Don't respond to your sil messages.

DSC

Did you try this suggestion by PepperBand?

May be worth trying and good to have on record for you and custody. Also a copy of the ER bill and medicin cost $$.

Would be worth considering for court. Shows you are wlling to provide for your children even under the circumstances. You just want verifiable proof of the bills incurred.

ETA-Have this medical info faxed or a copy of the bill e-mailed to you. A text with $$$ amounts is worthless and basically heresay.

nESRE

I asked and have yet to receive them. I know why my sons are sick they are not acclimated to PR weather. Im training for a half marathon. Trying to get my six pack back. Beat the hell out of my arms at the gym today got home fell asleep and couldn't wake up till now lol. WW is shaking in her boots 15th is almost here! POSOM came for sex got it and is sleeping peacefully not worried about her. I believe she knows that and is too stubborn, scared and worried I won't take her back cause she pulled something so stupid! Plan B in effect hell yea. I won't respond to anymore texts as well. Hopefully she can unfog her thinking so I can't keep our family together! if not oh we'll Ill be getting my son soon! God bless you all and keep me in your prayers! I'll be praying for a happy ending myself !

God grant me the strength to change the things I can change,
The serenity to accept the things I cannot not change and
The wisdom to know the difference

I wouldn't count OM out.
Many times an affair will just be put on hold when it gets hot

Can someone post the link to the wayward wife fog disassembled and decoded please

Actually that particular post was a WH, but it can be bumped.

Finished reading surviving an affair. I really want WW to read it but I'm in plan b would be a good idea to mail her a copy?

At the moment, I don't think so, since you are in Plan B. It would break the darkness between you and you do not want to do that right now. It would give you both a fix of each other that you don't need.

Vets?

Don't communicate with her.
Don't try to fix her.
You have enough issues comin up. A wayward in a fog will throw that book in the trash. Trust me, I tried it LOL

I second that. Remember, you can't educate a wayward.

I used to run a couple 13 mile races a month.
Since divorce I've had to scale way back due to having custody of 3 kids!
I'm going to hit 5ks hard next year. I am running a half marathon in a couple weeks.

During this stressful time, running (hard running like 10 miles a day) will keep you from becoming depressed. Plus it's great for your body

Here.
wayward fog disassembled and decoded
Female wayward fog disassembled and decoded

Had a break plan B. Spoke with her for about 10 min. She asked if I really want to split the kids up, preying on my emotions. I told WW that these past 3 months were her selfish decisions/actions based on having an A. So, in short I'm not splitting up the kids/family she is. WW told me she might have cervical cancer and I told her I'll pray for her and that I'm done talking to her. Conversation was about 10 minutes. She tried to prolong it and I halted that. I'm so looking forward to the court date can't wait to get my DS back and hopefully she will also relinquish my SS as well so they aren't split up as she says. Are there any other Dr. H books I can read to help me with this situation? Any good parenting books you recommend?

WW told me she might have cervical cancer.

Yeah, me too!

DSC, keep the hard edge. Every time she wants to trot out her "Woe is me!" crap, fix the image of WW, to facilitate her getting poked by POSOM, spiriting your children away and exporting them to a third-world location.

Your Plan B should be easier than most to maintain.

Well had another slipped today she had SIL text me that I need to pay for my sons plane ticket to the court date if I want to see him. LOL I told her I'm not sending any money cause I don't know if it's goin to a plane ticket or not. Also, I didn't send him there you took DS and the court ordered you to have him back on 25SEP12 and you didn't comply. She also says she can't afford it and she doesn't have a car in PR or any money. I told her it was her own fault not mine. She said she has to go back to PR and then back to USA on the 31 OCT because of thr domestic battery charge. If she had somewhere to stay then she wouldnt have to. Hinting I should let her stay in the marital home LOL. Then she said I need to pay her money cause she is entitled to my money LOL. I told her you left I'm not obligated to pay you anything go to court and good luck with that. She got mad and hung up. I called back to talk to my kids.

She wouldn't let me and said she went to base legal and they said she is entitled to my money and they will contact my command LOL. Then I asked her why she left with our kids and she said "So, you can see the marriage is over!" I said I still had hope for our marriage and she shouted "I hate you!" then hung up crying. She then called back this time with my SS on the phone sayin that he hate me as well. That hurt but I know he doesnt mean it she is using him as a weapon against me.

I told SS ask mommy where she was when you and DS where in puerto Rico. Also, ask her if she is talking to OM still. WW put him off the phone and hung up.
At this point I would usually be mad and sad but I'm not I'm calm. Call center prepared me for this and it works. 15th is almost here and I will have my son again. SS is another story I know he love being in PR cause he's not going to school has been out since 20SEP and they are spoiling him rotten. Sent text to SIL/MIL this is the last time I text them if they need anything to call my father regarding my kids. Praying that all goes according to plan.

1. Plan b WW
2. Get custody of my DS/file for D
3. Get child support from WW
4. Find a way to get SS from WW
5. Maintain plan B with little breaks as possible avoid LBs in interaction with WW.
6. Go to court in her domestic battery charge and tell the truth without concern of WW welfare.
7. Attend parenting classes
8. Attend anger managment classes
9. Get certified as a foster parent
10. Focus on ME exercise/college/advancement in USN career/ attend church/ pray for WW defogging and reconciliation.

Please let me know if I need to add anything to my list. Also, I didnt shout and show emotion during conversation. Avoided LBs repeated in my head; "Cooler heads prevail, Her words are not her words jus words of an addict who is in an affair. NG I do that when she wants a pity party I remind her that it's her actions that got her there. All the while, thinking about her in the hotel with POSOM. I asked her again why she was in the hotel that POSOM made a reservation for and paid for. She told me he didnt show up and she was there with MIL lol. I said how did the kids get to PR by themselves? You said your mom flew with them there and when I was @ the hotel confronting her I didn't see MIL at all. Lies in a fog sound so ridiculous I wonder do WS every hear the crap they say.

There is ZERO chance she's showing up at the court date with either child, and she's likely to not show up herself.

What "boots on the ground" do you have in PR to track her movements toward bolting to any jurisdiction with unfriendly relations to the US, one which would be very interested in giving "refuge" to a US service-woman fleeing the onerous abuse of the militaristic male-chauvinist gangsters of the USA? Think: Venezuela or Cuba. Is there some sort of "no-flight" enforcement the government can help you with?

Man, I can see bad things in your future if you continue to put all trust in the "system".

I am really glad to see your strength DSC. WOW!!!! Keep it up. One thing, try to keep the kids out of any conversation about who she is with. I would probably have done the same thing, but by doing so, you put your SS in an awful situation. He is loyal to his mom no matter what. He also loves you very much and wants to be loyal to you. But, as you can see he is going to be more loyal to his mother. He is too young to take on any of this guilt. She is an awful woman for putting her son in that situation in the first place. Her talking to him about the need to hate you is so sad and unacceptable. Having him call you to TELL you is deplorable. Look at the turmoil she is putting him in? Look at what she is teaching him. Then, she made him act on her teaching!!! Keep notes here DSC. Use this in your artillery against her.

She can't get a passport HDW provided me a link to lock his passport. Also, I have military friends still in Puerto Rico. I got the reserve center there tracking her movements. If she doesn't show to court then I will go to PR using them, local police and NCIS to get my son back using the court order that's valid in all territories and 50 states. I got my bases covered legally. I think since she hasn't been compliant with the order of protection they might arrest her or fine her. IDC either not my problem. This is tough but I still see the light at the end of the tunnel just gotta stay my course! God bless you all.

If she is arrested would you be able to take custody of your SS? He is in a very unsafe situation with her. It would be best not to split the kids up. Any chance you can prove her unfit and get both children? Your home is your SS's home, any hope there?