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Joined: Sep 2014
Posts: 27
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OP
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Joined: Sep 2014
Posts: 27 |
Our child together and 3 years old.
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Joined: Sep 2014
Posts: 27
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OP
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Joined: Sep 2014
Posts: 27 |
Perhaps I should explain what is going on better. It was not all that long ago I felt certain it was over, never meant to be in the first place, etc. Maybe a week or so ago I felt changed like something was pushing me to try just this one last time. I'm sure its a waste but I feel compelled to do my best. So I am trying to be her friend despite all the heartache. I think it is probably the calm before the storm.
I had been telling myself to hate her and spent the better part of 2014 convincing myself that I did. Now I am forced to deal with the realization that I in fact still love her deeply and its tearing me apart. I just take one day at a time but after so many sleepless nights it becomes more difficult.
I also have to come to grips with the fact that I was a crappy husband and probably drove her to cheat. What a great new year. Anyways it helps to vent so thank you to anyone that is listening.
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Joined: Jul 2014
Posts: 863
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Joined: Jul 2014
Posts: 863 |
Did you expose the affair? Are divorce proceedings underway? Exposing the affair is the very first step. You say you want to try, but did you ever start?
Remarried 7/16
Thanks MB!
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Joined: Sep 2014
Posts: 27
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OP
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Joined: Sep 2014
Posts: 27 |
I did. I told her parents and most of our joint friends. Didn't make a difference. She is officially in "love" with him.
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Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985 Likes: 1
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Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985 Likes: 1 |
I did. I told her parents and most of our joint friends. Didn't make a difference. She is officially in "love" with him. Did you expose to the OM's wife and his family as we instructed?
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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Joined: Sep 2014
Posts: 27
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Joined: Sep 2014
Posts: 27 |
No I didn't see the point. They are in the end stages of their own divorce and she already has someone else in her life. And there's the whole problem of finding a way to contact her.
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Joined: Jul 2014
Posts: 863
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Joined: Jul 2014
Posts: 863 |
Did you post him on Cheaterville?
Remarried 7/16
Thanks MB!
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Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985 Likes: 1
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Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985 Likes: 1 |
No I didn't see the point. They are in the end stages of their own divorce and she already has someone else in her life. And there's the whole problem of finding a way to contact her. Then you should start there. We don't really care if you "see the point"or not. Your best thinking destroyed your marriage, so you don't know what you are doing. If you want help here, you are gong to have to start taking the advice. Don't waste our valuable time.
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985 Likes: 1
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Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985 Likes: 1 |
And there's the whole problem of finding a way to contact her. You need to get off your butt and find her.
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 20,438 Likes: 4
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Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 20,438 Likes: 4 |
And there's the whole problem of finding a way to contact her. You need to get off your butt and find her. ^^^^ yes. You have OM's name, correct? So many ways to find her information.
FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.
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