Finally, the phone bills arrived! I never told my h I was planning to check them to confirm his story of only calling a phone sex person TWO times. He lied, as I suspected. The nagging question I did have was whether or not he was telling me the truth about it being phone sex......especially after I overheard him say "we ought to get together some time" I called the number and it was a phone sex line. Our next phone bill will cover May 11-the present.......I'm extremely curious about what will show up there. Tonight I am going to question him about some calls I don't recognize and see if he tells the truth about them.

I feel betrayed and bad all over again (((frown))) And wonder why people lie so much to the one they say they love and can't live without. About 3 or 4 months ago, I posted on MB on the emotional needs forum because I wondered why he was making excuses about not wanting to make love........he sighted stress as the problem....I only wish I had those old phone bills. My feeling is this has gone on a long time. It hurts of course. I feel so much anger. But I'm also a survivor.

Roberta

I'm sorry Roberta. I remember that pit in the stomach feeling of getting phone bills and finding yet more evidence. It's horrible.

I don't know what state you're in, but in CA you can sign up for online bill pay with your phone service. Once you do that you can view all your past bills for at least a year back. Something to consider. You could also call the phone company and request the old bills.

Take care.

Yeah....my stomach was in pretty bad shape. When my h came home I did confront him and said he didn't want to disclose how much he had being doing this because it would hurt me....no kidding!!

A couple things in his favor, however. He told me that when the next bill comes, I will see that after I caught him, he has kept his word about not doing it anymore. That one is at least easy to prove when the phone bill comes again. I imagine he wouldn't say that unless it was true.

And secondly, it was phone sex....despite his reference to "we ought to get together some time" Boy was I NOT believing him at all about it being phone sex....thought he was planning to meet someone.

I resent the fact that I'm going through this...naturally. Just like everyone else here, I hurt. But it sure is nice to have a place to vent, feel hurt, get support..........THANKS!!!

Roberta

I seem to be pretty angry lately. Finding it hard to love my H. I think about all the good times we have shared and wonder how it ended up this way.

I'm planning to get old phone bills because I need to know the truth and the extent of the problem.

I've told my h what my philosophy is long before this ever came about:

"I'd rather hear the truth, even if I don't like what I hear, rather than to hear a bunch of bull****."