions on how to do this if needed). How old is OM daughter,?

Jedi_Knight #2666014 09/17/12 03:23 PM
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She hasnt seen him since July 29 in west Virginia. He hasn't met my kids she is planning on seeing him this weekend in Chicago. He live is Florida and my WS and I live in Illinois. The daughter was 9 at the time of the molestation she is 16 now. My wife claims she doesn't talk to him anymore but I called the hotel and the reservations are still booked for this weekend. How do I get her to work on the marriage instead? She constantly says she wants a divorce should I ignore it?

Darkguy #2666025 09/17/12 03:44 PM
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This guy raped his daughter gave her chalymida, he is abusive, and extremely possessive...He knocks the woman up and gets them addicted to drugs to control them according to the ex wife and her sister.

Does the IG have this information, or at least these allegations?

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