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First I should let it be known that I will be divorcing. I am not going to try to save my marriage again.
My wife has had, or is still having yet another affair, and I am leaving.
I do not want to give too many details, as I am afraid my wife might read this, though it is unlikely.
We have one child in elementary school.
Wife is pregnant though the child is probably NOT mine.
There is enough evidence to prove the affair in a court of law.
I am heart broken, and I am not going to allow myself to go through this again.
A few years ago my wife had a handful of affairs.
She stopped, promised not to do it again, and I started my false recovery.
Now several years later I am in this boat again.
Also, my wife has taken my child to the OM house multiple times, so my child was in that house during the adultry,
I have not exposed to anyone as of now.
So my question is, should I expose even though I am ending the marriage?
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The answer is YES. Everyone should know. How old is your child? My suggestion would be to get legal protection before you move out of the house. Many courts view this as abandonment. You are usually able to get better legal conditions while your wife is fogged out in an affair. Sorry this has happened to you.
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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Welcome to MB and sorry for your pain. Who is the OM? Is he married? Since your child is in elementary school, you should expose to them in an age appropriate manner. Read Exposing to Children
FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.
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Hello,
Thank you all for your replies and help.
I would like to be very careful, because there is a slim chance my wife might read this.
OM lives within walking distance of our house.
I do not want to give mare details at this time because my wife might read this.
Should I expose ASAP?
Should I expose to all of her known friends?
I am able to prove the affair enough for a jury to believe the affair indeed happened.
(At least it is my opinion that a jury would believe it)
Last edited by Intenselove; 12/25/19 01:53 PM.
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Should I expose ASAP?
Should I expose to all of her known friends?
) Yes, I would expose. But I would expose to family members on both sides, your child [if over 4] and close friends. Is the OM married? The OM's family and friends should be informed, especially his wife. Please read the exposure thread linked in my signature. Your exposure message will be a little different because you don't want to save the marriage.
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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Does your wife know you know?
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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She knows I know. I have told her and demanded the truth, but I only get lies.
I can give more details in a PM.
Also, should I wait until I have more ducks in a row with my lawyer before I expose?
I’ll be glad to go into more details in a PM
OM is not married.
Last edited by Intenselove; 12/25/19 03:08 PM.
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This website is a God send. I am very grateful for you all.
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It looks like PM’s are disabled.
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It looks like PM’s are disabled. Yes PMs are disabled on this site. Can you say how your WW met the OM?
FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.
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We live in the same neighborhood.
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We live in the same neighborhood as OM.
My wife is a malignant narcissist.
She has Narcissistic Personality disorder.
She has no conscience at all.
She had several affairs several years ago, and when I found out we started a fake recovery.
She has seen the pain it caused, and she still chose to do it again
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She knows I know. I have told her and demanded the truth, but I only get lies.
I can give more details in a PM.
Also, should I wait until I have more ducks in a row with my lawyer before I expose?
I’ll be glad to go into more details in a PM
OM is not married. I would expose now and get that out of the way. Do you have access to the OM's facebook page? Do you know how to reach his family? And did you read the Exposure thread in my signature?
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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I have read the exposure thread. I do not have access to his FB page.
I wish I could tell you guys more details.
I am a little afraid to expose as of now, I am absolutely positive about the affair, but I still might not have enough proof.
I would also like to file for divorce before I expose.
I am having a couple issues with my lawyer too.
Last edited by Intenselove; 12/25/19 04:46 PM.
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I am a little afraid to expose as of now, I am absolutely positive about the affair, but I still might not have enough proof. In your initial post, you said: "There is enough evidence to prove the affair in a court of law." What kind of proof do you have?
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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We live in the same neighborhood. Does he have kids that your child hangs around?
FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.
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The OM has no kids that my child hangs around. I think he has a kid that does not live with him.
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I am afraid to say too much here, but I have testimony from more than 2 people. (So she has admitted it to more than 2 people)
Last edited by Intenselove; 12/25/19 05:21 PM.
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Have you been on this forum before?
BW
Married 1989
His PA 2003-2006
2 kids.
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