Hello,
<br>I am 33yr old male with a wife and 2 children. We have recently (18 months ago) move 1100 mi from our home to a new state so that I can start my own company. From the beginning my wife has had problems adjusting to the move and things are just getting worse. We seeked the advise of a counselor from our HMO but he said that we did not have a marriage problem but that we just needed to grow up and make an adult decision on weather to stay or go home. My children are 18 months and 3 and a half yrs old. She was at home full time so we thought that getting her back into her career would get her some identity and adult contact. That has not worked. She visits back home every two and a half months for 7 to 10 days but when she returns she is always more depressed than when she left. Sex has never been a problem in the past, until her recent return. She informed me that she could not identify with me on a physical level, but that she still loves me. She says that it's not me or the things I do or don't do, but that she is just miserable being away from her family back home. We both agree that our marriage is worth working for and are in the process of trying to find another counselor. We moved here because it was a better financial market for my company, and because of the nature of her job it would be easy for her to get work. Our conflict is that I feel my family is just her and the kids, and she feels that it also includes her parents and siblings. I love my parents and siblings but I'm trying to see the bigger picture of what is better for us. I must admit that I do have a brother down here with me who is also my partner. I would like to know if we should even try to go to a counselor, or was the last one right saying that we need to grow up and make an adult decision. Or should I try and get my wife some help with adjusting to our new surroundings. I have done a little research on relocation stress syndrom but do you think that this would help after 18 months.
<br>Thank you DL