I love my boyfriend. We have known eachother for a year now. We have dated since June. I need to move to LA for my career (we live in SF) and he decided that would also be a good move for him. We cohabitate currently, each of us has our own expensive apartment. I do not make very much money, and my boyfriend does. Living together in a new city would make the most sense, but I don't think that we are ready to marry yet. I am 24 and he is 32. He would be more ready financially and age-wise. I want to live comfortably, have companionship, and not be impoverished by a move, but I would rather take more time with the relationship. Ideally I would wait, but like many people who live together before marriage, it is for financial purposes. How does this fit into the priniciples of marriage builders?

It really doesn't--

Read the book Buyers, Renters and Freeloaders.

Cohabitation, even for purely financial reasons, carries with it a certain mindset. It is not a good intermediate step for the vast majority of couples and the divorce rate is actually higher for couples who cohabitate.
If you are going to live together before you are ready to marry, please be very proactive about researching and understanding the risks involved with this decision. At least prepare yourselves for the problems that tend to arise both short-term and long-term.
There are articles on MB about living together before marriage and tons of others out there if you just run a search. Actually, I was once pro-cohabitation and have tried many times to find a reputable resource that supports it...there really isn't anything. Studies show that people who cohabitate tend to get divorced more frequently than those who do not. So, again, take the time to research this topic as it could end very poorly for you and is very much worth the time and effort to make the right decision for you and your boyfriend.

Best of luck,
Smile

<small>[ November 08, 2004, 03:01 PM: Message edited by: SmileADay ]</small>