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Joined: Sep 2000
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Hi, I am new to MB. I posted over in EN but after reading all of the wisdom pouring off of my monitor here in this site I thought I'd post here too!!<BR>I have been married 16 years - a very up & down marriage - mostly due to much unresolved anger on both our parts. H has an verbally abusive anger problem at times. But then he can turn around and be so loving. I am dealing with hurt from his anger plus other dissapointments & losses over the years. We have moved five major times (states) and 12 individual moves. We also have 4 children. I met Om 5 months thru a home related project that I was main contractor for. We had many meetings alone - I developed an extreme infatuation. I wouldv'e slept w/him if the oppurtunity came and my H wouldn't find out. I felt too guilty -convicted by God to tell H before I did anything.This was one month ago. Now the fallout. I miss seeing this guy- how do you deal with this withdrawal? I don't even think I love my H anymore. I like him sometimes but other times am honestly digusted. I hate that I feel this way. We are going to counseling. But we have so much work to do - and I think wouldn't be easier to give up? I could find someone else or maybe the same OM- this is a lie I know but how do I get past this part? Has anyone else felt like this - a yo-yo where you want something so bad but you know you should go the other way? I just am not happy in my marriage so this guy is SO captivating - like a drug when I am with him. I don't hink I ever felt like that with my husband.My husbadn is trying to be patient but he is not a patient person- he gave me a card for my b-day "I want to grow old with you" I felt so guilty becasue I don't feel that way at all right now. I haven't for many years.<BR>Any thoughts or prayers - I am feeling very far from God these days. Only Christian radio seems to soothe me. God bless.

Joined: Apr 1999
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Marilynrae-<BR>There are many on the MB board that have experienced this withdrawl. It is very difficult and heartwrenching. But you have the answer right before you. <P>You said that only Christian radio sooths you. Then listen to it 24/7. Turn it on when thoughts of the om come into your head. Resist thinking about him and the enemy will flee from you. Praise the Lord 24/7. Fill your head with praises for God every time a thought enters your head.<P>You can not do it on your won, but cry out to God to help You. He can and is waiting to do so, but you must first come to Him.<BR>I am not saying this is easy, but it will become easier after a few days or less.<P>It does seem easier sometimes to throw away the old and find something new. But that is the whispering of the enemy. Claim God's promises and know the word so you can discern the whisoering of the enemy. Seek the Lord with all your heart. That is the true answer and way to break through the withdrawl. Find support. Find Christian women to fellowship with. Confide in them and tell them how they can support you. <P>Maybe a prayer partner that is especially available at the beginning to pray over you and with you.<P>Following God and being obedient is always better, but the lies of the enemy will try to convince you otherwise.<P>Giving up what we feel is best and allowing God to give us His best is rewarding beyond what we can imagine. The longer you go back and forth between the om and your h the longer you delay God's ability to truely give you His best. <P>Father, I lift up matilyn to You. I ask that You send your Holy Spirit powerfully to her today to lead her from the path of distruction to the path of righteousness. Lord send women that are grounded in Your word to support, guide, and pray for her. Lord remove the om from her permanently. Restore in her love for her h and show her Your view of her h. Lord, let her seek You with all her heart, soul, mind, spirit and body. Wrap a hedge of thorns around her and keep her from all thoughts of oms. In Jesus name, Amen.

Joined: Aug 2000
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<BR>"Any thoughts or prayers - I am feeling very far from God these days. Only Christian radio seems to soothe me. God bless."<P>Have you read Boundaries in Marriage? It is the best book I have read on this subject.<P>May God bless you and your family as you struggle to do what is right. <BR>

Joined: Aug 2000
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Hi, I have been experiencing the same thing for six months now. My gut filled advice to you is to run now back toward your husband regardless of how you feel. '<P>If I could trade places with you and be back at the beginning of making a decision whether or not to have an affair. I would choose not to.<P>It is the most horrible feeling anyone could experience. I am almost lost and trying to fight my way back to the old person that I used to be. The affair has just about ruined my life. It is not a bed of roses. Any joy felt is only for a moment.<P>

Joined: Mar 2000
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Hooray!!! qu is back!! [Linked Image from marriagebuilders.com] [Linked Image from marriagebuilders.com]<P>God is with you. This is such an incredibly powerful prayer group!! I can see that you are being blessed as I have been.<P>Keep reading and posting here. Can't think of any better way to get through withdrawal! Of course taking St. John's Wort (an herbal antidepressent) hasn't hurt either.

Joined: Sep 2000
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Hi,<BR>Thank you all for your thoughts!!!! It makes me feel so happy that you took the time to write. For some reason my computer didn't register your replies so I just happened to look and see that I did get a reply.<BR>I have been praying today that God would give me a desire to WANT to love my husband again because that is a big issue. H is trying so hard and I am almost feeling smothered...Thanks SO much for the ideas & thoughts. I know that I need to find someone here intown to pray with, we are failry new, not hooked in to church too well. It always takes so much time but I'm trying to trust God will supply my needs not OM. Blessings on all of you!!

Joined: Jun 1999
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MarilynRae,<P>I am praying for you too. God bless you...<P>Father, thank You for being our Rock, our Savior, our Fortress. Thank You for taking us under your wing, protecting us. Lord I pray that a hedge of protection is placed around MarilynRae, thwarting all attempts by Satan to attack her. Father, thank You for your love for MarilynRae, and comforting her. Lord, I pray that You will remove all thoughts of the OM from MarilynRae, as far away from her as east is from west. Give her contentment within her marriage, and I pray that You will be right next to her husband, leading him in the way that You want him to go. Lord, we know You are in control, and thank You for the work You are doing in this marriage. I pray that the Words of Christ, in all their richness live in MarilynRae and her husband, making them wise. Let MarilynRae walk in the light of the Lord and walk as a child of Light, not darkness. Give MarilynRae the whole armor of God, so that she will defeat the enemy glorifying You. Thank You Lord for Your unending love and guidance. IJN AMEN


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