<blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by FaithHopeLove:
<strong>Hi O2bsane! How is your life going?</strong><hr></blockquote><p>Thanks for asking!<p>My life is going very well. For the last year or so I've been content to stay busy with my kids and put some effort into catching up with my neglected career. (It's difficult to find enough time to save a marriage AND get ahead at work.) Now that I feel like I have things mostly under control I'm starting to work on other things - like the yard. [img]images/icons/grin.gif" border="0[/img] <p>It's been a long, slow, sometimes excruciatingly painful process, but I'm happy in spite of it all.<p>I'm better off now than I was in the marriage. I'll always believe that we could have saved it and come out of the struggles better than ever, but I couldn't have done it alone. I gave it all I had and then some. This wasn't what I set out after all those years ago, but it's much better than the marriage was.<p>It's very nice to see you again!

i have been wandering about in these posts wondering if i( we ) were the only ones that went straight from my finding out about H's EA to making up and trying to recover. I found out years after the fact, although he still had contact with OW. we have been doing fine,he broke all contact,we have had no counseling, and just have been reading our bibles, reading other books to help our marriage, and trying to be totally honest with each other. it has been about a year since d'day, but i still am having trust issues, your post has helped me to think my husband can actually be late sometime and me not fall into immediate panic or atleaszt the right kind of panic. thanks, any advice or comment would be welcomed. ~ H [img]images/icons/tongue.gif" border="0[/img]

Welcome, SCHOOL! I don't read GQ anymore, so I don't know the recent stories. You might want to search on LaurieC, in the Read Only section, and maybe in the Recovery. Her H's affair was over for some time before she found out and they are quite a success. HGBrauner...I may not be spelling that correctly, is another success story that you may like to search. <p>You can find my 3 year saga here. Basically, my H was ending the affair about the time I discovered it. He had met her in a bar and met her about 10 times, although they talked on the phone like made. I believe him when he says it had not become sexual beyond the kissy face stuff. It took maybe two years to believe that.<p>Even with a great recovery, your experience is extremely painful. It takes years. I have grown and learned so much about myself.<p>A year is just enough time to get past the excruiciating 24/7 feelings. It gets better. In fact you see by my post, at 3+ years, I just passed another milestone! [img]images/icons/smile.gif" border="0[/img] <p>I'd be happy to help you by answering any questions. It sounds like you are doing the right things and you need lots of time.

~~~ FaithHopeLove~ thanks for the encouragment.
I need it. Yesterday I saw my husband responding to an email he got from a mutual friend of ours, someone who helps out at our church as a childrens pastors secretary. He was mailing her about a class he teaches, the emails were just polite chatter and about her son who is in my husbands class, but i was freaking(inside) to think He is sooo over this whole thing that He would think I would be ok with his e mailing ( however innocent) another woman. ~did any of that make sense?~ But we talked about it and he said he would never have done that if he knew it would make me upset. then i tend to feel like i am over reacting. not that he makes me feel that way, i just look at it from another point of view and i see it differently. i guess it will be this way for a while. ... sigh.... like rational flying out the window huh... thanks H [img]images/icons/rolleyes.gif" border="0[/img]

Hi Faith, how are you doing?
I think it is great you didn't automatically assume he was cheating on you-that shows strength and growth! Give yourself two extra pats on the back-your sub-conscience is finally listening to you. <p> [img]images/icons/smile.gif" border="0[/img]

faithhopelove~ am looking for lauriec and cannot find her story, im really interested in reading it can you help me find it ?? please? ~H

http://www.marriagebuilders.com/cgi-bin/ultimatebb.cgi?ubb=get_topic&f=1&t=010138<p>SCHOOL...here is one link to an old Read Only Post. If you search the Read Only Posts with LaurieC's Member #511, a few more pop up. I forgot, most of her posts came before a bad crash in 1999 and prior posts, when she was actually in early recovery, were lost. However, she retells her story and I think you can still get a great deal out of it.<p>If you click on the sunglasses in this post, then ask to view recent posts, all her 2001 posts in the Recovery section will pop up. Good luck! [img]images/icons/smile.gif" border="0[/img]

WOW!! Who would have thought a post from 1999 could help me sooo much! Faithopelove~ thanks for connecting me with the links to LaurieC. I have been encouraged! I thought maybe we were recovering too fast, I think reading in here made me think I should be still having trouble in areas ia am not having trouble in. But after reading some of those posts I think we are doing fine. Not that I still don't have some issues, but I and doing ok and will deal. :cool have a great day everyone~ H:

WOW!! Who would have thought a post from 1999 could help me sooo much! Faithopelove~ thanks for connecting me with the links to LaurieC. I have been encouraged! I thought maybe we were recovering too fast, I think reading in here made me think I should be still having trouble in areas ia am not having trouble in. But after reading some of those posts I think we are doing fine. Not that I still don't have some issues, but I and doing ok and will deal. :cool have a great day everyone~ H: