It sounds like you have some good ideas.

Now, one of the most important things to remember in all of this, and I remember you saying this in your original post, but You need to do the best plan A possible. Show her why you are the more attractive option. Become the best father and husband on the planet. Even though you feel like falling apart inside, you need to appear strong, and let her know how important your marriage is to you. Don�t appear needy and weak. Be kind, loving and confident.

ESL, make a plan. Go to radio shack and see what GPS units they have. Or ask the PI to loan you the GPS for a few days. You need a real time GPS. Download and read up on mrfone so you will be prepared when the opportunity arrives to grab her phone. Did you read the links I posted about mrfone?

Thanks.. thats what ive been doing my best to do... Be calm around her, collected, my self and loving. I still do for her, I still take care of the kids when she can't, cook, I fequently ask her if she wants to do dinner, or watch a movie.. she had a rough week, I offered one of my $1 massages a bit of an inside joke, but its a shoulder massage.. For our anniversary i wrote her a nice letter and got her nice gifts and card even though i got nothing.. I didnt' complain about it ask for anything or even mention it... Just trying to be a constant and solid husband

She has actually said in therapy a few times, I am a great husband, great father, great person... probably the typical its not you its me line.

Yes, and I saw the teensafe link too... but She may have changed her itunes password. so not sure i can use that one.

If you do still have her iTunes password, there is a very good post in the Operation Investigate subforum that details how you can access ALL of her text messages, even the deleted ones.

I can't look it up for you right now, so you will have to do some homework and find it on your own.

That way, you font even need Teensafe, but it would still be good to have near instant information.

LTL

Did you try to get into her iTunes account?

I got my Securus GPS from Radio Shack. It was $99. & $20/ month service. It can be hard wired or I just charged mine once a week. You can attach it anywhere on the car with heavy duty velcro that is included. I attached my H's under the front passengers seat. It was very easy to place or retrieve for charging when he was in the shower, cutting grass, sleeping etc. You can track it live or you can also track history from minutes up to at least 30 days. Very easy and inconspicuous to place & track. I would track him live from my cell phone as well as from my laptop computer.

Thanks SKD, ill check out radio shack locally...

as far as itunes, I just tried it from my PC, I can't get into itunes.

You don't need to. Just install iTunes on your PC and backup her phone. Everything you need will be right there for you to snoop through at your leisure.

Not sure how current these are, but you don't even need software to look through the backup files although it definitely makes it more readable and organized. Just open them in a text reader.

Description of iTunes backup files

ESL,

Since you can assume they are intimate, you need to avoid having sex with your WW, so you don't catch whatever STD OM might have. Your children need one health and sane parent.

You can investigate OM, speak with ex wives, etc if they exist, basically OMs past is his future. OM will often target a certain type of female, with a certain set plan to carry on the affair.

God Bless
Gamma

ESL, this advice isn't technicality wrong, but worrying about this kind of thing is frankly kind of a distraction. Be focused on what you can do to gather evidence while not love busting. That's your mission right now.

So i can get data from phone with itunes without kn0wing the password?

this OM is married for 25 years with 4 kids.

Password for what? iTunes? Or the phone? Does she have a password on the phone itself?

iTunes Backup

Just don't encrypt it when you back it up.

Have you gotten anymore Intel?

ELS, How are things going with your situation? How are you holding up?

ELS, I have been in your shoe's about a year ago, I'm in recovery with my wife, who thanked me for fighting for us on several occasions. I skimmed through your post, and it looks like you haven't exposed the affair yet? I do believe with everyone else she took it deep undercover, I also read you are worried about legal issues, I understand that whole heartedly, I'm in Law Enforcement, and I had to be very careful with everything, even when I confronted OM. The police were called on me and I waited for them and report was done. The other big thing is make sure you PLAN A your butt off. I Made sure I planned A like there was no tomorrow and even in the most horrible situation I was put in. By listening to these people on here, you have a better chance in saving your marriage than sitting back while the affair is going on and being in denial.

I was there what if I'm wrong etc...when I exposed it, Yes I caught H$ll for it. believe you me but it's all part of the process that you will go through. If you get a chance read my thread.