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How do I make female friends?

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Take a cooking class.

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sign up with a running group

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Try to not be so mysterious crazy

Try a meet up group.


"Get busy living, or get busy dying"...... The Shawshank Redemption.
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This is entirely new because I never had female friends before.
Do men and women just be friends like going to coffee?

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I think I read you are involved in a church. Aren't there single women there?

Cooking class is great idea.

Single parent groups.

Divorce groups.

Tell your friends you want to broaden out and meet people. Make friends in general...the single female part will come.

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All those ideas are great. I agree with SW, the female part will come with trying anything new. I would be careful with only going in with the intention of friendship.

Women love to laugh, so be funny smile.


BW 35
WH 31
Married to a serial cheater
D Day - 9 times between June 2012 & April 2013
Plan B - April 13, 2013
Plan D - In the works
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I just thought of something Jedi, b/c I know we have talked about this way back ago. If you belong to a gym, take some of there classes that they have, kickboxing, spin, or whatever. They are usually full of women and the men tend to get extra attention b/c there is so few of them.


BW 35
WH 31
Married to a serial cheater
D Day - 9 times between June 2012 & April 2013
Plan B - April 13, 2013
Plan D - In the works
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Originally Posted by Jedi_Knight
How do I make female friends?
JK, I'd like to take a crack at this one. smile
It sounds to me like you are concerned a "friendship" will evolve into something more than what you intend.

So, from an MB perspective, perhaps you could use reverse engineering. How do we develop romantic relationships? We engage in intimate conversation, recreational companionship, affection (SF - which is already off the table) and try to spend 15 hours of undevided attention.

So, to me, if you can refrain from too much of any one or all of those concepts you could have a "friendship" that never got into the romantic realm.

[I would be concerned about physical attraction, though, as it is a powerful drug and can push the "love units" into a threshold (even though they are possibly fake love units). -- this is where dating and the concepts of stages like "infatuation" and "disillusionment" can be of particular interest. --maybe AGG would chime in on the topic sooner or later.]

opt


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My grandmother suggested I join parents Without Partners.
I went to their website and am attending an orientation meeting this Thursday

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You're not going to have any trouble meeting women. I'm quite confident of that. I thought you were wondering how to be "friends" with them.

I believe the religious based dating web sites ask preferences and beliefs -- like if you believe in premarital sex. You can focus your searches with that information.

opt


Me: 43 y.o. BFWH, D-day 11/11/09 (NC since 9/01)
Divorce from WW final 9/16/10.
Current Status: MB-based Marriage to Nature Girl 12/8/12 (first date on 12/11/10)
Mine: S(16), D(11)
NatureGirls: S(23), D(21)
Another EA Story
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Opt I don't know the line between friendship and dating
I've avoided women most of my married adult life.

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Why don't you go out and enjoy people, enjoy the human beings, regardless of the sex they are? Enjoy life, enjoy people!

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I think it is so cool that your grandmother is giving you advise on meeting people. Sounds like you have great family support.

As far as the line between friends and dating......it is friends until it is dating. smile

Be honest and keep your integrity. Also, do you have a list made of the top important traits you desire in a woman? It is important to get that list made before you start dating anyone, because you will be unduly influenced if you try to make the list while dating. Of course you don't show anyone the list....except us for discussion of course. wink


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Well I don't want to date yet.i just want to become friends with women as Harley recommended to a recent caller
I'm in NO position to date financially.

I'm afraid to make a list because I don't want to dye anyone with a personality disorder or untreated adult child of alcoholic.

I'm afraid that for some reason I am attracted to women with issues and I don't know why that is. I'm afraid that I dont know what a normal healthy woman is, and even then if she is normal and healthy won't she already be married? I also have 3 kids.

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All the more reason to make the list my friend.

And if you just want to meet people including women but you don't want to date yet, it is a good time period to tweak your list. As you observe women and even observe other marriages you will become familiar with what you find healthy and attractive.


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Originally Posted by Jedi_Knight
I'm afraid that for some reason I am attracted to women with issues and I don't know why that is. I'm afraid that I dont know what a normal healthy woman is, and even then if she is normal and healthy won't she already be married? I also have 3 kids.


I often think of this about myself and I think it could be true. You could be attracted to women with issues. All the more reason to make a list and stick to it. It's something that I know I will do in the future when I'm ready to start dating.

I hope not every man thinks that way about women. I won't be taken and I may stay single for a very long time, that doesn't make me unhealthy. It probably makes me more healthy.

Let us know what steps you take, it could be interesting.


BW 35
WH 31
Married to a serial cheater
D Day - 9 times between June 2012 & April 2013
Plan B - April 13, 2013
Plan D - In the works
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Well I went to a Parents Without Partners meeting...but nobody was there.
I called the number on the website but 2 days have passed and no return call. I think this may be a dead chapter with a website.

In the meantime I started a garden. In the last 2 days I've planted:
Abt 120 onions
100 carrots
16 tomato
45 lettuce
16 broccoli
16 spinach
16 cucumber
Parsley (about 20 ft row)
Lots of marigolds mixed in the rows
8 hot peppers
8 bell peppers
10 Hungarian peppers

And I'm now starting to dig up the back yard grass and plant corn and squash.

I may convert the entire back yard to garden

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Lord have mercy on you! That is going to be a lot of work, but so rewarding, you'll curse and love it at the same time!

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I had a bad, restless dream last night.
Ex ww was in the dream, asking about reconciliation.
I gave her the SAA book and she said she was willing to follow it.

I think reading about affairs on SAA caused this dream.

I know Dr Harley encourages men to plan A for years and yesterday's caller had plan A for nearly 2 years. Like yesterday's caller, whose wife left him for another woman, I would be too much of an emotional wreck to Plan A.

My short plan A was all I could do. When I listened to that caller, who lost 40 pounds, I thought "Plan A is insanity"

I thought "There is no way I would want to attempt any recovery because it's just too much emotional stress"




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