Indie, thank you for trying to stick up for me. I will say this though, I don't deserve that. I did go against everything that I had stood for. I did it through small steps, much the same as a wayward, although I do not in fact consider myself to be in an affair, as both my, and my boyfriend's marriages were already ended, with excaption of a divorce. I am NOT making excuses. And ITA that by not following DrH's advice, I have actually given myself a very slim chance at success with this new relationship. I do agree that we have entered into this as Renters.
In my marriage, I was a Buyer, complete and total. Part of Plan B is actually to change a Buyer into a Renter in the marriage to be able to consider the chance of moving on.
I had NO intention of going to a chatroom to find someone. I even had boundaries up while I was in there, ie No PMs, but it seemed that I craved attention, and didn't have my boundaries up as high as I should have. I should have gotten a divorce before I started a relationship. I would not condone anyone dating while they are married, Period. That being said, I am. And not only am I, my actions have directly impacted my chances at a long term happy relationship built on Romantic Love.
These reasons, and these reasons alone are what have caused me to no longer post on MB. I do not feel like I can give out advice on a Forum when I am not following one of the most important parts, which is to not date while married.
I do not want this to become a distraction to any of the help that is offered on this site. I believe in MB fully and completely and I have experienced how well it works, when you actually do follow the guidlines.
Although I have not followed MB in the past 8 months, I do acknowledge that I followed MB to a T for more than 3 years, and it saved me. I hope this thread can still be useful to others who are trying to impliment a proper Plan B, and I hope I can also be an example as to what will happen if you do NOT keep those boundaries up.
In closing, I believe that MB and DrH's principles are the best way to ensure a successful marriage.
