Welcome to the
Marriage Builders® Discussion Forum
This is a community where people come in search of marriage related support, answers, or encouragement. Also, information about the Marriage Builders principles can be found in the books available for sale in the Marriage Builders® Bookstore.
If you would like to join our guidance forum, please read the Announcement Forum for instructions, rules, & guidelines.
The members of this community are peers and not professionals. Professional coaching is available by clicking on the link titled Coaching Center at the top of this page.
We trust that you will find the Marriage Builders® Discussion Forum to be a helpful resource for you. We look forward to your participation.
Once you have reviewed all the FAQ, tech support and announcement information, if you still have problems that are not addressed, please e-mail the administrators at
mbrestored@gmail.com
|
|
|
|
Joined: Apr 2013
Posts: 5
Junior Member
|
|
Junior Member
Joined: Apr 2013
Posts: 5 |
I have been married 14 years to my wife and best friend. It has not always been great, we have many of the same problems lots of couples do. Money and shared household responsibilities. Most of our problems have been my fault but weve always worked them out. We have always been open And honest with each other and maybe to a fault. She has told me in the past she ha always wanted a threesome with another man. Recently we went on a work/ vacation trip together so i decided like an idiot to bring it up. I told her this would be the perfect opprotunity since we were out of town. We posted an ad on cl but had no results. When we got home she posted again on our local cl and she picked a guy out. We schesuled a night but the weekend before i had some trainimg for cub scouts over the weekend . Basicly they started talking and it has turned into an affair. I love my wife and would do anything to keep her. She says she still loves me she is just confused any advise would be helpful I am not ready to give up yet
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Oct 2011
Posts: 1,389
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Oct 2011
Posts: 1,389 |
Edward, I'm sure now you know what a dumb thing it was to enable this. It is rare for women to havee sex with a man and be emotionally unattached, we are not designed that way. Who is this man? What do you know about him? He is almost certainly married and your first task is to kill the affair.
Last edited by alis; 04/25/13 10:56 AM.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985 Likes: 1
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985 Likes: 1 |
How does pimping your wife out like an unpaid hoe demonstrate "love?"  I cannot think of anything more unloving and uncaring.
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Feb 2013
Posts: 315
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Feb 2013
Posts: 315 |
Of course she's confused... You endorsed the affair as long as you were in the room to watch and now you want her to stop. What's a girl to do with that kind of mixed message. 
Me - BH 49 years old
Her - WW 43 years old
Married 20 years
D Day Jan 7, 2013
3 kids - DS19, DS17, DS12
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Apr 2013
Posts: 5
Junior Member
|
|
Junior Member
Joined: Apr 2013
Posts: 5 |
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Apr 2013
Posts: 5
Junior Member
|
|
Junior Member
Joined: Apr 2013
Posts: 5 |
He is not married he is 26 we are 36 im just not sure how to stop the affair she has already told me she had told him it would not last. His response was he would not stop persuing the matter when she says its over. That is if anything she says can be believed now. I do trust her to an extent as we have always been open and honest with each other may be stupid of me i dunno
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985 Likes: 1
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985 Likes: 1 |
I would go to her and demand she end all contact immediately. You should also apologize for playing her pimp instead of her husbnad. Your next step should be to expose her affair. Please go read the links in the first thread in this forum titled "start here" and then come back and we can discuss next steps.
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Apr 2013
Posts: 5
Junior Member
|
|
Junior Member
Joined: Apr 2013
Posts: 5 |
He is not married he is 26 we are 36 im just not sure how to stop the affair she has already told me she had told him it would not last. His response was he would not stop persuing the matter when she says its over. That is if anything she says can be believed now. I do trust her to an extent as we have always been open and honest with each other may be stupid of me i dunno
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985 Likes: 1
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985 Likes: 1 |
I would go to her and demand she end all contact immediately. You should also apologize for playing her pimp instead of her husbnad. Your next step should be to expose her affair. Please go read the links in the first thread in this forum titled "start here" and then come back and we can discuss next steps.
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Feb 2012
Posts: 1,153
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Feb 2012
Posts: 1,153 |
Ed- wow. Your story is very disturbing. You can't turn back the clock but you can look forward.
�Babe I love you. I realize now what we did was horribly wrong. It was a huge mistake and we should have never followed through on this. It has hurt me deeply. I regret not being the loving husband you deserve. I have found a program (MB) that can help us create an amazing marriage. It teaches how we can create an integrated lifestyle where both of our needs are fully fulfilled EXCLUSIEVELY by each other. I want nothing more than for us to have an amazing marriage together. Would you be willing to explore this program with me?�
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Apr 2013
Posts: 5
Junior Member
|
|
Junior Member
Joined: Apr 2013
Posts: 5 |
Right now she isnt willing ro look at any books or go to any counciling
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985 Likes: 1
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985 Likes: 1 |
I would go to her and demand she end all contact immediately. You should also apologize for playing her pimp instead of her husbnad. Your next step should be to expose her affair. Please go read the links in the first thread in this forum titled "start here" and then come back and we can discuss next steps.
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 20,481 Likes: 6
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 20,481 Likes: 6 |
Right now she isnt willing ro look at any books or go to any counciling Have you read these? Start Here First-Welcome Aboard
FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.
|
|
|
Moderated by Ariel, BerlinMB, Denali, Fordude, IrishGreen, MBeliever, MBsurvivor, MBSync, McLovin, Mizar, PhoenixMB, Toujours
|
0 members (),
147
guests, and
46
robots. |
|
Key:
Admin,
Global Mod,
Mod
|
|
|
Forums67
Topics133,659
Posts2,323,613
Members72,372
| |
Most Online9,682
May 13th, 2026
|
|
|
|
|
|
