It seems to me that being "in love" constitutes infatuation and that loving a person is real.<P>What do you guys think?

This is kinda like the debate we are having about conditional love...<BR>Many believe that we fall "in love" with someone and that is the "giddy" feeling that initially attracts us to someone, while "love" is unconditional and enduring. <BR>My view is that without being "in love" we will lose the "love". And that is where we must work on our marriage and give it the priority it deserves. <BR>Too many of us (certainly me included) tend to take our marriage for granted, we just believe it will always be there, even if we are inconsiderate, don't treat the relationship with respect, etc. Because of "love" I contend unless we nurture the relationship, try to keep those "in love" feelings there, the marriage will either die, or not be the kind of happy relationship it can be. <BR>Dana had said she believes it is a combination of the two, and that may be the case. <BR><P>------------------<BR>Susan

Hi Omaha (what do we call you here?), <P>I think that love means so many different things to everyone, that its truly what you as a person define it to be in your heart.<P>To me, falling in love is that "butterfly in your stomach feeling", you want to learn everything about him, you think about him, you miss him, you are in a way , infatuated at times, giddy like Sue said. You feel chemistry between you. Its hard to explain, but you just know when it is happening .<P>This feeling starts to wear off and you start to find that real love, if its possible. You respect that other person, you value their opinion, they become like a best friend to you, you worry about their well being, etc. This kind of love, starts to grow out of life experiences , going thru certain things together that bring you closer.<P>Once you have that REAL love, its so very hard to let it go. I think many of us 'betrayed' can relate that we'll always love our ex's in some way. Does it mean we're in love with them??? NO not at all.<P>I still think its possible to love someone and be in love in a relationship and marriage. My aunt and uncle have been married 30 years. They still hold hands in public. He hides easter eggs with gifts in them at easter for her, he does crazy, yet romantic things like this all the time!! To see them, you feel their love for each other.<P>They have this because they work incredibly hard at meeting each others needs. They tell me all the time that they truly feel the right two people can achieve this. Obviously you have to at least be compatible on some general issues.<P>My grandparents, married 61 years, say that real love is found thru time and trials and tribulations, (this is straight from gram) and that what makes your love is how you stand up thru the hard times and stay together and get thru it as a couple. Anyone can get along great during easy times. But its lifes hardest lessons that define our relationships, morals and love. When you plow thru those bad times and come out of it together, you have that true love. <P>Well, thats it for me, my answer, plus that of two very respected couples to me who are an inspiration to what I hope to be lucky enough to share on day in the future.<P>Prayers, Dana<P>

Omaha,<P>I can't add a single thing better then what Dana just said!<P>Man, Dana I have to say, you DO have a way with words, I was thinking all morning how to reply Omaha, and then poof came Dana's post!<P>Hope it makes as much sense to you Omaha as it does me! VERY GOOD Dana!!!!<P>See this enlightened ME even though it wasn't direct to my post!<P>Omaha, let me know if you need to sit down and talk, you know how to get ahold of me!<P>Can be around after 12 Saturday on! And know how to get ahold of you too!<P>Just let me know okay!<P>Drew!

Thanks, I am going to my parents this weekend with my two boys. I am leaving the wife at home. Of Course she doesn't want to come. It will be a nice break!

ENJOY Omaha<P>Give yourself a little breather! You need it...sort your mind! Some night next week after work can hook up in you want! Will be out of town from next Friday through late Sunday, But just take care and DON'T GIVE UP okay!<P>Drew!