Well he wants to modify the custody because she wants to leave.
My wife also left.
I am a single parent of 3 kids.
Sometimes women leave and I just encourage you to be the best father possible, through well defined structure and safety for the kids.

Just sent in the email to the atty. They are gonna draft up the docs and send it to her council. My atty also says they haven't heard a peep out of hers for a while now. We'll see what happens.

Amazing seems we are in the same boat! Hope your fight for custody goes your way. Glad you have temp custody! What is your plan by the way? Pro marriage? Or flat out divorce?! Praying for your success at the moment your kids deserve you because your the only sane parent in this messed up equation! Also, I recommend you go back to your very first post and read it. There you will find the strength you discovered when you started to fight for your marriage the MB way. I did and I have alot of hindsight corrections but overall I am proud of the changes I made personally whether WW and I divorce or reconcile.

First to TD:
Thanks for the support. I am pro marriage all the way, but divorce is unavoidable in her eyes. I will continue to Plan A her for as long as I can tolerate it and not get walked all over, even after divorce. I've started a new hobby. I'm couponing to save money and am excited about it. I'm getting better at scheduling time and doing on my own all the chores required to run this household. I love the time I get to spend with my kids and doing new activities with them.


Now for the rest. I appologize if the following offends anyone, but I need to vent.
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I dropped of the kids this morning at my in-law's house to spend thier time with their mommy. She answered the door wearing just a robe, which irks me because we're divorcing and she should be more modest around me. I notice she has on a new ring. Rose gold with 3 marquis cut amethysts and 2 square cut diamonds/czs. She's wearing this ring on her wedding ring finger. My cheating wh*** of a wife is wearing a ring from her POSOM on her ring finger and we haven't even signed the final papers yet. Not only is she acting like a self-gratifying child, but she has the gaul to symbolize her dishonest sinful descent into moral oblivion with a such a disrespectful display. Such disregard for our family, children, and my emotions is outrageous. For the first time in my life I wanted to hit a woman. I wanted to slap her across the face and tell her to remove that sickening hunk of metal from her hand while in my presence. I'm ashamed of my reaction, but hope and pray and wish that she felt any shame for her egregious violation of our vows before God and all of our friends and family.

Ugh i'm so sick of feeling this way. I will persevere and see this through to the end for the sake of my children and because I stand for what is good and right under God's law, not the moral decay that our current cesspool of a society supports as right.

If you are reading this you are in doubt about what is right or wrong for you and your marriage; look inside your heart, listen to the voice of the Spirit, pray and know the truth. God loves marriage and hates divorce.

I feel the same way because POSOM proposed to my WW. She said no but who knows what's going on in affairville. You handled it correctly IMHO. There were and still are many times I wanted to grab my WW and shake some sense into her. Am I ashamed of feeling that way yes but I am proud that I didn't and you should be to. Dr. Harley says the pain a BS experiences is that of losing a child and I agree. Someone here can't remember who has a signature line stating if there was a medicine or shot to induce the pain and betrayal into a WS or would be WS so they can empathize with the hurt and sorrow they are/will inflict upon their family. Stay the course and if you can't there is always Plan B.

My WH came to pick me up at the hospital after I deliverd our 2nd dd wearing a beaded piece of junk on his ring finger. I had a really visceral reaction as well.. Wanted to chop his finger off. POSOW was going around claiming she was his wife as well. Waywards are cruel human beings... No they aren't human, they are aliens devoid of the ability to empathize and sympathize. Continue cleaning up your side and hopefully oneday soon WW will pull her head out of her @ss and realize the crap she is doing. Hipe you are taking care of yourself.

Thanks for letting me know what I'm feeling is normal. Some of the things that have come into my head in regards to POSOM have been down right sadistic and bordering on the sociopathic. I have never experienced rage and hatred as I have since all this crap hit the fan. Even after the first EAs and the 1st PA. I don't know what it is about this time. I think I know a little of what NP was talking about in his story when he held that crowbar. It's chilling to the mind, but feels right at the time.

I guess I finally got to a point where I can't stand it anymore and realized I need to stand up for what's right. I needed to stand up to her and not enable her. I know marriage is forever and even after we are divorced there will be that connection. I will make sure my soul is ready to answer for what I've done. I pity her and pray for her if she never wakes up.

Mijunleigh,

Rose gold with 3 marquis cut amethysts and 2 square cut diamonds/czs.

Sounds tacky and loud, the more gaudy the ring the faster the relationship will end.

God Bless
Gamma

I thought the same Gamma lol.

it really does look bad. If i can get a pic of it tomorrow I will. I'm gonna plaster it on FB. It really is hideous. She hasn't acknowleged it.

Speaking of tomorrow. I got her to agree to lunch with me and the kids. Tomorrow is her day with them, but my brother is getting married and I'm the best man so we need to drive about 3 hours to get to the rehearsal dinner. I'm thinking a picnic in the park if the weather is good. Chicken, fruit, some fresh baked cookies. Is there anything else I should bring? Any pointers? This will be the first time we speak for more than 2 minutes since she left at the beginning of March.

Here's one don't FB the pic lol. Keep the convo light and no relationship talk.

Light convo and relationship/legal/custody talk already on the avoid list. Note to self try to restrain myself on the FB post.

Lol. The ring is conspicuously absent, and miraculously she is wearing modest clothing and hiding her more prominent features. we'll see how the rest of the afternoon does.

Yesterday WW informed me that she would mow be representing herself in cout. I have mixedfeelings about this because she is now defenseless and it gives me huge advantage. But i also have tried really hard to keep the playing field even. I suppose i should look at this as another one if her consequences for poor judgment and immorality.

Today she said she would be going out.of state, likely beginning on father's day. Sbe's leaving for a week and wanted to know if i wanted to.have the kids go with or stay with me. Umm silly question, do i look like someone who wants my kids around an adulterous woman and her drug-using, loser of an AP for a week where they'll be exposed to God knows what kind of moral decrepitude?

Yes you need to look at as protecting your kids and yourself.

If we wants to represent herself and continue her affair, then these are consequences of her bad choices.

Have you done a background check on OM?

Yes keep the kids. You're documenting all of this, correct?

Yes the kids will certainly stay with me. I think we'll go on a vacation of our own. Why not if I'm taking the time off. Maybe go down and camp out on the beach, visit family and stuff.

It is so hard to keep myself in the mindset of a devoted and loving husband and at the same time to let go of her and let her fall on her face.

I did a background on the POS and he came up with multiple possession and paraphernalia charges and some speeding tickets and a public intoxication. I think he lost his license because of the speeding, drugs, and his failure to appear and then the trail just stops. Likely because he isn't driving anymore so no way to catch him with the garbage.

I document everything. Smartphones are amazing tools in divorce. I use an app called Divorce Log. It keeps everything in a calendar format. I can put in color coded notes for the dates things take place. I use my phone's voice recorder to grab all of our face to face conversations. I record all of our calls with another app. And I ported my old phone number to Google Voice and she calls and texts me on it. I have a time-stamped online record of every text message between us and she doesn't have my real number. I can cut her off completely with the click of a button.

I'm beginning to wonder what I should do for WW for mother's day. I've invited her to join us for church. I could do dinner for her and the kids. I've also toyed with the idea of giving her a candlelight massage like I used to. Don't know if she'll go for that though, might be too much too soon. Maybe just have it ready when we get home from a nice dinner or something. She has only just started joking with me again.

The kids only want to get her flowers, they can't think of anything else good to do for a girl. I'm gonna help them make some homemade cards to give her.

Does anybody have any other ideas or suggestions on what I've got so far.

Are you sure she's going to be celebrating with you and the kids? Will she be with OM?

She has made sure to ask to have the kids available for the day because Sunday is my day with them. My stance is for me to involve her in the day because it's Mother's day. Whether she's willing to go along with any of it remains to be seen. She may just ask to have them for the day and drop them off that night.

You're in Plan A until the D, correct?

Make plans and invite her along. Tell her it's your day, but you would love to have her join you. Then put on your best Plan A.