Welcome to the
Marriage Builders® Discussion Forum
This is a community where people come in search of marriage related support, answers, or encouragement. Also, information about the Marriage Builders principles can be found in the books available for sale in the Marriage Builders® Bookstore.
If you would like to join our guidance forum, please read the Announcement Forum for instructions, rules, & guidelines.
The members of this community are peers and not professionals. Professional coaching is available by clicking on the link titled Coaching Center at the top of this page.
We trust that you will find the Marriage Builders® Discussion Forum to be a helpful resource for you. We look forward to your participation.
Once you have reviewed all the FAQ, tech support and announcement information, if you still have problems that are not addressed, please e-mail the administrators at
mbrestored@gmail.com
|
|
|
|
Joined: Nov 1999
Posts: 208
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Nov 1999
Posts: 208 |
My ex-H thinks he had no control and I always had to have my way. I was the stronger one in the relationship, but I didn't make all the decisions. When I asked him what he wanted to do about something he always replied, " I don't care, its up to you." Now he has twisted that against me since he began his affair. I'm sure next to OW I look like a shrew. He always told me before what a a good wife I was. In a case like this, will he always think anything was better than living with me or is there a chance once the fog lifts I might not seem so bad? None of these things were ever mentioned to me until discovery of affair. Now all he can see is my faults.<P>AD
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: May 1999
Posts: 3,040
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: May 1999
Posts: 3,040 |
My H told me after he left that I "never let him do anything he wanted", which was certainly not the case. Trying to get his opinion on any day-to-day decisions was like pulling teeth. Most of my H's complaints were about things he had never mentioned before the affair.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Oct 1999
Posts: 1,832
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Oct 1999
Posts: 1,832 |
already divorced,<P>Have you read the book "After the Affair" by janis Abrahms Spring? In it she describes the "flip-flop factor". This basically describes how the things that attracted us to our S's, later becomes the same things that drive our S's away. I think of it like your best assest is also your worst asset. You might want to check out that book. Perhaps it will give you and your H a little more understanding of this...<P>Roll me Away
|
|
|
|
0 members (),
130
guests, and
41
robots. |
|
Key:
Admin,
Global Mod,
Mod
|
|
|
Forums67
Topics133,661
Posts2,323,621
Members72,372
| |
Most Online9,682
May 13th, 2026
|
|
|
|
|
|
