Excerpt from Mortarman: "The reason I say go to the IG, rather than the commander of the person's unit, is that many times, the commander might like the servicemember (SM) so they might just sweep it under the rug. That you do NOT want to happen! So, with the IG, they will go to the commander, tell him that they have this complaint...and the commander will conduct an investigation. The IG will oversee this, making sure that the commander does the right thing...and if a violation is found, that the appropriate actions/punishment happen. It will NOT be swept under the rug!"

I called the Army IG today and was told that the IG does not have authority over the commander. So basically this means that the IG cannot make sure that the commander does the right thing. as written in Mortarman's post Therefore, the action the commander will take against the SM will be biased based on whether the commander likes or dislikes the service member. I guess this varies from one branch to another.

Why are you worrying if the commander will or will not "do the right thing" when you yourself are balking on doing the right thing? You should do the right thing, report him, and let the chips fall where they may.

He didn't say the IG has authority over the commander. The point is that once a complaint is filed the commander CAN'T sweep it under the rug because the IG knows of the complaint. It is much like reporting an affair to the HR department instead of directly to the persons supervisor. The cheaters supervisor might sweep it under the rug, but since HR knows about it, that can't happen.

I posted the above post to notify people that the info in Mortarman's post may apply to one branch but not all. People gin the forum get the wrong idea, just like I did before I actually talked to the IG. The Mortarman's post gives the idea that the exposure will be more effective if done through the IG which obviously is not exactly true in every case. I think people should know there is a difference. It has nothing to do with whether I am wondering if the commander will do the right thing or not.

Ok, I see what you mean now. It makes sense. I read it and understood it the wrong way.

Just called the IG. I was told if I do not have any pictures or absolute proof nothing can be done pretty much. I guess we will see.

I have never known of a BS having "absolute proof." That is found when they do the investigation. Are they going to investigate? And did you give them the email where he admits his affair?

His admission is evidence of an affair.

needinput, I have a sense that you are trying desperately to get out of reporting his affair to the IG because you imagine that it will ruin your chances of winning him over when he comes home in 3 weeks. Am I right about that?

The UCMJ and its application is for all branches of service. IGs exist is all branches of service and they all operate according to the UCMJ.

What is your real problem with this exposure? You seem to have lots of manufactured excuses to not expose the affair and your husband's despicable actions.

I already posted above that I already called. You obviously misunderstood what I wrote.

I was told someone will get a hold of me and talk to me about it. But they said they will go ahead and bring this up to the command.

I am not going to sit and argue here. I already repored. What is so confusing about my post? No, I have no chances of getting him back. Pretty slim. You are all wrong for thinking I did not report. I said I called the IG and reported him. They told me someone else will get a hold of me to get more info.

You mentioned that you are worried about hi. Getting in trouble because she's a prostitute. Have you considered that as a possible good thing? He needs to be held accountable for his actions, and the consequences should help break the fog he is in.

Has he been violent with you before?

I doubt it is a prostitute. He is more likely protecting a coworker. They can uncover this in their investigation.

Good point!

Your first post about the IG looked like you kind of just brushed it off, like he said you need proof and you were like ok well I don't have any pictures...

Melody is just making this statement because it seems like you are lacking the energy - Melody wants you to call the IG and tell him everything and don't put the phone down or hang up until they say "OK OK OK we will look into it JEEZ woman... send us what you got." Then after that I would add "I got some emails between my husband and that prostitute!if its a prostitute at all! I think its someone in his COMPANY! IS that enough evidence? How are you letting this happen!" etc.

Show some emotion - it really resonates with the posters on here. They would hate to see you get rolled over by this affair... trust me I was (and still am) a very "by the rules" kind of guy, but during exposure everyone on here convinced me that I really needed to push my own limits for a successful exposure.

just saying - she is not misunderstanding what you said. Everyone is here to help.

She is a bar girl. Other soldiers from his unit have seen her.

I gave the IG my name, my husband's contact info, and he told me he will contact his commander and bring the issue up. He told me someond will contact me to get more info from me.

I would follow up - this is slightly relevant but I contacted many people in HR through my wife's company. I told her boss - he did not respond. So I told her branch HR manager - she said "She would look into it." Then I told the Vice President of Human relations of her company - who also said "they would investigate further." Then I told the HR manager of his region - who also said "they would look into it"... all of this eventually led back to OM and my wife so I know that eventually one of those people confronted them.

Long story short - make sure you are just being silenced... follow up (it can be polite). Be relentless