The reason why our bras don't always match our underwear is because WE actually change our underwear. <P>The next time you and your buddies joke about armed women in combat, take a poll to see which of you successfully aim at the toilet rim. <P>If we're watching football with you--it's not bonding--it's their butts. <P>Whenever possible, please try to say whatever you have to say after the movie. <P>No, we're not impressed with your car -- it takes no special skills to make car payments each month. <P>Lay off the beans several hours before bedtime. <P>Our bedtime headaches are inversely proportional to the number of baths you take.<P>If you were really looking for an honest answer, you wouldn't ask in bed. <P>We don't care if you hold the remote -- unlike you however, we don't enjoy watching 27 seconds of 117 different programs.<P>The next time you joke about female drivers, research the number of accidents caused by rubber-necking mini-skirts.<BR> <BR>Stop telling us most male strippers are gay: we don't care. <P>When you're not around, I belch loudly, too. <P>We don't mind if you look in the mirror to check your appearance -- in fact -- please do !!! <P>Have a strong need for male bonding? Visit your proctologist. <P>Your contributions to your child should go above and beyond that y chromosome you unselfishly sacrificed.<P>When you're out with us, please wear "our" favorite outfit rather than "yours" -- the torn jeans and dirty T-Shirt will last longer that way. <P>If you must grunt in reply, please develop a system to indicate a positive vs a negative grunt.<P>Don't insist that we "get off the damn phone" and then not talk to us. <P>Eye contact is best established above our shoulder-level. <P>Some women actually know more about a car and the mechanics involved than you do.<BR> <BR>Cleaning the house is not necessarily "women's work"; besides, most of the "dirt" and clutter is yours anyway. <P>Yes, we know most of the great chefs are men, why is it then you never want to cook? <P>We go to the Ladies Room in groups to talk about you.<P>Yes, we know you can probably beat us arm wrestling; however, very few raises or promotions were gained by arm wrestling the boss for one.<P><BR>Let the games begain. -Java

OMG! Java you're killing me!!<P>ROTFLMAO!!!!<P>Mitzi

Java....<P>LOL! I haven't laughed this much in SOOOOO long!!!!<P>Thanks!<P>Ragamuffin

see I have a sense of humor too. Is that the best you can do?

Jax- I am just getting warmed up... I should state for the reccord that I have yet to see anything from you. Are you just all talk or can you back up your words with action???? <P>-Java

Hey Java... Here's and addition for you list...<P>Our bedtime headaches are inversly proportional to the number of beers you had with "the boys" after work.<P>If you have to ask... it wasn't good for me too.<P> B