After 5 years of loving a wonderful lady (I'm from a typicaly middle class family and she was from very humble beginnings) who has a sad past of dealing with severly abusive relationships, I've spent the first 2 years as her best friend and two years as her love/fiance, the last year however, has been difficult and sad.<P>I've watched the love of my life pull away over the last year due to stress of motherhood & finances (mostly emotional issues with her 12 year old daughter) claiming she 'couldn't handle a relationship now'... I've tried to show her constant affection and love... letting her know I'm here for her and her children and that nobody would ever hurt her or them again, but this scared & scarred lady who would once joyously push marriage and send me a ton of letter and cards stating her eternal love and trust would suddenly keep me at arms length... but assured me she loved me and continued our realtionship (even going so far as to beg me to return to the relationship when I left briefly when I thought it had reached it's end in June of '99... the seemingly shut-down and icy woman that she had become melted and became very emotional and loving again...)<BR>The relationship grew and developed through the summer and the fall... and the relationship with her children grew stronger (being the only obstacle that was appearantly holding back our future as becoming a married couple). But as the school season progressed, her 12 year old showed signs of depression and started to skip school daily... and cause trouble within the home. Once again, this behavior in her home caused her to push me away, saying she had to 'fix things on her own'... though my heart lied with her and her kids who lived a mere five minutes away from me. We maintained constant contact at work... saw each other when we could... and talked everynight on the phone...<P>Suddenly 4 weeks ago, her middle daughter calls me in tears and states that the father of the 12 year old (the abusive addict that nearly killed her Mom in a relationship 10 years prior) was 'down on his luck' and needed a place to stay... and the crying and pleeding of his daughter convinced her to take him in and help him. Needless to say i was devistetd and called and told her how hurt I was and that i couldn't believe it... Her and her children told me to have faith in her and believe the ONLY reason she did this was to help him in order to help their daughter (who is now seeing a therapist). As I sat back nervously and tried to be understanding and watch this unfold...she became more distant, and after three weeks admitted she felt she still had feelings for him. She broke up with me this week, after all we shared and all of her promises... to try to rekindle a realtionship with this violent addict (who is trying to be on his 'best behavior' and asked her to come back to him. Something he has done for over 10 years and she alway said no. Till now. ) <BR>She told me with tears in her eyes, "I love you... but can't stay in a relationship with you... when I feel i'm still in love with him... and I need his help with our daughter."<P>I am completely in shock as are her kids and her family (dad, sister, & brother...as well as my family.) She's running away and regressing and her children have called begging me to help... but my hands are tied as this once warm loving lady dives back into her troubled past and is lashing out at all those who love her. This is still so fresh and hurts so bad... everyone feels I'll 'get a call one day'... and that she will 'wake up'... meanwhile I fear for her safety and miss her and her children so much.<BR>I'd appreciate any words of advice and comfort... and appreciate your prayers.<P>Thank You So Much<p>[This message has been edited by RL1964 (edited February 13, 2000).]

Dear Lord, I pray that you will be with and comfort RL1964. Please show him what it is he should do right now in regards to his relationship with the woman he loves, giving him peace in his heart to know when its You speaking to him. Lord, please also be with this woman and her children. Protect them from any evil spirits and forces that may have entered her home. Reveal to her the truth, lead her in the direction You want her to go. Thank you Lord, for your ever-present love and guidance. Help RL1964 draw close to You, and trust in You. In Jesus Name I Pray, AMEN.