|
|
Joined: Jan 2010
Posts: 15,818 Likes: 7
Member
|
Member
Joined: Jan 2010
Posts: 15,818 Likes: 7 |
Poppy,
There won't be any opportunities today as she has class until 9:00 - 9:30 tonight, and works until then.
Thanks,
Remark Figure out when and where will she be unwinding or recreating, and join her for that. Don't plan something to do for yourself to unwind, find something to do with her.
If you are serious about saving your marriage, you can't get it all on this forum. You've got to listen to the Marriage Builders Radio show, every day. Install the app! Married to my radiant trophy wife, Prisca, 19 years. Father of 8. Attended Marriage Builders weekend in May 2010 If your wife is not on board with MB, some of my posts to other men might help you.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jun 2011
Posts: 11,650
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Jun 2011
Posts: 11,650 |
Apples,
Lunch wasn't viable today. Her ofc is 30 mins. from mine, best case. We're thinking along the same lines, though.
Thanks, Remark Remark, keep in mind that your wife doesn't need to be available in order for you to pursue her. Asking her out makes love bank deposits even if she says she can't. In fact the less available she is, the more you get to showcase your persistence, patience and inventiveness.
What would you do if you were not afraid?
"Fear is the little death. Fear is the mind-killer" Frank Herbert.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jun 2012
Posts: 1,209
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Jun 2012
Posts: 1,209 |
Apples,
Lunch wasn't viable today. Her ofc is 30 mins. from mine, best case. We're thinking along the same lines, though.
Thanks, Remark Remark, keep in mind that your wife doesn't need to be available in order for you to pursue her. Asking her out makes love bank deposits even if she says she can't. In fact the less available she is, the more you get to showcase your persistence, patience and inventiveness. Words of goodwill.... Text msgs and voicemails with hopeful messages. It's a new day!
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jun 2012
Posts: 573
Member
|
|
OP
Member
Joined: Jun 2012
Posts: 573 |
Apples,
Lunch wasn't viable today. Her ofc is 30 mins. from mine, best case. We're thinking along the same lines, though.
Thanks, Remark Remark, keep in mind that your wife doesn't need to be available in order for you to pursue her. Asking her out makes love bank deposits even if she says she can't. In fact the less available she is, the more you get to showcase your persistence, patience and inventiveness. Words of goodwill.... Text msgs and voicemails with hopeful messages. It's a new day! Didnt, Apples, Indie, Markos, Thanks, good advice from you all. Last night, JD2D had a mid-term in her class. No chance to unwind together. I did give her a gift I had purchased a few months ago for her, as she picked up our son at 10:00 PM, after that class mid-term. I hope to get some of chances in the coming 3-day weekend to pursue her, perhaps even tonight. We have an appointment with Steven Harley tomorrow at 12:30 PM. It will probably be a "make or break" meeting. Thanks, Remark
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jun 2012
Posts: 1,209
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Jun 2012
Posts: 1,209 |
Make or break? That depends on how much you honor your wife aka honoring her perspective. Don't think in absolutes, Remark. Please Don't assume. Life is not binary. Be open. 
Last edited by DidntQuit; 07/02/15 09:43 AM.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jan 2010
Posts: 15,818 Likes: 7
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Jan 2010
Posts: 15,818 Likes: 7 |
No chance to unwind together. But she did unwind, somehow, at some point. Find out how she is doing it and when.
If you are serious about saving your marriage, you can't get it all on this forum. You've got to listen to the Marriage Builders Radio show, every day. Install the app! Married to my radiant trophy wife, Prisca, 19 years. Father of 8. Attended Marriage Builders weekend in May 2010 If your wife is not on board with MB, some of my posts to other men might help you.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jan 2010
Posts: 15,818 Likes: 7
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Jan 2010
Posts: 15,818 Likes: 7 |
Quit posting reasons why you can't follow the plan. Just ignore the reasons and follow the plan anyway.
If you are serious about saving your marriage, you can't get it all on this forum. You've got to listen to the Marriage Builders Radio show, every day. Install the app! Married to my radiant trophy wife, Prisca, 19 years. Father of 8. Attended Marriage Builders weekend in May 2010 If your wife is not on board with MB, some of my posts to other men might help you.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jan 2010
Posts: 15,818 Likes: 7
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Jan 2010
Posts: 15,818 Likes: 7 |
The reason your marriage is not recovering is because when people post things like:
"Figure out when and where will she be unwinding or recreating, and join her for that."
Your response is things like:
"No chance to unwind together."
That's why. You aren't following the program.
Save your breath. Don't bother posting reasons why you can't follow the suggestions. There's no sense even typing it up.
If you are serious about saving your marriage, you can't get it all on this forum. You've got to listen to the Marriage Builders Radio show, every day. Install the app! Married to my radiant trophy wife, Prisca, 19 years. Father of 8. Attended Marriage Builders weekend in May 2010 If your wife is not on board with MB, some of my posts to other men might help you.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Apr 2010
Posts: 1,152
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Apr 2010
Posts: 1,152 |
If someone gave you a million dollars to get your wife to say yes to going out with you this weekend, I bet you would be able to come up with some ideas...
me, DH
all the children
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Aug 2014
Posts: 1,842
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Aug 2014
Posts: 1,842 |
I wonder how the counseling session went.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jun 2012
Posts: 573
Member
|
|
OP
Member
Joined: Jun 2012
Posts: 573 |
It is tomorrow at 12:30.
I'll post something.
Thx, Remark
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jun 2012
Posts: 573
Member
|
|
OP
Member
Joined: Jun 2012
Posts: 573 |
I asked her to the Botanical Gardens for this lantern display tonight. She declined saying she has some work to work on at the house.
I texted her later and asked if she needed help with that work. She said "no, think I'll take a nap",
Remark
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jan 2010
Posts: 15,818 Likes: 7
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Jan 2010
Posts: 15,818 Likes: 7 |
I asked her to the Botanical Gardens for this lantern display tonight. She declined saying she has some work to work on at the house.
I texted her later and asked if she needed help with that work. She said "no, think I'll take a nap",
Remark Nice work. Ask again.
If you are serious about saving your marriage, you can't get it all on this forum. You've got to listen to the Marriage Builders Radio show, every day. Install the app! Married to my radiant trophy wife, Prisca, 19 years. Father of 8. Attended Marriage Builders weekend in May 2010 If your wife is not on board with MB, some of my posts to other men might help you.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jun 2011
Posts: 11,650
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Jun 2011
Posts: 11,650 |
Good job 
What would you do if you were not afraid?
"Fear is the little death. Fear is the mind-killer" Frank Herbert.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Apr 2010
Posts: 1,152
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Apr 2010
Posts: 1,152 |
How did the counseling session work out?
me, DH
all the children
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jun 2012
Posts: 573
Member
|
|
OP
Member
Joined: Jun 2012
Posts: 573 |
How did the counseling session work out? HH, I thought it went well. W probably didn't based on our little interactions since then. Spent half the session individually, first, W and then me. At end, all three of us conferred. We are both to set up individual sessions next week. I am still pursuing W, getting rejections whenever I ask her out or to do something with son (like fireworks or dinner.) But, I'm still pursuing even though we're not accomplishing 15, let alone 30, hours/week. Thanks for asking, Remark
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Mar 2010
Posts: 7,362 Likes: 3
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Mar 2010
Posts: 7,362 Likes: 3 |
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Aug 2014
Posts: 1,842
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Aug 2014
Posts: 1,842 |
Don't try to read her mind. It is disrespectful
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jun 2012
Posts: 573
Member
|
|
OP
Member
Joined: Jun 2012
Posts: 573 |
Prisca, First, you need to understand, W wanted to spend first session talking about the family dynamic. So, we did. Steve laid it out to me that Biblically, my wife MUST come first, just as the forum has said, to establish the "glue" of our relationship. So, he is going to focus on that initially, refining my "compass" on that issue. He was semi-encouraging. I'll be calling the MB office on Monday to set up next session. Any thoughts/advice? Thanks, remadk
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jun 2012
Posts: 573
Member
|
|
OP
Member
Joined: Jun 2012
Posts: 573 |
Don't try to read her mind. It is disrespectful Apples, OK. I'll leave it at I thought it went well. Steve is very engaging and inspires my confidence to keep at it. Thanks, Remark
|
|
|
Moderated by Ariel, BerlinMB, Denali, Fordude, IrishGreen, MBeliever, MBsurvivor, MBSync, McLovin, Mizar, PhoenixMB, Toujours
|
0 members (),
333
guests, and
76
robots. |
|
Key:
Admin,
Global Mod,
Mod
|
|
|
Forums67
Topics133,622
Posts2,323,477
Members71,918
| |
Most Online3,185
Jan 27th, 2020
|
|
|
|
