well i'm back, and it looks like there is no other place for me but divorce court. i feel so numb i know i've told other people before, it gets better and they'll feel better in a few days, but that advise is hard to swallow from where i sit today. i always thought one day my H would wake up and realize what he was losing and we'd be back together again. its been a year and half and he won't give up drinking and he hasn't really gotten therapy (1 visit a month) and he blames me for everything, he is sooooo in the fog....and i just can't go on anymore, i need closure, i need to move on, i can't even imagine putting all the water under the bridge aside anymore. how can two people who claim they love each other make each other hate each other so much? he blames me for his sons not calling him or his parents, he blames me for everything. now i'm raising two teenage sons (15 & 17) and the 17 year old's new pregnant wife who will give birth sometime around Christmas. Holidays thats another thing i could skip. <P>Sorry about the venting here, badly needed, guess i'm feeling sorry for myself, thanks.<P>O<BR>

.<p>[This message has been edited by Trapped Mom (edited March 25, 2001).]

is him really him you hate? or is it the drinking you hate? there is a difference..<BR>And he won't wake up from the fog until he learns to face the consequences of his own actions..even as far as others not calling him..don't enable him, don't lie about his drinking..if he doesn't go to work because he's hungover don't call his boss and lie for him and tell him he's sick..(thats enabling)<P>IMHO if you move out..and leave him to tend for himself..pay his bills, buy his own groceries..he will either get responsible or find someone else to enable him...but you need to get yourself on solid ground.