There's something that reverberates in my head when I think about everything. When I was at my house after catching the POSOM there being all comfortable on my sofa watching my movie with my wife, I asked her WHY she did what she did. Her response was "Because he paid attention to me." I asked her why she married me in the first place if she was going to destroy our family, and her response was "Because YOU paid attention to me." I thought it was an oversimplified answer, and I still don't think there is any justification for adultery and divorce, especially when one spouse does virtually nothing to save the marriage when it gets to critical mass. But in the grand scheme of things she probably summed up her needs pretty well in that one sentence.

I should have been in Plan A all along. I should never have taken my friend's advice, and he kept insisting that he was right. Well, that might have worked for him, but it was disastrous for me. My ex wife is not his wife and I am not him. Incidentally, he blew me off a few months ago and I haven't really spoken to him. Sad that someone who professes to be a Christian can do that and feel good about themselves. Just because I pushed back on his advice that wasn't working. I think he is right in what *I* needed to do for myself, but to be in Plan B was the opposite of what I needed. I don't know that I was even capable in the beginning, to be honest.

The one-year anniversary of that date is approaching - February 28 - and she is still seeing this parasite. She is essentially in a Plan B scenario with me these days. I texted her because I forgot the girls' coats at my house and she hasn't responded. I think that I need to do what I can to expedite the POSOM's retreat and do an active Plan A. For now all I can do is be nice and try to make her see that I am not the loser that she thinks I am. She still has a restraining/no-contact order she can wield if she wanted to get rid of me if I get too friendly.

Wait.....I forgot there was a restraining order.
Can you post the wording of it?
Dr Harley would encourage you to follow any court order

How'd she get one? Were you violent?

It's somewhere - I'd have to find it. As far as I know it has no expiration. I have been to the house, though. Last halloween I took the girls trick or treating and walked them up to the door.

Sorry, I missed this post last night.

No, not at all. In fact, I was the opposite. I raised my voice at one point but the girls didn't even wake up. I went into my own house and caught the POSOM there with her.

How did she get a restraining order? She hired a lawyer and he requested it. New Mexico is notoriously pro-woman in family court.

A little story about a friend of a friend. This guy's wife cheated on him, then assaulted HIM. He went in front of a (woman) judge and got a restraining order against her and custody of their kids. Later that SAME DAY she had a scheduled appearance in front of the SAME JUDGE and that judge granted HER custody of the kids. She immediately fled to Arizona and this guy had to quit his job and move just to see them.

So.. don't be surprised that my xW got what she wanted.

Post the wording of it please

Ben a very long week so far. Haven't had time to do anything yet.

More complaining. Ready?

Allergies kicked my butt all week, can barely work. Lifted a heavy box at work today to help move some stuff around, and discovered that I now have the beginnings of an umbilical hernia. No health insurance. This life just keeps getting better and better. I wonder what is next. My guess? [censored] cancer..

Picked the girls up today, xW said nothing, barely looked at me. When she got back into her car she immediately began to furiously text someone (I wonder who) as though she were a teenager.

I am in Plan A why, again? Can someone remind me?

If you we're injured on the job that would be a workman's compensation matter. Your employer or their insurance are responsible

I'm a contractor. Not sure if those rules apply to me.

Can you get Medicaid?

I don't think so. I make too much at this job. I emailed the person I am contracted with to see what my options are since it happened at work.

Thats good you documented that it happened on the job.
Your ex wife may have heard from her boyfriend....maybe he's upset that he's posted on an international cheater site

Yeah I have heard nothing about that. Only 15,400 people have seen his cheating face so far.

More will see it.
Cheaterville has top google ratings.
Anyone that searches for him will find it

I need his family and friends to see it.

Maybe someone could anonymously message his Facebook friends with a link.

Did you expect anything different?

Quit whining, because that attitude gets sensed, even if you don't tell her.

You have expectations for her to change, but you only have control over yourself, so start and continue there.

Expectations are nothing but premeditated resentments.

LTL

If you post him on www.playerblock.com , you can post his phone number and the website will send him a text message to let him know he is registered as a cheater.

Also, Cheaterville allows you to anonymously email his report to anyone. Click on his cheaterville profile and type in the addresses you want to email to

Jedi,

At what point does continuing to further enhance the cheaterville and playerblock exposures serve any additional purpose?

I feel BSNM needs to learn to accept the situation as is, which is legally divorced, yet for the first time in this entire ordeal, learn how to Plan A his XW.

This continual harping about these sites, especially since he already posted the OM onto them just fans his flames of resentment it seems.

Would better mentoring him on properly thinking and doing Plan A be a better use of time and efforts, if he willingly obliges to follow the lessons provided?

LTL

I feel the same way, to be honest, but on the other hand, a Plan A will be ineffective as long as their affair continues. It is a double-edged sword, in my opinion. I feel like I need to do something to assist in ending their affair, but do so discreetly.