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Joined: Nov 2002
Posts: 27
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Joined: Nov 2002
Posts: 27 |
My husband looks at porn whenever I'm sleeping or out of the house. Never in my presence, and of course he deletes all his movies and pics. But I know he looks cause I can find them on the pc in the logs etc. Even when our relationship is going great he still looks. I don't understand that. Of course, I'm not a guy, and I don't think like one. I think like a woman and maybe there are some guys here who could give me some insight? Thank you.
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Joined: Apr 2003
Posts: 2,973
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Joined: Apr 2003
Posts: 2,973 |
Women are as perplexed over these types of issues, (porn needs), as men are over our need to communicate verbally. He hides it because he is embarassed about it. You probably don't care for him looking at it like most wives.
Women and men are so different, it is almost like we were different animals altogether at times. Part of this makes our relationship fun and part of this makes it hellish, trying to figure out why this one does this and that one does that.
You wrote about EA. That is a good topic as well. Men who do it, do not think it is cheating. EA's are just as hurtful and deserves more present day attention to teach the male (and females), that it is hurtful and sneaky too. It is also a good ground for divorce.
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Joined: Mar 2001
Posts: 3,646
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Joined: Mar 2001
Posts: 3,646 |
Here's the link to Patrick Carnes' web site. Carnes is probably the world's foremost expert on sexual addiction. He pioneered the research and brought to light the fact that there is such an addicition. His newest book is called "In the Shadows of the Net, Breaking Free of Compulsive Online Sexual Behavior." You can read some sample pages of the book at amazon.com. Carnes' site: www.sexhelp.comI do some work with addictions and have a particular interest in this one. I'd be happy to help with questions you have. You can always find me here or especially at JFO. C <small>[ June 03, 2003, 07:53 AM: Message edited by: cerri ]</small>
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Joined: Nov 2002
Posts: 27
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Joined: Nov 2002
Posts: 27 |
Thanks to Cerri and Wflower for responding. Wflower, my post was supposed to be like my profile where I wrote about EA. I just didn't put it in the right way. Plus, like it says, I can't remember when exactly it took place, but it was at least 3 years ago. I don't think I will ever completely trust him again. But we get along, and we try in our own way to get along, but things like his hiding his porn, and me wondering if I should mention that I know he looks at it bother me. And even if I did mention it, what good will come of it?
Thanks to Cerri for the book site. I'll check it out. Hey, it might even be in the library so I dont' have to buy it.
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