Why? Because the weekends are the toughest and it always starts on Friday. H has been trying to spend time with our D this week. I am greatful for that. Last Saturday we spent a few hours together during the day and then that night he unexpectantly stopped in for about an hour. It was pretty relaxing - no expectations. This week he spent Monday with our D (his idea) and Wednesday I left to go out of town for an overnight business trip. He took her to his mom's for the night. He is staying with the OW so he can't bring our D there. Last night around 9pm he called and told me he was right outside and wanted to know if he could stop in to put in his contacts. He got new colored ones and wanted to show them to me because I hadn't seen them yet. He was heading out with the guys but I thought it was kind of strange that he would "just drop by". When he was leaving it seemed like he was hesitating a little. I don't hug him anymore when he leaves me. I'm afraid it makes him too uncomfortable and I can't afford to do that. Yet it seemed like he was about to hug me and then stopped short of it. I called him this morning and left him a message on his voice mail. Told him I thought he looked very handsome last night. Then told him to call me later in the day. He called about 20 minutes later. Didn't have to but he did. I was bringing our D to preschool and he asked for me to stop by on the way. NEVER has he asked for me to do that. So we did. He visited with our D and then we had to get going. I told him to have a good day and I would talk to him later. I buckled our D in the car and when I looked up he was walking away but still looking back at me. I just smiled and said Bye. Now it's Friday night and he will be with her this weekend (I think). It is fishing opener and he plans on going out for it. He said he was going with his dad or his friend (someone I know) but I also know he could end up taking her instead. I'm having a real tough week as it is and the weekend only make it worse. During the week I feel like we are making progress then the weekend comes and we take a few steps back - his head seems to come out of the clouds then goes back in. <P>Okay. I just needed to get that out. None of my friends understand what I'm going through as they haven't gone through it themselves. This about the only place I can go to get some relief.<P>Thanks for listening to me...<P> <P>------------------<BR>Molli

Yes, Molli, I know exactly how you feel on Fridays. I can usually make it thru the week without too much crying and hurt. It's the weekends, when I am trying to relax and let down my guard that the hurt and crying start. I can hardly go to church anymore...it starts first thing in the morning and I can't seem to keep it under control.<P>It's bee 7 months now since this all started. It seemed like a few months ago it might be getting better, but now I think it's getting worse. I'm starting to feel desparate again....each day that goes by is one more day away from him. I hardly ever see or hear from his at all. We have no kids or anything else to keep us on contact with each other....he's totally abandoned his life...house, dogs, friends, etc....and is just living in this little world of the OW and his work (where no one knows about this at all).<P>It's the pits. I'll make an agreement with you....I'll think of and pray for you on the weekends if you'll do the same for me.<P>Thanks and Aloha,<BR>Mrs. O

Gosh Mrs. O, Was going thru archives and read this post. My gosh our stories are so similar. H & I have no kids, we've been married 15 yrs, together 20.<P>This is the second time he's done this. I consider him a serial cheater.<P>The week-ends are bad for me too. I have no family of my own, my H's family was my family. But now it's uncomfortable when I see them. So I'm cutting back.<P>H has been gone for 1 month today. I cry alot, mostly in the mornings, and then when the week-end rolls around I'm weeping all day. My H started this 1 yr 1 month ago. I Plan A'd for a yr. Hardest thing I've ever done. My friends don't understand any of this either. None of them have experienced it. Feel like an outcast. Somedays I want to just run, et in my car and dive and drive and never return. Making myself go to work is very hard but thats all I have. That sounds so sad, but true. Never wbated to be a person without any family and only have a job to fill my time. I'm praying all the time. Since joining the forum I also pray for everyone I've encountered in this forum. I know God's listening. <P>-Jo