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Yes. He was on short term disability for a while while he was in the hospital this past Sept-October and for several weeks after he was discharged from the hospital. He was out of the office for 14 weeks? He just returned to work Dec 19th.
Last edited by Fancy; 01/11/14 11:33 PM.
Me: 32, BW, 22 weeks pregnant
Him: 32, WH recently diagnosed with Bipolar
Together 11 years
Married 6 years
DD: 3 years old
D-Day: 11/8/2013
NC Letter: 12/2/2013 failed
Plan B: 12/9/13-current
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My best friend, Christine, who is the OW's SIL, texted me and asked if WH had been out Friday night. Okay, this makes sense that you heard it from your friend while you were not in Plan B - seeing if your WH would do the EP's. He's not in it for the right reasons yet. I agree with you. Your WH is only sorry that he got caught. He's not sorry for the behavior yet. Dr. Harley and Joyce are so sweet. Let us know when you hear from them.
W (me) - 40
H - 44
M 15 years, 2 kids
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Now he's crying to IM saying he knows he made a huge mistake Your IM needs to protect you from this information. She should only be passing on information about the kids or finances. If he expresses to her his desire to reconcile with you, she should tell him to contact Dr. HARLEY on the radio show and ask him what to do, and she shouldn't tell you a thing about it.
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Fancy, I just heard your letter read on the radio show.
Did you tell Dr. Harley that the reason you are in Plan B is not only because you are pregnant, but also because your husband was waffling on following EPs? It sounded like Dr. Harley wasn't aware of this, and assumed your husband was doing everything he could and just slipped up ...
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Yes, I explained everything in the letter in detail. Joyce paraphrased my situation.
But from what I gathered, relapses are expected and I'm to put in more EPs to prevent further contact if he can't refrain from contacting her.
But he needs to be honest about contacts or if he's feeling an urge to contact.
And Dr Harley also said he would understand if I decided to divorce him at this point since it's too stressful and since he's betrayed me again.
Joyce and Dr Harley talked about me being the only one to judge whether I decided to try to reconcile or divorce since I'm the only one that knows my whole situation. I'm trying to figure it out. Need some time alone.
Last edited by Fancy; 01/15/14 11:01 PM.
Me: 32, BW, 22 weeks pregnant
Him: 32, WH recently diagnosed with Bipolar
Together 11 years
Married 6 years
DD: 3 years old
D-Day: 11/8/2013
NC Letter: 12/2/2013 failed
Plan B: 12/9/13-current
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Posts: 7,362 Likes: 3
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Take your time. There is no need to rush to a decision about reconciliation.
Dr. Harley talked about moving, and seemed to think it would be the only way to keep him from contacting her. Is that something he would be willing to do?
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I don't think moving is a real option for us right now with me being pregnant and honestly our entire support system is here. With his mental illness being a new diagnosis and us still navigating that aspect, I would not want to move away and handle that all on my own. It was a traumatic experience to deal with the mania.
Me: 32, BW, 22 weeks pregnant
Him: 32, WH recently diagnosed with Bipolar
Together 11 years
Married 6 years
DD: 3 years old
D-Day: 11/8/2013
NC Letter: 12/2/2013 failed
Plan B: 12/9/13-current
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Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 11,239
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Well, that's the problem with infidelity.
If you want to recover you often need to move
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I don't think moving is a real option for us right now with me being pregnant and honestly our entire support system is here. With his mental illness being a new diagnosis and us still navigating that aspect, I would not want to move away and handle that all on my own. It was a traumatic experience to deal with the mania. You choose what is best for you and your babies. Your health is extremely important right now. Moving would be very hard on you during your pregnancy. Take plenty of time making your choice. If you want to "bounce" stuff off any of us here, I know many of us are anxious to help out. Take care.
W (me) - 40
H - 44
M 15 years, 2 kids
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