The last time I posted I said I was thinking about taking my son and going away for a few days. Well, I have made reservations for mid November. I’m looking forward to getting away for a few days with my son. My question is, we have two dogs that are staying with me. My W asked me if she could take care of them and stay at the house while I’m gone. The 1st time she asked me I flat out said no and that I will get a neighbor to take care of them. At this point in our relationship I feel if she wants to be out of my life then she needs to be out of my life for good except for issues dealing with our son. Well, she sent me an e-mail today asking again if she could “please watch the dogs”. I’m not sure what to do. I have so many questions running through my mind on this. Here are just a few.<P>Is this in anyway a chance for her to come home without coming out and saying it? I think she is seeing OM. I feel her mom supports everything she is doing and supports the A. GGGRRRRRR [img]images/icons/mad.gif" border="0[/img] <P>Should I just leave her stay at the house and watch the dogs and see what happens from there?<P>Should I just leave her stay at the house and watch the dogs and ask her to be out of the house by the time I get home? I feel this is what will happen even if I don’t ask her to.<P>Should I leave her watch the dogs but ask her not to stay at the house?<P>Should I just tell her I will get a neighbor to take care of them?<P>Any advice is greatly appreciated.<P>BTW I’m starting to feel better and stronger about myself everyday. The more I feel like this the less energy I put in to trying and save my M and the less I think about what she is and has done to me. Is this a natural behavior? I do still love my W and hope someday we can reconcile. However, I feel that the hope is starting to fade away. <P>HeartBrokenHusband

Hi HBH,<P>I can't recall your story, so I have to ask if you are in Plan A or Plan B. If you are in Plan A, I would consider allowing her to take the dogs, but NOT at your house...she is gone, remember? And why is she so anxious to get back there when you are gone? Looking for something, perhaps? Sorry, there goes that cynical part of me....anyway, allow her to care for the dogs, certainly if she can do it at her place.<P>Plan B is anopther matter. In Plan B you aren't to meet ANY of her emotional needs...no contact, not allowing her any personal satisfaction from actions of your doing...it is to let her know what it would be like if you were not part of her life at all, as well as protecting your love for her.....so if in Plan B, no, she is infringing on your life, and if you say yes, you are meeting one of her emotional needs...that of caring for the dogs.<P>Hope this helps!!!<P>Love and light,<P>Jacky