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Joined: Dec 2014
Posts: 5
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Four months ago I found out my husband had been exchanging explicit text with another women. When confronted, he stated they have been exchanging text for over a year and have not met. Just Monday I found out they have had met and this has been going on for over three years, even while pregnant with my 2-year-old and even after I confronted him four months ago. they have been exchange of explicit photos, videos, numerous hotel encounters, etc. I'm devastated and angry but after crying and yelling and being upset I somehow believe he will stop and refocus his attention on me. Yet, I feel stupid for even giving him a chance, second or third chance. I fear he won't stop yet I want to help him... ugh! How can deal with his infidelity and move forward?
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Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 11,239
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Joined: Nov 2011
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Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 20,481 Likes: 6
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Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 20,481 Likes: 6 |
Four months ago I found out my husband had been exchanging explicit text with another women. When confronted, he stated they have been exchanging text for over a year and have not met. Just Monday I found out they have had met and this has been going on for over three years, even while pregnant with my 2-year-old and even after I confronted him four months ago. they have been exchange of explicit photos, videos, numerous hotel encounters, etc. I'm devastated and angry but after crying and yelling and being upset I somehow believe he will stop and refocus his attention on me. Yet, I feel stupid for even giving him a chance, second or third chance. I fear he won't stop yet I want to help him... ugh! How can deal with his infidelity and move forward? Welcome to MB and I'm so sorry for your pain. Do you know who the OW is? Is she married? How long have you been married?
FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.
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Joined: Dec 2014
Posts: 5
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Junior Member
Joined: Dec 2014
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Four months ago I found out my husband had been exchanging explicit text with another women. When confronted, he stated they have been exchanging text for over a year and have not met. Just Monday I found out they have had met and this has been going on for over three years, even while pregnant with my 2-year-old and even after I confronted him four months ago. they have been exchange of explicit photos, videos, numerous hotel encounters, etc. I'm devastated and angry but after crying and yelling and being upset I somehow believe he will stop and refocus his attention on me. Yet, I feel stupid for even giving him a chance, second or third chance. I fear he won't stop yet I want to help him... ugh! How can deal with his infidelity and move forward? Welcome to MB and I'm so sorry for your pain. Do you know who the OW is? Is she married? How long have you been married? I don't know the OW... all I know is that they attended high school together. We have been married 15 years ... I feel there is so much invested in our relationship to throw it all away including kids ... I have been trying to forgive and move forward however it is the back of my mind every time he picks up the phone, goes to work, etc... it is a horrible feeling. I contacted the OW via facebook and ask to stop seeking each other... she responded with other topics which I'm not planning on chat with her. For what I've read she has been in the process of divorcing for the last 4 years.... but I don't know much about her.
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Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985 Likes: 1
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Joined: Apr 2001
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[I contacted the OW via facebook and ask to stop seeking each other... she responded with other topics which I'm not planning on chat with her. For what I've read she has been in the process of divorcing for the last 4 years.... but I don't know much about her. In other words, she is a married woman. The first thing you should do is quietly go to her Facebook page and copy and paste all of her contacts into a text doc. Can you do this now? When you are finished, go to the exposure thread in the link in my signature and read that thread. Then come back here and we will help you develop an exposure plan.
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 20,481 Likes: 6
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Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 20,481 Likes: 6 |
Has her BH (betrayed husband) been told? How many children do you have and their ages? Have you read the Exposure 101 thread? Good that you know her Facebook. Please copy all of her contacts and save them for later. It is in here SAA-Start Here First Have you been tested for STDs? I'm so sorry for your pain. You do want to try and save your marriage, correct?
FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.
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Joined: Dec 2014
Posts: 5
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Joined: Dec 2014
Posts: 5 |
Well... out of anger I've exposed her to her Dad (I hadn't read "Exposure 101" yet) ... but they I felt childish coming from a 40 year old grown women. The truth I don't want to expose my husband to his family and friends or to my family ... it will be too painful as it is for me. Let me read through "Exposure 101" first ... by the way, my children are 7 and 2 year olds
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Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985 Likes: 1
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Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985 Likes: 1 |
Well... out of anger I've exposed her to her Dad (I hadn't read "Exposure 101" yet) ... but they I felt childish coming from a 40 year old grown women. The truth I don't want to expose my husband to his family and friends or to my family ... it will be too painful as it is for me. Let me read through "Exposure 101" first ... by the way, my children are 7 and 2 year olds If you want to save your marriage, exposure is your greatest tool. It is your best chance at saving your marriage.
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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