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I agree with you 100% this is something that I have needed to due. I screwed up!! I need to due this for my wife and its the right thing to due. It is important to have their support. We always had a very close relationship with her parents in the past. Scared to face my mother in-law. Wish me luck!

KISS

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Originally Posted by kiss
I agree with you 100% this is something that I have needed to due. I screwed up!! I need to due this for my wife and its the right thing to due. It is important to have their support. We always had a very close relationship with her parents in the past. Scared to face my mother in-law. Wish me luck!

KISS

You might be surprised. You don't need luck, bud. Just acceptance of responsibility and humility.


"An expert is a person who has made all the mistakes that can be made in a very narrow field." - Niels Bohr

"Smart people believe weird things because they are skilled at defending beliefs they arrived at for non-smart reasons." - Michael Shermer

"Fair speech may hide a foul heart." - Samwise Gamgee LOTR
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Good luck


What would you do if you were not afraid?

"Fear is the little death. Fear is the mind-killer" Frank Herbert.

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so me and rocketqueen meet with her parents on Friday. It went about how I expected. Hopefully it's a step in the right direction. I know how important it is to her. Hopefully we can continue to correct my wrong doing.

KISS

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Rocketqueen and I just got back from Niagra Falls last night. It was great to spend some time alone with my wife. I enjoyed the alone time so much. It was great to be able to talk to her and not have the kids yelling for mommy or daddy. The food was great but expensive as we ate so much. We walked what seemed to be 100 miles. She was so cute with her hair all wet and crazy from the falls mist.

Thanks babe for a great couple of days,
KISS

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Originally Posted by kiss
Rocketqueen and I just got back from Niagra Falls last night. It was great to spend some time alone with my wife. I enjoyed the alone time so much. It was great to be able to talk to her and not have the kids yelling for mommy or daddy. The food was great but expensive as we ate so much. We walked what seemed to be 100 miles. She was so cute with her hair all wet and crazy from the falls mist.

Thanks babe for a great couple of days,
KISS
Good.

How did you do meeting the 4 intimate ENs?


FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.



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This is from the Recovery Thread:

Originally Posted by Rocketqueen
Originally Posted by HDW
Yes.
The budget should be agreed upon using the POJA.
Dr Harley addressed a call about a budget on yesterday's radio show.
He recommended a grocery store exercise as practice.

The thing with budgets is that they have to be followed.
I encourage you to sit down and talk to him about it.
I am familiar with business operations. As a manager Kiss is too. The budget should be a standard operating procedure. (SOP). His employer has an SOP. The household needs one too, agreed upon by the POJA.

Finances has been a long standing issue with us. I'd be the one making budgets and writing down every dime I spent and he would treat the debit card like it was a never ending pocket. We have been through bankruptcy and our home is being foreclosed. So this has caused a A LOT of stress.I wrote down the budget the other night while he was at work and gave it to him to look over. I asked him if there was anything he wanted to change and he answered no. He laughed at my budget that I put myself on ($100 for 2 weeks) because he says that I would go over it. Then he goes and spend more than that in 1 sitting. It's very frustrating.

Kiss is there a reason why you violated the budget?
Have you fixed this by returning the items?

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kiss,

I would advise reading (and following) Dave Ramsey's books on finances. It can be a bit disconcerting at first if you're used to using debit/credit cards but it's a good shock treatment to get out of a financial rut.

Violating POJA with the family budget is a pretty big Love Busters, you'll want to avoid that.


BH (me), age 30. Plan D final 1/1/13
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Brainhurts,

I tried making her feel like everything was about her. I thought it was a great time as I got to hold her and hold her hand a lot.

We did talk a lot but some times I feel like Rocket didn't want to talk. I would ask her to talk to me about anything and most of the time I would get what do you want to talk about". I would then ask her to talk to me about anything she wanted to talk about but I wouldn't get nothing. Then when I would try to start a conversation I would get one word answers. It was frustrating at times but I feel that she thinks about it to much sometimes and expects a barn burning conversation. I feel she thinks to much into it without letting it flow. I do feel the same way at times. Its like you put to much thought into what to say and get lost in the pressure of conversation by trying to make it spectacular or your thinking what to talk about.

KISS

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HDW,

I didn't return the pins but I did talk to Rocketqueen about why I bought them. The price I paid for them and the quantity of pins made it worth it. I only needed 4 pins and the other 12 will resell for the amount I paid for all of them.

KISS

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The point is not that they will resell or be worth it, the point is that you bought them without consulting her.


One year becomes two, two years becomes five, five becomes ten and before you know it, you've wasted your whole life on a problem you can't solve. That's one way to spend your life. -rwinger

I will not spend my life this way.
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Originally Posted by kiss
HDW,

I didn't return the pins but I did talk to Rocketqueen about why I bought them. The price I paid for them and the quantity of pins made it worth it. I only needed 4 pins and the other 12 will resell for the amount I paid for all of them.

KISS

Oh my, Kiss, do you actually read what you write? Do you actually sit there and convince yourself that what you are doing is the right thing to do? Do you actually sit there and tell yourself, "Well, I know I agreed to discuss this kind of purchase in the future with RQ (per POJA), but hell, it's just some pins...it's not that important."

I'm really not sure what the hell you are thinking or where the hell you are coming from. You should be bending over backwards to do everything to accommodate her and the first thing you do is engage in this kind of selfish behavior?? And for some KISS pins?? Hell, I'm a KISS fan too, but I sure as hell wouldn't put the purchase of some stupid assed pins before meeting the requirements that my wife has laid down for even a chance at reconciliation if I were in your shoes.

It's bad enough that you destroyed her with infidelity. But now you CHOOSE to destroy her further by making no real attempts to make some sort of amends for what you have done to her? You are showing her ZERO respect! And I mean ZERO!

You have a sense of entitlement that's simply amazing. You guys JUST went through the budget, and what's the FIRST thing you do?

Blow it sky high by buying some stupid KISS pins!!!!!

I'll tell you something, if I were to post to Rocket right now, I would tell her some things you don't want to hear. I can promise you that. You need to get your selfish [censored] in order and quick, or you're gonna find yourself on the outside looking in.

But I guess you'll have some pins to snuggle up to at night.

Not a total loss, huh? After all, they were a good price.

Good Lord, dude....pull your head out of your [censored]!

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Lol.
I didnt know they were KISS pins.
I guess that makes it an acceptable love buster then

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Originally Posted by HDW
Lol.
I didnt know they were KISS pins.
I guess that makes it an acceptable love buster then
That's why his name is KISS, because it's his favorite band. laugh


FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.



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Quote
The price I paid for them and the quantity of pins made it worth it.

Really?

"Honey, I know we're trying to build a new marriage and all, but these pins were much more important to me than you. After all, I'll get my money back, so it doesn't really matter that I broke your trust. You understand, don't you? The price was right. Um, RQ, where are you going? .........RQ?"


A smooth sea never made a skilled mariner.
~ English proverb



Neak's Story
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Originally Posted by Rocketqueen
Originally Posted by SunnyDinTX
Did Kiss re-read the IC chapter as prescribed?

No, I don't believe he has.

Aaand, I checked his phone last night and there were some friendly texts back and forth between him and a female co-worker that were not work-related. I just don't know what the heck I am going to do with him banghead

Kiss, do you want to be married?

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So, this is you working really hard, eh? What I got from your post is a sumtotal of holding her hand and asking for *her* to talk to you. What a waste of a trip.

What ens did you meet? Why didnt YOU lead the conversation?

And you got RQ to buckle on the pins ...got them listed on ebay yet?
sigh


fBW 49
xWH 55
DD 22
DDay 6/07
D 8/15
Letting Go
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Karmasrose,

I do realize that I should have spoken to her about it. It was not the money thing it was a respect thing. It was very stupid on my part.

KISS

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HDW,

yes more then anything. I had a talk with my pier at work today and told her that she can not text me unless it is work related. It was an uncomfortable conversation as she kept apologizing and wanted to text my wife to apologize. I told her that she didn't have to do that. She did understand as she knows that I am trying to make my family and especially my wife the priority.

KISS

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Letty,

No they are not listed on Ebay yet. I wanted to last weekend before we went away but the Hard Rock website was down for a couple of days as they were redoing the site. I take the pictures of the pins off the site because they are sharp and photos don't come out that well as me and Rocketqueen have tryed many times in the past. The best time to list is on weekends so tomorrow night I will be listing them.

KISS

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