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Jim Jones (a wayward) and the Peoples Temple and the mass suicide/murder in Guyana November 18th, 1978.

I remember hearing this unfold on tv and the mewspaper as a young child.


"Get busy living, or get busy dying"...... The Shawshank Redemption.
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HDW,

I am off today. I went this morning and worked out at the gym. I always have my phone just to be on this sIte. I don't get many phone calls and just mostly text. messages about the kids.

Tomorrow I Do work. Besides I can't go to Uchurch because of this order of protection.

KISS.

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HDW,

This is not the case I am trying. I am on here constantly, listening to the radio broadcasts trying to answer every question. some people you can't please no matter what you do or say. I wouldn't be here living on my phone and computer if I wasn't looking to improve myself and learn. What would I benefit from spending so much time here. ok so say I am "sighting" everyone! RQ is not a dumb woman actually she is pretty damn smart.sAve would see right through it. I want to learn and not be so thick headed.

Kiss

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I understand you work tomorrow.
Can you go to an evening Church service at another church?
Until this order is modified or lifted you will need to find another church to attend. I suggest you call the pastor of your current church and ask him to refer you to another church during this time.

Think of your mind, body and spirit and ways to feed and nourish each daily.

Right now your priority needs to be sleep

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I don't know of any church that do an evening mass around by me. I did go.to the movies with the kids today and my little guy sat on my lap just like every movie we have ever seen and I fell asleep for probably an hour. it was great holding him. it was the best hour of sleep since we got a hotel together and I got to good them all night.

KISS


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Kiss, the radio show tasks have been a good start. I have another for you to do as and when it comes up.

The opportunity to show good/poor boundaries is a choice we all come across from time to time.

As you practice good boundaries, tell us instances of where you avoided bad choices or situations.

I don't expect an instant response on this one, just watch for the opportunity to show good boundaries and post when you do for feedback.

Poor sleep is a natural response to situational depression, the important thing is to work on the situation - yourself.

Get medical advice and sleep/nap when you can. You have lots to do.


What would you do if you were not afraid?

"Fear is the little death. Fear is the mind-killer" Frank Herbert.

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Indiegirl,

just a quick one. We had a bad storm in new York and millions of people have no power and houses were washed away from the flooding NY City is devastated but the manager that i sent the text message to a month ago text me the night of the storm that see got home safe. I did not respond then 10 minutes later she text me that she was having some wine and going to bed also that she had no power. I never responded. I got to work the next day and she sent the same message to 5 other male managers. What frustrates me is that I told het not to text me unless its work related. nothing personal at all. Should I tell her again or just keep ignoring the text messages?


I'm am learning just please give me a chance. I might not be the quickest but I guarantee I'm dedicated to this program and my marriage recovery.

Last edited by kiss; 11/03/12 07:28 PM. Reason: spell check mistakes.
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You should BLOCK her number. You do not need to be texting her for anything.


One year becomes two, two years becomes five, five becomes ten and before you know it, you've wasted your whole life on a problem you can't solve. That's one way to spend your life. -rwinger

I will not spend my life this way.
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Originally Posted by kiss
Indiegirl,

just a quick one. We had a bad storm in new York and millions of people have no power and houses were washed away from the flooding NY City is devastated but the manager that i sent the text message to a month ago text me the night of the storm that see got home safe. I did not respond then 10 minutes later she text me that she was having some wine and going to bed also that she had no power. I never responded. I got to work the next day and she sent the same message to 5 other male managers. What frustrates me is that I told het not to text me unless its work related. nothing personal at all. Should I tell her again or just keep ignoring the text messages?


I'm am learning just please give me a chance. I might not be the quickest but I guarantee I'm dedicated to this program and my marriage recovery.
kiss,

With what you know about boundaries, what do you think you should do?

If a male manager was texting your wife the same message how would you want her to handle it?


FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.



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I agree with karma.
That is a personal boundary. We communicate our personal boundaries and then enforce as needed.

Regarding Mass, I didn't know you were Catholic.
I encourage you to consider joining a great group like the Knights of Columbus. You should also be explaining all of this to your priest. He can assist you. Reach out to the Church, she will help you.

You were married in the Church and marriage is a Sacrament. Is your priest involved in your marriage?

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Karmasrose,

I have to have her number for work. If their is an emergancy or an alarm issue we have to get in touch with each other. Also if we can't make it in we have to contact another manager to cover.

KISS

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And there are no male managers you can contact?


One year becomes two, two years becomes five, five becomes ten and before you know it, you've wasted your whole life on a problem you can't solve. That's one way to spend your life. -rwinger

I will not spend my life this way.
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Brainhurts,

I would want her to ignore them because they will get the picture. I have done this to other people and it does work.

KISS

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Karmasrose,

Their is one. In the store im in now their is only three of us.

KISS

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I am not catholic. I grew up in the Episcopal church and left when a gay priest came to our church. I got married in my wifes church witch is methodist. I have been going to church with my wife in a presbyterian church since last April. The priest that married us is not involved with us since the wedding.

KISS

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Originally Posted by kiss
Karmasrose,

I have to have her number for work. If their is an emergancy or an alarm issue we have to get in touch with each other. Also if we can't make it in we have to contact another manager to cover.

KISS

Then you contact a senior manager and complain that this woman is sending you private text messages after you have asked her to stop.

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Originally Posted by kiss
I am not catholic. I grew up in the Episcopal church and left when a gay priest came to our church. I got married in my wifes church witch is methodist. I have been going to church with my wife in a presbyterian church since last April. The priest that married us is not involved with us since the wedding.

KISS

I understand. Then I suggest you call the minister and ask him to refer you to another church. The church should be made aware Of your situation.
You may even find a room from a member.

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Ignoring those texts was a great start. Even if she diffused her stupidity by texting other managers, too, she's a walking train wreck. That was extremely inappropriate of her to do.

To report or not to report, that is the question. I think at this point a decent case could be made for either one. However, if (WHEN) she texts personal garbage again, I will be firmly on the side of reporting. If she is not stopped, sooner or later she will find someone with weak boundaries, and another family will be ruined.

This awful situation gives you a chance to be a friend of marriage and family.


A smooth sea never made a skilled mariner.
~ English proverb



Neak's Story
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Today I really tried to fucus on my boundries around my female associates. I am working on being more serious and not the joking fun manager that everyone likes. I'm not that mean angree manager but I don't have to be everyones best friend either.I need to think that my RQis next to me every interaction I have and also think what would she think if she was here.

It was different because everyone can tell that something is wrong with me. I have everyone ask me constantly if im ok that I seemed weird. Today I do feel better. I didn't go on my thread to much as I just tried to keep the mind focused on work. It worked most of the time.


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Sounds pretty good. I remember when I changed my boundaries and everyone thought I had changed, but people get used to it. I'm as well liked as I ever was today, but by better people who have good boundaries themselves.

I can always spot a married man with good boundaries and while I would never mention it, I admire it.

Its an adjustment. Keep going.


What would you do if you were not afraid?

"Fear is the little death. Fear is the mind-killer" Frank Herbert.

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