Good advice. Thank you.

My kids tends to do this more so when they are tired (at bedtime). We had shopped at a used bookstore to pick up some more bedtime books since bedtime is when they miss him most. They picked out several, but i added some in that included love, family, support, etc themed. Worth a try.

Have you changed your number yet?

Have you told you DS7?

You should handle it exactly as LR suggested. It is extremely confusing for children for you to say that their father loves them, when their father isn't acting in a loving manner. It creates conflict in their growing brains because this doesn't seem like loving behaviour and an adult is telling them that it is. It will teach them to accept these actions as loving in the future, and they may also act in this manner as well.

BH had some great questions. What are your answers?

Yes mason it is hard trying to explain WAywards to little children, as we know they tend to blame you, and the wayward will allow it too, if they can use it to get thier way.

Remember you are the authority, and also hold the definition of what love looks like.

As far as the other parent is concerned, it is up to them to reassure thier children that it will be allright and they are loved. Whatever the "It" is that they are worried about, the most important thing is to reassure them it is not thier fault, and they are safe.

Yes the fear they have is the most damaging I agree, but your confidence and reassurance will be a lighthouse for them

Thinking back to my childhood I remember how it felt to me of how I thought my Dads problems were my fault, and vowed my children would never have to feel that way

Of course my late wife with her problems did not care and my children suffered during her death, but they knew without a doubt she made her own choices, and were not engulfed in guilt. The youngest was 18 at the time but he did have his moments of feeling responsible for not saving her. It's allways hard

Personal accountability is allways a hard thing to teach your children, and it is so nessesary to do that with little kids when this happens, to make it clear it is not thier fault, and they will be ok

Telling them that someone loves them when thier are no examples, will just confuse them, Telling them it will be allright helps them, and they need it, and is what they want to hear

It will be better too, and you can find lots of ways on the forums of how to explain what love looks like, and why Daddy is not there anymore

Little kids understand what love is, they are born with the knowledge, May we allways stand for it too, even if others are lost

Here are some book titles that might help.

My mom is great
What mommies do best
If you hold my hand
What moms can't do
Dinosaurs Divorce

Great titles LR

More books are on the way.....

Can anyone fix my broken heart
When mom and dad divorce
At daddy's on saturdays
It's not your fault Koko bear

Wow great titles for active little minds looking to cope

Thats cute the koko bear one lol

Mason.....how are you doing?

I am doing ok, thanks. Divorce process is moving along. Filing under adultery so POSOW will get a letter that I am suing her. Also, doing this so I will not be responsible for his debt througjhout the affair. That should sit well in their fantasyland. Staying in Plan B, which helps. Very nervous about what type of settlement I wiil be getting. I do not want to be forced to move.

I go through periods of accepting I am getting divorce to sadness and rage. I still ask why?

Have you gotten credit card records or whatever concerning his expenditures on her? That would help your case as far as your possibly getting saddled with any debt.

My attorney will request them. I have already told her that he is roughly 40K in debt. I am hoping we can settle that he keeps his and I keep mine. Who knows.

This will go on for quite a while, but will disapate with time.

There are probably many reasons and questions, as you sort through them, and put them in the past, maybe one at a time, maybe somewhere in a post found here on this forum, answers will come.

Make sure you take great care of yourself, and take positive action in your life for yourself, now that He is out of the picture and lost his place.

You have little ones that someday will know how much character you have, when Daddy did not.

Someday the fool will be revealed, it can't be helped, and it wasn't you

Thank you. Not having a great morning my 3 year old was talking about what he wished for, aside from Spider Man, he said he wants daddy to come back. Oh goodness.

I need to learn to stop asking the whys? Stop thinking about things when they were good. The last two years of my life has been hell. I just want to speed up the process of healing and the karma bus to run him over, like you said I want the fool to be revealed.

Just need to vent. Also found out my best friend who had been a huge support may be moving to London.

Remind yourself when you want to ask why, that you might as well be asking why the platypus exists, or something else ridiculous like that. There's no navigating the inner mind of a wayward, you can't figure out the why. (Well, selfishness, but...)

Take care of yourself and wait--the fool WILL be revealed.

OT I love your Sig karmarose. That is how I feel. I have come out the other side. I am the happiest I've been in so long I can't remember. I may not have a pot to piss in, he took that too, lol! But We, (kids and I) have a happy peaceful life. I wish the same for the OP.

Not having a great day, still in divorce limbo. Paperwork lost during the Hurricane had to refile. I feel like I am spinning today, WH is on vacation with OW and had the nerve to want to speak to me about negotitating the term of our divorce because he does not want to pay attorney fees. I refuse to speak with him.
I hate him more than ever. Plan B cracks always hurt. Now I am sad, he is vacationing and I am alone. I want the hurt to go away and feel indifferent towards him. I want this chapter in my life to be closed. most days are good, but when having a day like this it just brings back all of the pain.
They are moved on and I feel like I am stuck.
Still filing under adultery, he has no idea. I am sure that will go over well. Just needed to vent.

Hi Mason.Yes,plan B cracks always hurt!!Is there any way you could avoid even knowing his whereabouts?How did you find out about his vacations?The hurt will go away..eventually.You will feel indifferent towards him.You will detach completely when the time comes.Trust me.I was where you are months ago.The pain is still there but I can manage much better than before.
You are in my prayer.

I still snoop, have his frequent flier number, Old habits die hard. So yes, I can avoid it and will moving forward. Do not need to feel this way. Holidays are a trigger as well. Thank you!