Was that post to me?

I agree...which is why I suggested the BH end this cake eating. This is not a WW who is living at home or taking care of her children in any sort of way. She's just a mooch.

Not some BHs, all BH s - Dr H expressly says that kicking out a WW is very risky , he also says that those who are kept out during an A would only return if there is 'no other choice'

The ideal Plan A involves being together in the home as much as possible for as long as possible. So instead of him keeping her out more, he needs to be trying to keep her around as much as he can - causing trouble in the A.



No the last post is about the children - the BH should stick close to them if he fears abuse or neglect. Of course the WW is going to neglect children in all scenarios.

That's why he has exposed to his children so they can express their resentment to her instead of blaming themselves.

Exactly, he only has a sliver of time to Plan A her in as it is.

Just persuading her to stay for breakfast, or on to a family event would cause ricochets in the A.

When there's rows in the pig pen she will want to go home to her family.

Several posts have claimed she is at home half of the time. Your recent one just caught my attention when I had time to reply.

Is expressing hurt each and every time the WW makes contact with her POSOM wrong? Not from what I repeatedly read.

So, I don't feel making a request to not continue contact in my home is too far of a stretch. What about requesting her to go outside when she makes contact? Would that be wrong?

SHE is not currently living at the family home.

I feel this poster needs Dr. Harley's advice and be on the MB Radio show.

Also, I personlly have not gotten the sense that the OP properly told the full truth to his children, otherwise they may have spoken up and asked Mama why she is hurting them and their Family.

LTL

YES!!! He needs to continue offering ANY quality and fun time to her at every opportunity, even if the answer in No 100 times in a row.

LTL

Gotcha...I said "half" for ease and not to work up numbers. Even when she's there she isn't there which was the main point. 50%, 42.5%, 18.75%...doesn't matter here.

That time NEEDS to be documented in a hand written journal.

Someone link the, "Document, Document,Document" thread.

IF/When this goes before a Judge, this status quo will be quite legally significant.

Hopefully, that can be avoided.

LTL

Please read this.

DOCUMENT DOCUMENT DOCUMENT

Oh absolutely. It's quite shocking behaviour for a WW and will put him in great stead legally.

If you have any emails or texts backing up when she is/isn't there keep them alongside your diary. Maybe even try to encourage her to see them more on email and keep her replies.

If you ever do need to go to a Plan B and exclude her you should have no probs getting custody.

I have been keeping a journal. she even sent me a text saying that the place she has been saying is not place for the kids. My atty has that. Now I do think the rows in the pig pen have started. The reason I say this is I guess they are going to a weekend party this weekend and he told her that she is on her own sat he has friends he wants to hang out with. Also my bday is next week and she asked if we could go out. So I'm not sure if shes stringing me along or if there's trouble in paradise

Nots always. There are WSs who still participate in the children's lives. I am not saying BH shouldn't Plan A if he hopes to salvage the marriage but was pointing out that this is not a WW who is living at home or parenting her children in any sort of real way. She doesn't have to be "kicked out"...she's already hardly there.

His parents told you this to your face?

Did you actually talk to OM's parents yourself?

Who else on OM's side have you exposed to?

Please answer this - dying to know!

Exposure of OM and his his enabling parents would cook this goose I'm sure.

Both. That's Plan A.

Awesome if you could expose to friends before his party Saturday. I'd also invite her to do something fun that night and on your birthday.

Indeed, I made it a point in my internet postings of the other woman to mention that her parents knew about it and did nothing about it. I would recommend you do the same in the OM cheaterville/cheater report posting.

Yes his parents told me this to my face. I was like wow you people are real winners here. then they told me to get off their property and if i returnd they would call the sherriff. Now all I was doing was talking I said nothing bad about anybody so What was that all about? And yes I too am going to fake pattys day on sat so I may end up seeing her there alon and will take matters from there

Actually, women are not as vulnerable to cake eating as men are. Men can be content having multiple women meeting their emotional needs, but women are rarely content having multiple men. Women experience dissonance and have a greater need to pick the best of the men available and attempt to have all of their emotional needs met by that one chosen man. That is why husbands can be more successful at winning wayward wives back via Plan A than wives can husbands. The strategy is to make yourself the best choice. This will cause the wayward wife to experience the discomfort of dissonance because she needs to make a choice more than the enjoyment of cake eating because she has more than one man to meet her emotional needs.

How do I show her I'm the better man? We had a pretty good weekend last weekend. She called me up and said she wanted to take me out for my birthday, we went to dinner and dancing had a great time. Sat we spent all day toghter till about 2, then she left and went to the OM house and went dancing with him. She called me up at 1am and told me we needed to talk. I said ok what do you want to talk about? she said Ill come by tomorrow and talk to you. She answered a lot of questions for me that have been plauging my mind. I asked y, she said I really don't know, I have no responsibilities now. I asked is he a better man than me? she said no not hardly, I asked if he treated her as good as I did? she laughed and said no way. I asked if she was happy, she said thats kind of tricky, I am happy I have all this freedom now, but I see what it's doing to you and the kids and that upsets me a lot, she said I'm truly sorry this happened. Then she told me that this was something that she just had to do right now. She told me she still loved me and she needed time to figure this all out. Then monday she sent me a text and said that she does think she'll be back but she doesn't know how soon. So Am I doing the right thing?

This whole story blows my mind. <<EDIT>>