I feel a little unqualified to give anyone advice lately, because I have been really screwed up myself, but it is easier to see what needs to be done than to make myself do it. Others out there may be ablie to achieve these goals easier than me so here it goes.<P>I'm 18 months into this, and believe it or not the images still come but they don't affect me the way they used to. This is an area where I have actually made some hopefully permanent progress.<P>My was very open to me about their actual affair. He told me some details of what they did, but more importantly he explained to me what they didn't do. (Snuggling, pillowtalk, tender loving, that sort of thing, plus some actual "Details")<P>We discussed the problem and set out to make new images for me of us together to replace the ones I had of them together. <P>He was very good about telling me how much he enjoyed this and really filled me with compliments and praise. It really helped my self esteem which then helped me relax and become even more aggressive which of course helped his enjoyment (I will stop now because I'm beginning to get warm and start to blush
).<P>The point is, when the images creep up on me, I just turn her into me and instead of getting upset another reaction happens (I won't get into that either, but it does involve wishing we were home together). That kind of reaction can only be good for a marriage and can only add Love Points for both of you.<P>If I can manage this any MAN can.
, because being able to control my thoughts and emotions is very hard for me.