Remain in plan B, try not to focus on your husbands actions

Thanks Jedi. this round of exposure covered almost 30 friends. and my WH's response to them is an email with maybe twenty sth. bullet points of darkest moments of our past 15 years, and quoting me or someone out of context to defame me. one thing you guys warned me earlier is about my MIL. it really backefired on me this time. MIL passed on the private conversation i had with her to ask her to give some pressure to her son. She was reluctant at the time, and she's mad that i got too many ppl involved. that conversation got pretty emotional and didn't go well. now obviously she told WH the whole thing, and WH quoted me out of context and made me look like the unappreciative and abusive DIL. i think someone with poor psychological endurance might have suicidal thoughts from the email. he bcc-ed everyone and my friends warned me about the letter. but when one of my friend actually forwarded me the email, i was soooooo angry and hurt. but luckily, the exposure also brought lots more support and care. after talking to a couple friends, i felt much better. i think i'm pretty much done about exposure. and WH's email gave me the strongest motivation to get out of here ASAP!!!

Slander is common with these cases.

Just a few days ago, my ex wife posted online that I raped her and neglected her. The list was much longer but the rape accusation upset me because (1) its a lie and (2) its falsely accusing me of a felony crime.

We were divorced 2 years ago! I had to divorce her because she refused to end her affair. She left our family to live with OM (whom she still lives with)...yet now tries to portray it as her struggle to leave an abusive marriage!

Learn a lesson from me: Get out while the going is good! Leave while you can! When they are deep in the affair they will usually sacrifice everything, including kids, for the affair....but after the affair starts to crumble they will try to get the kids back.

If you dont leave soon, you may be unable to leave.

Also, I found most of my wayward wife's family to be useless in battling the affair.
Most of them listened to her wayward excuses

to my big surprise is that my SIL, herself was a BW and got divorced several years ago. she even believed WH's story about suffering years and years from the horrible marriage, let alone my MIL, supported divorce twice. Then none of them could explain, why given such a bad marriage, we tried to have a kid, then followed by the second one.

Sorry Jedi you have to go through these, even after you guys got divorced.

i'm really scared if i'm stuck here forever. he's a different person now, and he's capable of doing all the nasty stuff. i'm really torn here. i wish i could just leave without a job!!! but i never ever took such risk before. really hope i could have some luck on the job hunting.

Also, just like the other thread, most of my friends are thinking i'm crazy still trying to save the marriage given the way he is treating me.

i guess i can't do pity party anymore... had a very very down day today. just can't hold myself together during the parent teacher conference this morning. this is really difficult. but to my comfort, DD is doing really great at school, so proud of her. and her 4-year-old check-up also turned out all good!

i'll try to shut out all the negative stuff as much as possible.

shall i pass on DD's 4-year-old checkup result to IM?

My wife left and I became a single dad...this is what I do:
The bare minimum as required by law.
So, since you don't have court orders, I would send nothing to him.
This is also consistent with Plan B...

Your friends are concerned for your well being and dont want to see you hurt.
I think Harley would encourage you to ask them not to talk about your marriage or husband anymore and explain to them that you want to focus on yourself and your kids for now.
Every conversation involving your husband causes stress

Did he ask for it?

How much time is he seeing the children?

Thanks Jedi. I asked my friend not to talk about him anymore. I will not discuss anything other than taking care of the kids with MIL either. I felt a lot of hurt and anger toward her and WH. I treated her so nice, and she just went on pass on my conversation to her son and she or WH twisted my words and quoted me out of context. I'm so angry that I want to sue WH for slander.

I made appointment with a psychiatrist to get ADs, but it's after 3 weeks. I really need sth. to even my emotions now. otherwise i won't be able to accomplish anything here.

Thanks BH.

NOT yet.

His visitations are TUE and THU 4:30pm - 9 pm, SAT 3pm - 9pm.

Ok. I will send him nothing unless he asks for it. Thanks, Jedi!

Then don't send it to him.

How are you handling the drop offs and pick ups?

WH picks up DD from daycare TUE / THU. SATs picks up both ones from home, MIL helps carry the 6month old in and out of apt. DD walks in and out herself. I'm either not home, or hiding in another room. I try to avoid see him.

Hi guys, i have a question regarding taking ADs. Will the fact that i'm taking ADs cause any problem on my child custody? are there any past cases that divorce lawyers using that against the spouse taking ADs?

My psychiatrist has a cancellation today, so i got in. Prescribed Wellbutrin. But i'm not sure if i should take it.

I haven't heard of ADs causing problems on custody.

Dr. Harley recommends Wellbutrin also. Please take it. It should help you feel more clear and not stress as much. I trust that Dr. Harley wouldn't prescribe ADs if it would hurt anyone.

Thanks BH. Yeah, I asked around here about ADs then got recommended Wellbutrin, then i mentioned it to my psychiatrist.

Good. Are you going to take them?

You sound so much more calm since you've gone into a real Plan B. Any more news on moving to CA?