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Joined: Jun 2012
Posts: 71
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OP
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Joined: Jun 2012
Posts: 71 |
I agree with having no contact whatsoever ever but how do you go about it when the OW is his half sister? I believe he should never ever see her. She lives in a different country which help but I'm dreading the day his father dies. He want s to go to his country when his father dies and I get that but she is going to be there to. There would be no way to avoid it and frankly I don't want to see her, my kids don't want to see her either. I'll probably punch her lights out! Is it wrong for to require him not to go??
Me:BW 41
Serial cheater WH:44
Married for 21 years together 22
5 one time cheats,then
10 times with prostitutes
one night stand that turned 6 mo affair resulted in child 1992-1993
3 mo EA with half sister 3/2011 to 08/2011
they were physical 3 times in June
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Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 11,239
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Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 11,239 |
No it is not wrong.
It is required that he never see or speak to her again.
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Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 11,239
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Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 11,239 |
I know. That is what's scary. Thank God I've tested clean for everything. I would go into Plan B while you file for D. If he was to get into a program for Sexual addiction and you see progress maybe you would remarry. Dr. Harley says with addictions you need to separate. Please prepare for Plan B. How To Plan B properly Plan B letter samplesI think this was great advice offered to you previously. Did you follow any of it?
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Joined: Jun 2012
Posts: 71
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OP
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Joined: Jun 2012
Posts: 71 |
Haven't planned B. thinking real hard about it all. Holidays are coming so I just want the kids to have a good christmas. Don't want to be the cause of any pain for them this time of year.
Me:BW 41
Serial cheater WH:44
Married for 21 years together 22
5 one time cheats,then
10 times with prostitutes
one night stand that turned 6 mo affair resulted in child 1992-1993
3 mo EA with half sister 3/2011 to 08/2011
they were physical 3 times in June
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Joined: Mar 2012
Posts: 1,447
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Joined: Mar 2012
Posts: 1,447 |
Frenchie the A and WH behaviour is the reason for any pain you and your children suffer not Plan B. Plan B is to help you heal and recover. A healthy recovered mother benefits your children.
Me 46yrs
WH 46yrs "Isildur"
Married: 22yrs 8mths
DS 9yrs;DD 19yrs;DS 21yrs
Bomb drop:marriage not working don't know if ILY 12.11.11
DD:26.11.11
WH moves to OW house 28.11.11
Formal MB Plan A 14.4.12
Plan B 27.4.12
D:20.7.14
"There are moments in life that make us & set the course of who we become. Sometimes they're little & subtle,sometimes they're big & we never saw them coming. No one asks for their life to change, but it does. It's what we do afterwards that counts & we find out who we are."
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Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 10,179
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Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 10,179 |
It doesn't matter who dies. No Contact means just that - NO CONTACT.
Missing his father's funeral would be a SMALL SMALL price to pay for being given the chance to stay with you. If he was unwilling to pay it, don't waste your time trying to R. It won't happen until he's serious, and would do ANYTHING to fix what he broke.
A smooth sea never made a skilled mariner.
~ English proverb Neak's Story
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Joined: Dec 2007
Posts: 5,860
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Joined: Dec 2007
Posts: 5,860 |
NC is a conseqence of an affair.
Missing family functions because of NC is a consequence of the affair.
Why wait till his dad drops dead to see him?
Can WH has his dad come here for a visit while alive?
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Joined: Jun 2012
Posts: 71
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OP
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Joined: Jun 2012
Posts: 71 |
He is getting too sick to travel. He lives in Nicaragua so it's too far. I think him going there and spending the 3 months he did should be good enough after what happened. Not my fault he screwed it up
Me:BW 41
Serial cheater WH:44
Married for 21 years together 22
5 one time cheats,then
10 times with prostitutes
one night stand that turned 6 mo affair resulted in child 1992-1993
3 mo EA with half sister 3/2011 to 08/2011
they were physical 3 times in June
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Joined: Jun 2012
Posts: 71
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OP
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Joined: Jun 2012
Posts: 71 |
So much has happened. His dad has no passed. Will make a year this july. Hisband isnt cheatingnasnfar as i know but treats me kike crap one second and is a total a$$ the next. So frustrated. None of this has gotten better. I feel worse. I know thiz marriage needs to end
Me:BW 41
Serial cheater WH:44
Married for 21 years together 22
5 one time cheats,then
10 times with prostitutes
one night stand that turned 6 mo affair resulted in child 1992-1993
3 mo EA with half sister 3/2011 to 08/2011
they were physical 3 times in June
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Joined: Mar 2010
Posts: 7,362 Likes: 3
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Joined: Mar 2010
Posts: 7,362 Likes: 3 |
I would go into Plan B and file for a divorce.
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Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 11,239
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Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 11,239 |
Beauty school dropout...go back to high school.
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