Plan B is going to the gym, painting your nails and finding a good movie to watch. Not caring what your alien husband is thinking and doing. Start practising and it will get easier. It is very difficult in the beginning.

Maybe redecorating the house will keep you busy

Your H has to be moved out for you to be in Plan B. Plan B is no contact with him unless it relates to your children together, like visitation or a medical emergency. Has your H moved out yet, or have you moved out?

Weeks ago you were encouraged to Plan B.
Yet you insisted on keeping him in the home.
Plan B is NO CONTACT.
Have you read anything about Plan B?

Ok- so here is where things are:

Husband moving out on 2/1. Court date for financial support is schedule for feb.

In the meantime....husband is snappish, sarcastic and just not nice.
To me or the kids. He barely speaks to us. Not even a hi or bye. I understand if he is upset with me, not justified, but he can be mad at me if he wants, but why does he distance himself from the kids??

My son (16) told me yesterday that he knows my husband texts this OW while they are together at the gym or lunch. He feel so upset and disrespected that his dad would do it in front of him...

I guess he is in the affair fog and maybe that explains some of this as it seems he can't do/think about anything but the OW.

Do they always get out of the fog? And is there any chance at all they can make the relationship work since we are divorcing and they can be free to move forward in a relationship? I know I shouldn't be concerned about this, but please want ur thoughts on this....

Most affairs die a natural death within 6 months of exposure.
Typically they often die faster in Plan B because then the affaires must rely on each other to meet all of their emotional needs.

There are many former cheaters in these forums that came out of the fog.

He has become a bear! Either barking/growling at someone or ignoring them.

He is divorcing me, not his kids and he is just making them not want to be around him and they are getting angry and hurt.

This OW is taking all of his good energy and leaving all the bad behind.
Seems she is all that matters to him. His cell phone is never out of his hand.

If the kids don't want to be around him, he has no one to blame but himself.

I hope the next 11 days go quickly and peacefully for you and your children.

When my DD was very upset with kiss' affair, she wrote him a letter about how hurt she was and how she hoped his head would clear and that he would see the jury he was doing to the family. Perhaps, your kids would want to "spill it" too?

See the *hurt. My phone auto corrected that to jury for some reason!

Yes....his "taker" is in full control and that is why you have been advised to see an attorney and enter plan B weeks ago......because in his state of mind selfishness rules.

My wife abandoned her kids for her affair partner! She literally gave up everything!
Dr Harley would encourage you to be honest with your kids and explain that his lack of care is because he is choosing another woman over his family

Ok- question...

Husband wanted divorce, having affair, etc...I filed, yet he is mad, angry and upset with me!!??

He is getting what he wanted, why the anger????

Because he's used to his needs being met by two women. That's is all

Well - shame on him for "begging" for a divorce, claiming to have regretted getting married to me 21 years ago and then getting upset when I call his bluff and actually file!!

Did he think I would continue to meet his needs after all tht??

Lacole;
You are trying to make sense out of the words of a wayward.
IF your WH ever gets himself out of the fog, he won't believe the things he said to you during this time. I know this because that is how it is w/ my fWH. And every other former wayward spouse here...

So, stop listening to him. Stop thinking what he says should make sense.

YOU have chosen to not have him leave until the end of the month (which is 6 to 7 WEEKS after you were first advised to do so by the posters on this forum. Granted, it is your life, your choice.

Legally, in my state, I could not force him to leave. Unless it was a physically abusive situation. I asked two lawyers, was told the same by both.

I could change the locks, but then would be forced to let him back in.
No was going to leave.

My choice?? Not really, just doing my best with what I have.

Do they always come out of the fog at some point??

Not always. Especially not while the A continues.
You see, the fog is REQUIRED in order for them not to feel the hurt and devastation they are causing.

From what I read, I agree, def not while the A continues.

But from what I have read the A will end at some point...
Do they then realize how foolish they were or can an A end without the realization??

They (esp. he) won't realize it for a while after the A ends. It takes a while for the fog to clear. And for the justifications to settle out. Or, if he is a very entitled sort of person, given to serial cheating, he may just pop into another A.