Hello All!<P>I Just found this site tonite. It may just be exactly what I needed!<P>Some History:<BR>Been married almost 8 years, we had a beautiful baby a year ago. My W & I have not been mutually happy for a good while now (even before the baby).<P>What Just Happened:<BR>I guess it is safe to say that we have been hovering between the conflict and withdrawl stage for a while.<P>Today, I think my W has gone over the edge into Withdrawl. She told me that she does not want to "even be in this house with you".<P>I love her dearly and love my son even more so, and as such have been in what I think is pseudo plan A (appeasing and trying to do whatever I can to meet her needs), but I am obviously not suceeding (as I seem to just make her more angry when I do so).<P>She has been verbally abusive and constantly threatens with Divorce whenever she becomes angry, and even lashes out at my family (mother, sister) verbally.<P>I know have read this site A-Z and now realize that I have poorly tried to address her emotional needs (communication, 1-1 time and recreation time are probably the highest for her). I would like to immediately change my focus on meeting these needs, but I know that I will get resistance as she is in complete withdrawl now.<P>Any ideas on how to get through her withdrawl quickly and effectively? This is my only option!<P>Thanks!

solrac,<P>Welcome to the Marriage Builders page. You've started out on the right foot by reading everything here. The books are good too...."His Needs, Her Needs" and "Love Busters". I would suggest ordering them or running to the closest book store and getting them.<P>Concerning your wife, could she be suffering from some type of depression? My W has for years and it has really affected her behavior. She has recently receive help and it's beginning to make a difference.<P>Since you have a good idea what her most important needs are....MEET THEM, MEET THEM AND MEET THEM. In other words, go into Plan A. Put your needs aside for now; put all your efforts into meeting her needs. Give it six months, you will see a difference.<P>Concerning your mother and sister and your W's behavior towards them; could she be jealous of your relationship with them? If you think she is, limit your contact with you mother and sister. I know this will be difficult to do bc of your child. I have a mother that would like me to visit her once a week without my W and kids. She and I are very close and I know she misses seeing and talking with me. But, thankfully, I live too far away for that to happen, so that isn't a big issue with my W.<P>Remember, just Plan A, Plan A and Plan A.<P>Also, you may want to post in the Emotional Needs Area. There is more traffic there and this post concerns emotional needs. I'll check back here to see if you've posted again.<P>Hang in There!

You've come to the right place!<BR>Just wondering if you've considered the possibility of post-partum depression? Your baby is just one yr old - this could be a factor!!<BR>check it out.