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Joined: Mar 2010
Posts: 7,362 Likes: 3
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Joined: Mar 2010
Posts: 7,362 Likes: 3 |
Great  Are you going to invest in the biometer? When my husband Markos first bought his, it was a very VISIBLE sign to me that he was not only willing, but also actively working on eliminating his anger all together. He carried it around with him everywhere for awhile. This is an action that can speak louder than words.
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Joined: Mar 2013
Posts: 249
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OP
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Joined: Mar 2013
Posts: 249 |
At this point I dont think she cares. But for me its a great way to practice on how to control myself in areas outside of my marriage.
Married for 3 years
And going through a seperation.
me bh 33
her ww 34
2 kids
her dd 14
my ds 8
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Joined: Mar 2013
Posts: 249
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OP
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Joined: Mar 2013
Posts: 249 |
I just went to court and things look hopeful on my side I want to thank you guys and hope everything goes good for the bs's like me and even though things look like a big hole this forum does give you a shovel to dig your self out. The choice is yours to use it or not but I think I am going to use the tool to help myself.
Married for 3 years
And going through a seperation.
me bh 33
her ww 34
2 kids
her dd 14
my ds 8
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Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 20,439 Likes: 4
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Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 20,439 Likes: 4 |
I just went to court and things look hopeful on my side I want to thank you guys and hope everything goes good for the bs's like me and even though things look like a big hole this forum does give you a shovel to dig your self out. The choice is yours to use it or not but I think I am going to use the tool to help myself. 
FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.
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Joined: Mar 2013
Posts: 249
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OP
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Joined: Mar 2013
Posts: 249 |
Not much to update on my marriage other then I paid my half of car insurance like I said I would even though I think I paid a little more. I check tomorrow if she owes I might have to pay the rest. And other news I did help talk a friend / coworker out of a affair so I feel warm and fuzzy about that.
Married for 3 years
And going through a seperation.
me bh 33
her ww 34
2 kids
her dd 14
my ds 8
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Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 20,439 Likes: 4
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Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 20,439 Likes: 4 |
Not much to update on my marriage other then I paid my half of car insurance like I said I would even though I think I paid a little more. I check tomorrow if she owes I might have to pay the rest. And other news I did help talk a friend / coworker out of a affair so I feel warm and fuzzy about that. What you mean you talked them out of it? Do they still talk or see the other person? What Have they done to change all avenues that allowed the affair to almost happen?
FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.
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Joined: Mar 2013
Posts: 249
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OP
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Joined: Mar 2013
Posts: 249 |
Just basically told him that for a selfish act he would hurt his kids. And he told me he texted her that he wanted to work things out with his wife
I told him to check this site out.
Married for 3 years
And going through a seperation.
me bh 33
her ww 34
2 kids
her dd 14
my ds 8
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Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 20,439 Likes: 4
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Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 20,439 Likes: 4 |
Just basically told him that for a selfish act he would hurt his kids. And he told me he texted her that he wanted to work things out with his wife
I told him to check this site out. Good job. I hope they get help.
FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.
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Joined: Mar 2013
Posts: 249
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OP
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Joined: Mar 2013
Posts: 249 |
Me too im just glad that trying to do the right thing is still around.
Married for 3 years
And going through a seperation.
me bh 33
her ww 34
2 kids
her dd 14
my ds 8
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Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 11,239
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Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 11,239 |
If your friend is about to have an affair you should tell his wife.
He may have texted the ow that he wants to work on his marriage but ow doesn't care and they will keep texting and maintain contact "as friends".
He's probably in the fog and his wife needs to know
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Joined: Mar 2013
Posts: 249
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OP
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Joined: Mar 2013
Posts: 249 |
Thank you for your advice. From a friends perspective what would the fog babble sound like?
Married for 3 years
And going through a seperation.
me bh 33
her ww 34
2 kids
her dd 14
my ds 8
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Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 20,439 Likes: 4
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Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 20,439 Likes: 4 |
Thank you for your advice. From a friends perspective what would the fog babble sound like? Wayward Fog is all the same. Do you know who this OW is? Coworker?Facebook? Ask your friend "are you going to let your BW know about this OW so you can work on your marriage?" If/when he says anything other than "I already did". Then you know he's in the fog. The BW needs to be told.
FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.
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Joined: Mar 2013
Posts: 249
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OP
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Joined: Mar 2013
Posts: 249 |
Yeah he said he already did. And the only thing he talks about is his dates with his wife. Thats why I asked I dont know anything about the ow other then he called her mohawk chick. I also know he told his wife that he smoked and she did not know about that. Now he doesnt wear latex gloves to smoke.
Last edited by Chitenator; 05/10/13 12:20 PM.
Married for 3 years
And going through a seperation.
me bh 33
her ww 34
2 kids
her dd 14
my ds 8
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Joined: Mar 2013
Posts: 249
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OP
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Joined: Mar 2013
Posts: 249 |
Well I have been reading love busters book and thank good I am willing to read. I hate reading books but I love to read forums and anything informational. But thank you guys. I am on the angry out burst chapter.
Married for 3 years
And going through a seperation.
me bh 33
her ww 34
2 kids
her dd 14
my ds 8
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Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 20,439 Likes: 4
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Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 20,439 Likes: 4 |
I was finding this thread for another poster and thought of you also. jah's Thread
FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.
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Joined: Oct 2011
Posts: 395
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Joined: Oct 2011
Posts: 395 |
I also know he told his wife that he smoked and she did not know about that. Now he doesnt wear latex gloves to smoke. Unless she's a smoker herself she knew and wearing gloves to conceal his smoking just shows he's out of touch with reality.
Me 58: FWH (NC 32 yr), W 60, married 36 yr, DD 32
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Joined: Mar 2013
Posts: 249
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OP
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Joined: Mar 2013
Posts: 249 |
Well I just think that cool for him to tell the truth but right now I have to help myself first before I can help others.
Married for 3 years
And going through a seperation.
me bh 33
her ww 34
2 kids
her dd 14
my ds 8
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Joined: Mar 2013
Posts: 249
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OP
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Joined: Mar 2013
Posts: 249 |
If that makes any sense I told him to check this sight out and told him about thethe concepts but I am in no condition to try and save someone elses marriage if mine is in danger.
Married for 3 years
And going through a seperation.
me bh 33
her ww 34
2 kids
her dd 14
my ds 8
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Joined: Mar 2013
Posts: 249
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OP
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Joined: Mar 2013
Posts: 249 |
Thanks for the link brain hurts but funny thing is i was already reading that thread. I just talked to sd and I am worried about her. I am glad I will take her bowling tomorrow but still. Her grades have fallen badly and she tells me her mother is not paying attention to her and would rather be with om. I really think depression has hit her and I pray to god that she has not started to cut herself again. Go figure I am athiest.
Married for 3 years
And going through a seperation.
me bh 33
her ww 34
2 kids
her dd 14
my ds 8
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Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 20,439 Likes: 4
Member
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Member
Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 20,439 Likes: 4 |
Thanks for the link brain hurts but funny thing is i was already reading that thread. I just talked to sd and I am worried about her. I am glad I will take her bowling tomorrow but still. Her grades have fallen badly and she tells me her mother is not paying attention to her and would rather be with om. I really think depression has hit her and I pray to god that she has not started to cut herself again. Go figure I am athiest. Poor SDD. Can you do things with her, since her mom won't? Or with your sister and/or mother?
FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.
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