I don't really know where to start.. I have been married for only a year and a half but it feels like I have a lifetime of problems during this time. I have known my husband for years and we dated for 3.5 years before getting married. It seems the day we got married our problems began. I found out that he was (may still be) addicted to pain pills. This is something that he had kept from me until about 3 months into our marriage. This is because he had spent ALL of our savings and didn't know what else to do. I took this as something that we could work on and get past. During these three months I didn't know he was taking pills he wrote cold checks all over town (Even some old checks that I had before we got married on a closed account). I paid all these checks off but he still had to go to court over some. He spent a couple weeks in jail and had to go back to court last week. He didn't go so he will be going back to jail. He is verbally abusive on a daily basis and has been physical before (choking me and throwing me around). I have moved out but I still give him money and deal with his verbal abuse. I cannot let go of him and I don't know why. I feel like I am the crazy one for dealing with this. He will talk down to me one minute and the next time he calls he will be super nice. What is wrong with me? I ask myself if this is normal and something that I just need to deal with?!

No. You absolutely should not deal with abuse. Dr. Harley recommends separation for a year and reconciling only after the abuser has gone through an intensive program for a users.

Welcome to MB.

I don't know how familiar you are with Dr. Harley's work, but please read these.

When to Call it Quits #2
Abusive Marriage #5