Many of you may have read my thread yesterday about my good day going bad. My son had been talking to his teacher by mine and H's problems, and wrote on a math paper that he thought he did poorly "BECAUSE I WANT MY DAD TO COME BACK".<BR>I shared this with H this morning, as well as a letter son wrote to him. The letter basically told H that he wants him to come home and that he is mad at him for leaving us, but he still loves him. It said he is mad at him for wanting us to move. It ended with, "I love you Dad, but you can't do this to me."<P>I presented all of this to my H very calmly, facts only, asked him to read the letter in private, after I left because it was between him and son.<P>He later told me that he will talk to son, and asked me if I could stay in the house. I said, no, it's too late. We can't afford it now. He asked if I would help to explain it to the kids that this is for the best - so we can get bills paid off and be in a better position to see to their needs financially. I said I have already told them that. He basically seems to me to have missed the point of his son's letter. My son is less upset about moving, and more upset that his dad hasn't come back.<P>Sooo, I left him a voice mail on his pager that I asked my son if he was more upset about moving, or about his dad not coming back. I told him that my son said he is more concerned with his dad coming back. I told him that I explained to our son that even if Dad did come back, we would still have to move for awhile because of our financial situation. I told my H that I was telling him this so he could approach son with the fact that he is not coming home, not with the fact that we are having to move.<P>My H did seem very concerned, but almost apologetic, and saying, "I love my sons. I just love my sons. I can't...," and then he stopped. I just listened. I said I would make sure they knew that we had to do this for the best. I told him that I want to move because if he decides to come back, I don't want the burden of the bills on us as well. He agreed without voicing it, he doesn't want to give me hope. Either that, or he has no plans of returning and he just wants me to pay off the bills to make it easier for him. Regardless, it will make it easier for us both.<P>I am really sad today about my children. I hate to see them have to suffer through this. My H always said he would never leave me, he would never leave his children, and here we are. It hurts so much to see their pain - pain that they hide from him.<P>My oldest son won't express how he feels because he says it doesn't matter - dad is going to do whatever he wants, anyway. He also is afraid that his dad will get angry with him. You see, he is very expressive, and knows how to get his feelings across very well.<P>My youngest son was afraid to talk to his dad because he didn't want to hurt his dad's feelings. He's very sensitive and can't stand to see someone's feelings hurt. That's why I told him to write him a letter, and I told him I would give it to his dad when he wasn't around.<P>I love my children, and this hurts soooo much!<P>God bless us all!<BR>TIG<BR>
