OMG everyone......as you have talked to me thru these months you have seen that i (like everyone i am sure) take every little thing hard. last nite was no exception.

my husband served me at home w/divorce papers. they came at 10pm. they knocked on my screen door, did not ring a bell---so they knew i had kids. i said is someone there. it sounded really like wind banging the screen or something. he said i am here to serve "my name" with papers. i waited a few seconds and said she is not home yet. he said ok and i yelled thru the door again, should i tell her who came by? he said, no i can only give them to her. so he walked away and i had time to make a long distance call to my SILs (the one whos husband is cheating w/her friend) find out she is at her friends and call the friend, then have the friends son go look to see if she can talk, then tell the friend why i am hysterical, then have her go get my SIL..at this point my sil gets on the phone , there is a banging again. i go and say hello, they say, i am just going to leave them under the door. they can slide under my rod iron screen door. so i say, well i guess so. so i hear the sliding, and then no noise. by this time i am crying hysterically to my sil (who is obviously going thru some crisis herself.) she says she is having a hard nite and that i need to go stay w/my family.

i knew what these papers were...i had my stepdaughter open the door and quickly retrieve them. i read them and they were as i thought divorce kit type papers serving me w/dissolution of marriage, they were submitted to the court 5-23-03. they are legal. they are stamped by a judge and signed by the clerks.

I AM REALLY LOSING IT!

i have/had already an appt (for 2 wks now) with a lawyer this tuesday coming up. i feel so low already i really really wanted to be the one to serve him.

<img border="0" alt="[Teary]" title="" src="graemlins/teary.gif" /> <img border="0" alt="[Teary]" title="" src="graemlins/teary.gif" /> <img border="0" alt="[Teary]" title="" src="graemlins/teary.gif" /> <img border="0" alt="[Teary]" title="" src="graemlins/teary.gif" /> <img border="0" alt="[Teary]" title="" src="graemlins/teary.gif" />

<small>[ May 31, 2003, 05:47 AM: Message edited by: kuljey ]</small>

Kuljey,
Well, you won't be the one to serve him, so let that go.

Keep your appointment, focus on finances & custody.

The papers will say, but you probably have 20-30 days to reply to being served. In my state, a 60 day no fault divorce, begins after the servee signs the served papers and they are filed at the courthouse. So, take the full legal amount of time you have to sign.

Here when the time limit runs out, the server can go back to court without the servee's signature to initiate the proceedings.

You have some weeks to work with before the D is filed, but you need to know what your state laws are and your lawyer will know.

I'm sorry, Kuljey, I know this isn't what you want.

Kuljey,

I am sorry you received such bad news right now. Ok, next plan of action.... are you up for this yet?

Remember: This is not over until you make it over. Dr Phil brought up a good point in one of his show's this week about D. He said that one should not get the D if there are unresolved issues along with anger. The D should be worked on after the issues are iron out. re: D in itself will be hard. NO sense putting emotional stress of anger into play when dealing with D issues. It may make people make the wrong decisions.

Hugz,
L.

lor cant work on things if wh doesnt want to. <img border="0" alt="[Teary]" title="" src="graemlins/teary.gif" />

I am so sorry about the divorce papers. We can make it through this and get on with our lives. You don't need him, you have to get better physically since your operation, just think when you lose your weight your husband is going to be sorry one of these days and it's going to be to late for him, you will move one.